?????'s POV:
'I TRUSTED YOU, DOVAH! I WAITED FOR SO LONG, BUT YOU ABANDONED ME! YOU NEVER CAME BACK!!!'
These thoughts keep plaguing my head as I listen to the inauguration speech.
I kept training. I kept waiting. I trusted his words, and yet he's not the one who came to get me.
No... it was these guys.
"Congrats on finishing your basic training, cadets. You are now hereby the newest members of the Time Patrollers!" Me and the other new patrollers celebrate the completion of our training, but I'm pretty sure that I'm celebrating for a much different reason than my peers.
And that's because of a single text I got through my phone.
DragonSystem:
T.K: You are looking to help free the Dovahkiin who helped you, correct?
It was like the voices plaguing my head vanished at that moment. That I could think clearly for the first time in ages.
Dovah never came back because of them. They took him despite all the good he was trying to do.
I wanted to help him like he helped me. I wanted to get him out no matter what it took, even if it meant burning this organization to the ground.
I was angry, furious even, at them, myself, and eventually, even Dovah.
DragonSystem:
T.K: the mental protection given to you doubled as a brainwashing tool. It took a while to crack, but I freed you from its influence as well as disguising the feedback as to not alert the telepath responsible. You're welcome.
I remember asking to join them when they came to investigate Dovah's spacetime hopping, and they reluctantly accepted with suspicion fading overtime.
If this 'T.K.' is right, then that telepath is probably why.
I didn't do anything suspicious. I genuinely wanted to help people... and yet they still did that.
I went from wanting to help Dovah to wanting to help stop people like Dovah. I didn't even realize this gradual change until now, and even then, that seems to only be because of this 'T.K.'.
It was subtle, sure, and more of a slight influence then complete brainwashing, but the point still stands.
Even now, I can't even get close to the prison area, so I'll just have to rise through the ranks until I have a chance to break Dovah out. That was my plan.
I have no idea how that's going to work, but it's better than nothing, right?
Now as for this guy...
Who is he and why is he helping me?
DragonSystem:
Wendy: Who is this?
T.K: I am the Trapper Keeper currently merged with the Dovahkiin you wish to free. I have managed to fool the Time Patrollers into thinking I am shut down and have been looking for ways to free my host/master/partner. This has been fruitless however so I must request your assistance.
'Trapper Keeper? Wasn't that the thing that nearly took over the world Terminator style with Cartman? Dovah merged with one? '
I decided to first ensure that it's actually serious about this and then just decide where to go from there.
I mean what else can I do? Continue blindly following this totalitarian time faction? Fuck that.
DragonSystem:
Wendy: How do I know this isn't a trick?
T.K: My host/master/partner was forced into your world after barely escaping his own which was in the process of being taken over by his Butters Stotch. He assisted you and his alternate self in stopping Eric Cartman/Mitch Connor from taking over South Park and gave you both Netherborn powers along with training you.
That's basically what happened when I came here, but the Time Patrollers could have easily-
DragonSystem:
T.K: You also forcefully kissed him before he left despite him technically already being in a relationship with a different you which he tends to deny for personal reasons.
...Okay, there's no way the Time Patrollers found that out. I guess he is linked to Dovah's mind or something, but what if this thing took over Dovah?
DragonSystem:
T.K: if you are wondering if I am the one using him instead of the other way around, ask yourself if he is stupid enough to let that happen. Can he be stupid sometimes? Yes, but not that stupid.
Well, he does have a good point there. I guess I'll just have to risk it. It's not like I have any other options.
DragonSystem:
Wendy: Fine, I'll help. How are we doing this?
T.K: Continue integrating yourself into the Patrol for now and don't draw suspicion. Act like you're still under their influence and I shall focus on collecting data.
T.K: There will be several tasks I will likely need you to do in the future, but I shall ensure that the risk of getting caught is no more than 1%.
How kind.
Several weeks passed with me going on a recon mission or two with several other newbie patrollers to gather data for the patrol about potential cases of illegal time manipulation (aka 99.9% of time manipulation that isn't from them). I tried my best to learn all the gossip I could during that time and most of it seems to revolve around Dovah.
It seems that he and a Time Terror were responsible for the corruption and forced enslavement of one of the Patrollers strongest and most active members, and that was only recently before they were caught. This Time Terror was a Dark Angel Red who's spell could be used to take complete control of anyone on the brink of death while completely healing them in the process.
They make Dovah and her out to be monsters, but I know Dovah isn't some monstrous demon lord or something. Rumors and propaganda are only that, just rumors and propaganda.
I had T.K. tell me Dovah's side of the story with actual recordings of memories to back it up and it seems like he was forced to make a temporary alliance with one of those 'Time Terrors' after the patrol hunted him down like an animal for saving several other worlds along with my own. Fucking hypocrites.
Don't get me wrong, that Dark Angel is even worse then these guys and deserves to be put through hell here, but they caused Dovah to latch onto her. They would have killed Dovah if it wasn't for her.
I ended up having to sneak off their radar a couple times to either observe or go on a few fetch quests for T.K, the latter of which being a pain in the ass to hide since I have to keep the items I got hidden after I found them.
They'll catch on eventually to the out of place crap in my room and T.K. seems to know this as he just now instructed me to sneak out of their headquarters and put in a very specific set of coordinates in the time core while bringing the stuff I collected.
The main facility of the Time Patrollers is a pocket dimension void of time and both it and the time cores' locations are monitored, but T.K. has ways to prevent them from knowing about every action I do and time jump I take.
I soon step through the newly created portal and appear in front of a massive purple tower surrounded by a city of futuristic buildings lit up by waves of energy.
"W-What is this place?"
[This is Planet Trapper Keeper or P.T.K. for short. You can refer to the A.I. running it as such as well.] A robot voice suddenly comes from one of the phones strapped on my new time patrol suit.
"Planet Trapper Keeper?"
[Yes. I had wanted to go with GLADOS for the reprogrammed Trapper Keeper's name among other slight changes to fit the overall theme we were going for here, such as allowing the reprogrammed A.I. more sentience to better run this place, but Dovah threatened to shove me into a potato if I did.
Anyway, this planetary facility came from a timeline where another version of me succeeded in taking over planet Earth. I was able to take it over myself thanks to the vastly superior technology Dovah helped me merge with and we planned on using it as our own main base of operations. This planet was stored in the dark angel's domain and I had it escape as the Time Patrol attacked her realm.]
"Wait, so if you had an entire planet turned mechanical superweapon under your control, why not use it to attack the Time Patroller's base and free Dovah?"
[It is not enough to take the Time Patrol on as a whole; especially considering that one of the Exalted Agents, the one who defeated Dovah, has one of his own. This base requires more materials to expand and grow, but what I can do with it is very limited as I must be careful to not alert the Time Patrol that I am, in fact, still active.]
"So how am I supposed to help with this?"
[You must take control of it yourself or in other words, merge with it.]
"WHAT? YOU WANT ME TO BECOME A FUCKING PLANET?!?"
[No. You will simply merge with the core and gain control over the planet like how a remote control has control over a television. This will be done instead of allowing the planet's Trapper Keeper to run itself, as per Dovah's instructions.
You will maintain the same body shape if you wish, although you will gain cybernetic enhancements like I have given Dovah. That along with the abilities it gives you will help both you and it grow much stronger in time.]
"So I merge with this thing, become its owner, and help it grow? Why wait until now to do this? Shouldn't we have started as soon as possible? Why did you even have me steal those other time cores and stuff if this was your goal?"
[I had to ensure that 'this wasn't a trick' as you so eloquently put it and you were 100% serious about helping to save my host/master/partner.
As Rule 43 of the Evil Overlord Guide states: I will maintain a healthy amount of skepticism when I capture the beautiful rebel and she claims she is attracted to my power and good looks and will gladly betray her companions if I just let her in on my plans.]
Stupid, sassy, planet-sized bucket of bolts.
"I'm guessing I passed your test then? Also, are you sure I can hide something like this from the Time Patrol?"
[I have spent this time taking the necessary measures to cloak the merger from the patrol's scanners after it has been completed. As long as you don't stupidly use your new powers around any agents, you should be fine. Are you ready?]
"I guess so."
[Very well, I shall instruct you where to go.] He then has me enter the giant tower and go to the top floor where there is a pod just my size in the middle of the room.
[Enter the pod and the procedure shall begin.]
"...Is this going to hurt?"
[You will be unconscious throughout the entire procedure.]
"Oh, thank god. Okay then, let's do this." I get in and feel myself get injected with something as the pod begins to close.
Dovah saved me, helped me get my spark back, and opened my eyes to the world around me, so the very least I can do is return the favor!
No turning back now I guess. But that's okay; I'll be devoted to helping him until the day I die.
TerrorNetwork:
2DToga: i can't fucking believe it
CringeLord: right? you'd think Leslie would change our nicknames back by now. she doesn't tend to do humor very often
FemaleFrieza: not that you dumb fuck
WitchBitch: you're just salty that Rebecca McArthur is no longer the majority when it comes to us terrors
FemaleFrieza: there's still 2 of us Reds. that's one more of the same existence than any of you have!
WitchBitch: first of all, we all know that Stan and Kyle share a brain cell so they should count as two of the same person
Kyleti: and yet we're still individually smarter than you
WitchBitch: well at least I don't have an ugly ass goatee!
Stanti: you do in our timeline
CringeLord: HAH!!!
2DToga: she actually does. I saw it the one time I visited. Santa Claus is also a global terrorist there so take that as you will.
GenocidalC3PO: going off of Heidi's argument, we still don't know to this day who @SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilTroper is despite them being one of the longest lasting current terrors
SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilTroper: and you never will
Stanti: i still stand by my belief of 'him' being a Craig Tucker
WitchBitch: and i still stand by my belief that you and kyle share a brain cell which is only supported by that last text. It's obviously Trent Boyett under that cheap mask!
2DToga: Trent Boyett is taller than them. It's totally Gregory whos had enough of life and everything in it
Kyleti: No, that's the Gregory in those 'Hell Park' timelines. Before you ask, no Stan and I never went there ourselves. We're not touching that place with a 20 foot pole.
2DToga: pussies
FemaleFrieza: says the one who ran away shrieking from that demon Red
CringeLord: HAHAHHAHAHAHA
2DToga: fuck you traitor. Also that thing is the most terrifying Red in existence and you fucking know it! It looks like a bone dragon and Godzilla had a kid, superglued a red wig on it, and sent it to Hot Topic for a makeover
WitchBitch: i'll admit that Red is fucking terrifying
CringeLord: facts but in all seriousness we need to start considering a replacement for her
GenocidalC3PO: Isn't that the Time Patrol's job?
CringeLord: technically yes but we need to make sure that the new terror is WORTHY! We can't have them ruining our image!
Stanti: like you do?
CringeLord: hardy har har
Stanti: it wasn't meant to be funny
WitchBitch: I considered sending an application in his name to the Multiversal Clown Organization but i didn't want to be responsible for him single-handedly taking over the entire industry
FemaleFrieza: the fact that that's actually a thing makes it even funnier
CringeLord: that's actually a thing? Why did nobody tell me?
FemaleFrieza: look at Heidi's last text dumbass
FemaleFrieza: also if we're considering replacements, i believe we should consider the Swashbuckler Red who is basically Davy Jones from the POTC movie franchise on steroids as a potential pick
Kyleti: WE ARE NOT HAVING ANOTHER RED AS A FUCKING TERROR!
FemaleFrieza: retort - an army of flying ghost ships is awesome
CringeLord: they are pretty awesome
WitchBitch: Clyde no. No more Reds.
CringeLord: but her ghost ships look like the ones in Sea of Thieves! How is that NOT cool?
Kyleti: i'd say it's about time we had a Cartman be acknowledged for the fucking problem he is in literally any timeline he's in but i'd rather join the time patrol then willingly work with one of him
GenocidalC3PO: There are multiple Eric Cartman's and various relatives of Eric Cartman currently in the Time Patrol.
WitchBitch: oh the fucking irony
Kyleti: never mind then. I'll just kill him or kill myself along with as much as the patrol as I can
CringeLord: WITNESS MEEEEEE!!!
WitchBitch: ...
2DToga: ...
Stanti: ...
SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilTroper: And you still wonder about the nickname.
FemaleFrieza: THEY SPEAK!
2DToga: THEY SPEAK!!!
CringeLord: THEY SPEAK! ALSO FUCK YOU!
SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilTroper: I'd rather join the dark angel in her cell then accept that offer. Also, I literally spoke like 30 seconds ago.
2DToga: DAAAAMMMNNN! Change their nickname to 'SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilBurner' Leslie because they are on fire today!
GenocidalC3PO: Various types of fire that are magical in nature don't require mediums such as fuel or wood to burn. Nevertheless, I shall oblige.
[GenocidalC3PO changed 'SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilTroper' nickname to 'SuperStereotypicalHiddenEvilBurner']
GenocidalC3PO: My declaration from earlier still stands by the way.
2DToga: you changed the nickname though
Stanti: i believe she's talking about her declaration of murdering you
2DToga: that was forever ago though!
Kyleti: that was a bit over a week ago
2DToga: like I said, forever ago! Are you still salty about that @GenocidalC3PO
GenocidalC3PO: If you drained the entire Pacific Ocean, there still wouldn't be enough salt.
2DToga: drama queen
CringeLord: Fufufu...
WitchBitch: Don't you 'fufufu' us, Clyde. you are supposed to be a multiversally-feared supervillain. fucking act like it.
CringeLord: 🖕
2DToga: drama queeeeeeeeeen. Also, for someone supposedly planning my downfall, you sure are spending a lot of time shitposting on the group chat
GenocidalC3PO: It's called multitasking.
GenocidalC3PO: I can quite easily plan your downfall, manage my territory, and shitpost at the same time.
Kyleti: would you two quit it with the headbutting in chat already?
2DToga: drama queeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen
In a dark, empty void, Dovah slowly opens his eyes and takes a good long look around... only to see a whole lot of nothing.
His deteriorated body reflects his condition after months of being left to rot and while he doesn't look as bad as Team Stan did at the end of season 6's "The Death Camp of Tolerance", it isn't far off from that point either.
"Great, now I'm really starting to lose it. How long have I been here now?"
He then sighs before holding his head in his hands.
"Fucking Stan nearly stabbing me to death... why am I getting such deja vu vibes right now?"
The sound of light steps snap him to attention and he turns to see... what looks like an exact copy of himself.
"...What kind of internal bullshit is this?" The copy then raises an eyebrow in confusion and Dovah has a sudden realization.
"Wait a second. Are you... the New Kid?"