My only possession (chanlix)

Truth

Felix:

I nervously sat on my sofa as I waited for Seonghwa... I can tell he's not too happy, so I know he'll intentionally be late.

He's just so petty, but I guess I'd rather that then someone who always fogged with me... but I would like to have his trust, just like ch-

No... no. I shouldn't compare them...

*knock knock*

Oh here he is finally...

I walk over to the door in my oversized sweats and open the door expecting Seonghwa to be there with a cold stare like usual, but-

"Ch-Chan? What are you doing here? And how do you know where I live?"

I stared blankly at chan who was standing at my door with a bouquet of flowers... why is he-

"Can I come in?"

"W-well not really I'm waiting for Seonghwa..."

I was shocked to see him here... why is he here? And why does he have those flowers?

"He isn't coming."

Chan plainly said, what does he mean? Seonghwa can't be that mad at me that he wouldn't show up..right?

"How do you know.. I bet you're just lying, just like you lied to Seonghwa about me leaving because I was 'bored'"

I watched as chan sighed and rolled his eyes before he leaned casually on my doorframe. This guys attitude has seriously changed... but I guess he's acting like his old self... the chan I met for the first time, when he didn't care about many things...

"You've changed Felix... you used to have so much optimism and you always gave people 2nd chances..."

I looked at chan confused as he began to ramble about the old me, the old naive me who trusted everyone so easily, but chan changed that. He taught me that even the people closest to you can misuse your trust...

"Where are you going with this Chan? So what if I was like that? But I'm not that naive boy anymore. You made sure of that when you starting dating Jamie! Did you ever think for a second how I felt when I would see you on the news kissing and going on dates with her?! Did you ever think of how I felt when you wouldn't come home?! Did you ever think of how I felt when I would wake up in the morning alone! Only to see you on the news because you were on a 'romantic' trip with Jamie!"

Chan stood in shock as I had finally given up holding in these suppressed emotions, I had finally let this weight on my shoulder finally dropped and it felt good to finally say all these things I had been holding back on... but there was one more thing I needed to say..

"And how do you think I felt when you said I don't understand you?... chan at that time I was most likely the only person who understood you, but you chose to push me away because you felt like it was the only way to keep you safe..."

I finally finished and I wanted to close the door in Chan's face and end it all right there and then, but instead-

"I'm so sorry Felix" chan pulled me into his arms and held me so tightly.. just like he used to when we were going through hard times... and it still feels the same... "I'm so fucking sorry Felix... I love you... I love you so much and I regret everything I did to us... I'm sorry I neglected you..."

He held me in that warm hug for a while and I didn't even bother to push him off... I couldn't... the feeling of his arms around me was too intoxicating and it brought back so many euphoric, happy memories that will forever be special...

"Felix... can I come in now.. and can I explain myself even more... I think you deserve to hear."

Chan made me look up at him and I just softly nodded before leading chan into my apartment.