Ship: Han x Skz
Little: Han
Plot: After everyone finds out about Hans little space side, they suddenly start to treat him bad. Han has enough and speaks up.
(Skz are assholes here, im sorry...)
Tw: past trauma
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It was going on for weeks now. Stray kids found out about Hans little side and were disgusted by it. No one wanted to accept it, even when Jisung told them that it was because his parents abused him when he was a child.
When they saw him in little space, they forced him out of it and left him crying and panicking in his room alone. When his little stuff was laying on his bed, they threw it away.
They made fun of him whenever they could. Wouldn't allow him to eat with them anymore or even sleep in the same room as them.
And Jisung was on edge. He didn't know how much longer he could go under this pressure. He didn't know when the last time was when he slipped for a longer time that one hour, without being forced out of it.
"Jisung-aa, would you come and do a live with Minho and Felix?" A manager asked him today and who would Jisung to say no. That only meant with his band mates without comments on his little space.
"They will start in two hours, in their dorm." After that the manager disappeared again and left Jisung alone. The boy huffed and took out his favourite paci.
"Jisung, woukd you come dance with me?" Felix asked and opened the door without knocking. As he saw Jisung looking up at him with a terrified look in his eyes, he sighed.
He looked around, to see if anyone was there. Then he quickly slid in the room and locked the door behind him.
"Or can I meet Sungie?" Felix asked exited and kneeled down in front of Jisung.
Jisung furrowed his eyebrows. What was happening with Felix. The boy never looked at him, since his secret had been revealed, but he never made a harmful comment towards Jisung or joked about his little side.
"Why now?" Jisung whispered and lifted his head a bit, so he could look into Felix eyes.
"I always wanted to see your little side, but the other are such shitheads. I don't know why they hate it so much, but it's the cutest thing that I could ever image." Felix whispered back, hoping none of the members saw him sneak into Jisungs roo or heard them talk.
"But only short. We need to go live soon." Han mumbled and felt himself slip.
"Sungie?" Felix asked and took the older boys hand in his.
The little looked up to him and let a small smile creak out. Finally someone who was it forcing him out of little space.
"Pixie?" Jisung brabbled and played with the blond haired fingers.
"Do you want to show me your toys?" Jisung nodded and crawled over to his bed. He took out a box from underneath the bed and opened it.
Various toys and stuffed animals were laying there and Felix couldn't stop himself from chooing at the littles cuteness.
Jisung picks put some coloured pencils and a colour book with the topic family.
"That's chu an' me." Jisung pointed out. The picture showed a male person laying next to a little kid, which was colouring a book.
"Awww, do you want me to lay besides you?" Felix asked and Jisung patterned the floor next to him.
"Are the others also there?" Jisung shock his head.
"Bwig meanies! Don't deserve it!" He said and begann to colour the picture he showed to Felix earlier. The blonde sighed. He knew that the others didn't treat Jisung right. He hated it when he heard Jisung cry in the bathroom or how the others yelled at him, when they forced him out of little space.
After one and a half hour, Felix sat up. They slowly needed to go to the other dorm for the live.
"Sungie, could you try to come out of little space. We need to go to Minho Hyung, or he will be pissed again." Jisung nodded and started packing up his stuff, trying to get out of little space, but it didn't work.
He looked at Felix with sad eyes and shock his head.
"Come on Sungie. Can I do anything to help you get out of it." Jisung nodded and pointed towards the bathroom.
"Cold water." He whispered and curled himself up in a ball. It wasn't the best method to get him out, since it was very triggering to him, but better than yelling at him.
Felix stood up and drowned a towel in some cold water. He knew that it would trigger something in Jisung, so he didn't want to empty a bucked over his head.
"Sungie, I'm going to do it now." He warned, bevore he started to touch his face and the arms with cold water. Jisung hated it, it still tried his best to get out of his head space.
After two more minutes, he was finally out of the headspace. Felix put the towel away and helped Jisung with tiding up the room. Then they left and got to the other dorm.
Minho was already awaiting them.
"Could Jisung not find his stuffie?" Minho snickerd and let them in.
"Hyung, stop this nonsense! He didn't do anything and I bet he didn't even want his headspace!" Felix hissed and dragged Jisung to his room.
"Ignore what trash leaves his mouth. You are really cute as a little and if they didn't want to meet little Sungie they will miss out so much!" Felix assured him and poked his checks.
A few minutes later, everything was set up and they started the live. Everything went fine and Jisung tried his best to ignore the side comments that left Minhos mouth so quiet, that once he and Felix could hear them.
"Bet no one's going to love people who act like a three year old." Minho mumbled and continued to stare at his phone.
Now Jisung had enough.
"Are you serious now? You even dare to says these things to me while we are live." Jisung shouted and got up. Felix was quick to grab the phone and turn of the livestream.
"I don't know what you mean." Minho said and looked back at his phone.
"You think it funny to have a headspace you can't control? I didn't ask for my headspace and here I am. I didn't want you to find out, but the least I would have expected from you, is that you would accept it!" The door opened and Chan stuck his head in.
"What's going on?" He asked and stepped inside the room, followed by the other members.
"He is making comments about my headspace while we are live! I don't know what I ever did to you, that you treat me like this, but I can assure everyone that I never wanted to be a little! I never asked for this shit! I never wanted any of you to find out about it, but you could've at least accepted it and let me in peace. Bevore you found out, I managed it alone, without bothering anyone.
But when you find out you treat me like a disease!
You won't sleep in the same room as me, you don't let me eat when you eat. What's next? You won't let me breathe the same air as you?
I tried to explain to you, that I suffered from abuse in my childhood, but no one out of Felix seemed to care a little bit! You always came to me and forced me out of my headspace, leaving me panicking in my room. Or you throw my stuff away when you see it in my room, since you find it disgusting.
You don't know how scared I am to slip into headspace now. I'm as scared as in my teenage years. I really thought that this was my worst state, but now I would rather go back and let my parents abuse me, than let people treat me like shit who are like a family towards me!
I would rather let them kick and rape me again, than looking at one of your faces right now!" Jisung shouted at all of them.
Tears were leaving his eyes non stop and his sobbs were the only thing that was heard in the room.
The first to move, was Felix. He scooped Jisung up and left the room with him.
"Can you tell me everything that your parents did to you?" Felix asked, as he layed on a bed with him.
"They, they wanted a girl *sob* but go me... when I was two, it started *sob*. They slapped me or kicked me.. *sob* sometimes made me skip a *sob* meal.
When I was seven,*sob* they made some man come and *sob* rape me.. once a week for three months *sob*. After that, they sold me *sob*, but I escaped and landed here." Felix patted his head.
"I'm sorry for everything you needed to go through! I will stay with you, even if the others don't like it. I will never leave my sweet Sungie again in my life!" Felix promised gave Jisung a peck on the temple.
"Thanks for being there for me.." Jisung said and buried his head in Felix neck.
Suddenly they heard light foortsteps coming towards them. It was Changbin, who was standing at the door, looking guilty on the ground.
"What do you want?" Felix asked, letting the question come out a little harsh.
"I want to apologise for my behaviour... and explain a bit why we acted like such idiots... I know that it doesn't excuse any of what we did, but I want Jisung to know why we acted like that." Jisung nodded and pointed towards the couch infront of them.
"Sung, I'm really sorry for everything I've said or did towards you. I wasn't there on the day when the others found out or when you tried to tell them that you've been abused in your past.
I don't want to blame them on everything, but no one told me what was up with you, only that I should stay away from you.
After some days, I wanted to know more and found out that you were a little. I tried to talk to Minho why they were acting like this. He didn't told me anything, but Chan gave in. He explained, that if Jyp would've found out or any staff, they would kick you out, no matter how good you are." Jisungs mouth was wide open.
"So you want me to believe, that they treated me like shit because they didn't want me to get thrown out, instead of talking like normal humans?" Jisung snorted and Changbin nodded.
"They are also sorry, but can't face you now because they feel like shit, because of what they did to you." Changbin said and fiddled with his hands.
"But why didn't you know Lix?" Jisung asked and turned to the younger again.
"I didn't wanted to talk about you with them, so I problaby missed it, when they talked about this."
"Jisung-a..." Another voice suddenly said and the heads of the three snapped towards the entrance of the room. All of them were standing there, guilt plastered on their faces.
"I'm so sorry. I should've told you about this. I was so stupid!" Chan cried out and whipped his tears away.
"You could've just talked to me you idiots! I wouldn't chop anyone had of, but it a bit sad that you treated me like this and even forced me out of my headspace. Do you know how many panic attacks I had because of this? Me to, because I lost count!" The others kept their head low.
"How can we make it up to you?" Jeongin whispered and clung onto Hyunjins arm, not wanting to look at Jisung.
"Just treat me better. I don't want you to treat me like some sort of Prince, but at least respect it and don't force me out of my headspace, only if something important is going on.
I am willing to forgive everyone, because we all make mistakes and some people deserve a second chance. I see you as my better Familie and will forgive you, but I won't forget it!" They all nodded and finally dared to look up to Jisung, who was smiling at them and held his arms out.
"Group hug?" He asked and was a second later overran by his better family and engulfed in a comforting hug.
I don't know why I always make the backstories so angst and triggering. I try to avoid it in the next chap:)