I sit on the couch waiting patiently as he cleans up the class that I broke. I was so startled when he appeared in front of me that I almost screamed. He picked me up so fast that I could do nothing but hold onto the broadness of his shoulders as he carried me to the couch. When he release me I had to cross my legs at the tingling sensation that I got when he took all of my wait. He cleans up the mess in record time and comes back over to me.
I watch his face and see his lips about to move when suddenly his entire body freezes. His eyes change to slits as they darken and his dragon eyes come forth. I follow his gaze as he stares at me and see that he is looking at my legs. When I recall what I am wearing my entire body blushes as I curse myself. I was just coming down to grab a quick drink before heading off to bed and forgot to put on the robe.
My legs lay there completely bared to his gaze as I hear him swallow. Moving quickly I grab the pillow from the other end of the couch and try to cover them the best I can before his gaze can go all the way up my legs. The white panties I am wearing would definitely show the reaction that I have to being picked up by him.
A rough growl leaves his chest as he spins away from me. The sound travels straight to my core and I tighten the hold I have on the pillow. "Fuck, I can smell the scent of you so strongly that I can almost taste it. You need to leave now before I lose control" he states as he braces his hands against the wall in front of him.
I rise slowly from the couch as I watch his large body quiver. Seeing that he is fighting himself I slowly step around the couch preparing to exit the room. He whips around to face me when I almost trip over the edge of the couch from walking backward. "If you don't want me tasting what's between those legs of yours run. GO NOW!" he yells at me.
My eyes flicker down when something catches my attention to see that he is hard behind his robe. I can see the perfect outline of his large member through the fabric. Fear bristle through my body at the thought of him splitting me open with that. Another growl leaves him and what I see in his gaze scares me even more. I run from the room so fast that I have to catch myself twice as I climb up the stairs.
When I make it to my room I throw my back against the door as I breath hard. Fuck that was close. My hands fly to my chest feeling my heart race beneath my skin. I frown when I realize that it is no longer fear that I feel but excitement. I can't remember a time when anyone had a reaction to me like that. I could so clearly see his arousal that the very thought of touching it causes my nipples to harden.
We need to talk. I can't keep feeling like this and he needs to gain some control. I have already told him that he can't touch me in that way so the least that he could do is handle his reactions. Yanking my shirt over my head I quickly put on a bra and then my robe. I open the door slowly as I peek down the hall. My steps are slow as I look into his room. When I don't see him I make my way downstairs to the noise I hear coming from the kitchen.
When I walk in I stop in my tracks as I watch him toss back an amber liquid in a glass. There is no grimace as he swallows the liquid and immediately pours another. He swishes the fluid around in a glass before bringing it up to his lips to take a slow sip. I shuffle forward cautiously and his gaze meets mine over the rim of his glass.
His eyes travel slowly down my form as he eyes me heatedly. One would guess that he still pictures the image of me from the couch even though I am now fully covered. The sound of my throat clearing breaks him from his thoughts as he looks at me. "My control is at an end for today. Go back to your room" he says as he gives me his back.
This time the way that he act hurts me. I don't want him to turn away from me. There are things that need to be said. Not just about him and me but other things. There is just too much that I don't know. "I came in here because we need to talk" I state as I cross my arms. I plant my feet firmly on the floor. I won't leave this room until I get some answers.
"We can talk tomorrow, Tika. We will have many of them after all. At the moment, I cannot handle your presence so I am asking you to leave" he states gruffly. From the sound of his voice I can easily picture him speaking between clinched teeth even though he doesn't sound angry. Perhaps there is a chance that if I stand my ground I can answer some questions he may have too. After what I learned at my dinner with Maximus and Emily I need answers.
"Maximus says that you keep prisoners here but you don't help with the torture. Is that true?" I ask him bravely even though I am nervous.
He turns around looking at me quizzically as his eyes flash. He places his glass in the sink after draining the fluid. A sigh leaves his chest as he runs a hand through his hair. The motion distracts me because this is the first time I have seem it out of the confines of a rubber band. I prefer it down even though I shouldn't have a thought like that.
"No, it's not true. Not in the way that you think" he says as he grips the counter. I walk slowly toward the table and lean against it. I am know close enough to hear him better but still a few feet away. His eyes widen as I come closer to him. It looks as if he tries to back away but the counter is in his way.
"I don't know what that means. Torture is torture in its own form. There is no good way to torture" I reiterate to him as my voice deflates. The way he avoided answering the question gives me enough of an answer. I can't be with someone who is so willing to harm someone who cannot defend themselves. Prisoners are just people in this society who have all power taken from them. Granted that some of them deserve the treatment that they receive but there are some who have simply made mistakes. I am one of them.
"I would like to be place into the cabin where the other prisoners like myself reside" I tell him as I hold his gaze. As his eyes change the look on his face turns so deadly that I take a step back. Perhaps I shouldn't have thrown that reminder of me being a prisoner out there but he needed to hear it.
"You want so badly to be out of my presence that you will give me no more than a day. That is no chance at all for me to win your heart. I have been trying all day to find some sort of connection to you, to bond with you and you have pushed me away at every step. Can you even give me a valid reason why?" he ask as he comes closer. The anger he feels is evident in his voice.
"I have told you that I won't be with you in that way. The effort that you have made is futile. I refuse to be a friend to someone or with someone who would torture someone when they can't fight back. In my eyes it makes you nothing but a monster just like the ones I left. I didn't agree to stay here to go from being in one prison to another" I yell at him as I walk away.
I have in my mind to go to my room and pack up my things. I was going to wait until the morning to leave but screw it. I don't need this and I don't need him. Before I can even make it to the living room a gasp leaves my lips as my feet leave the floor. In seconds, my back is pressed against the wall as his full form crowds me. My heart pounds as I look into his piercing gaze.
"I AM NOT A MONSTER" he screams into my face. "I have worked my entire life to abide by one rule and that is to never harm another. What I do is not considered harm but it can be a form of torture to some. If you would take the courage to ask me instead of cowardly walking away again then you might learn something" he taunts as he looks at my face.
The words that leave his mouth piss me off. Shoving against him he releases me as he frowns. "I am not naïve or stupid. Since you brought it up we might as well talk about it. I didn't run away earlier because I can control my reactions instead of acting like a teenager with their first crush. You are the one that told me to run. If I were a coward I would have taken the easy way out after I killed my parents but no. I am still here fighting and taking my punishments for my misdeeds as they come" I tell him angrily.
I ball my hands into a fist because for the first time I want to hit someone. He has no right to say anything that he just said to me. He doesn't know me. I don't even know him. "You are behaving like a child. Adults talk things out when a problem arises instead of forming accusations. Since you are so willing to condemn me I might as well give you a reason to" He shouts as he comes back forward.
His arms wrap around my waist as he picks me up once more. I wiggle trying to get loose but my efforts get me nowhere. When I see what he has in mind pure panic fills me. Before I can stop him however he presses his lips to mine and the world around me disappears into a sea of gold.
A warm feeling fills my chest as tears spring to my eyes. A vision starts play out before me that causes me to sob. I watch as I see my parent at a time when we were all happy. We were all at the dinner table as sat in my dad's lap and he fed me from his plate. My mom laughs as I get food all over him but he doesn't seem to mind. Our smiles are so big in the moment that anyone could see our happiness.
The scene changes and its one I remember clearly. I stand on top of the Golden Gate bridge as William my boyfriend holds me in his arms. It was the moment that he told me that he loved me. We had only been talking for a few weeks at the time and I wanted so badly to believe his words.
Then it's the day that I left my parents' house when I heard their conversation with the maid. I watch as I walk away from them and go to William. I watch my first sexual encounter and remember how short it lasted. How I believed he loved me more. I see myself drinking at the party and then going to find him. Only when I did, he hadn't even waited a few hours but already had someone else under him. I ran away as my parents called me for a ride.
The car swerves on the road as tears continue to blur my gaze. My father sits next to me in the front as he scolds me for my actions. The sound of my mother's voice as she tells me how much they love me breaks my heart all over again. Turning my eyes back to the road as I call them both liars I was too late. The world shines bright and the gold river flows bringing me back to the real world as I pull my lips away from his with a gasp.
I push away from him as sobs leave my chest and I run. I run away from what he showed me. What he made me feel. My heart hurts so much more when I relived it. I was able to notice things that I haven't noticed before and my guilt increases. It wasn't just one decision that brought me to this point but a series of bad ones. Every single regret that I have in my life is all my fault. I deserve to be alone because of all the damage that I caused. I deserve to die alone to because I killed the most precious thing I ever had.