Together With You

Chapter 36 - Ocean

Meredith looks at me like I'm a puzzle to solve.

"Say something Mer!" I whisper.

She exhales "I want you to honest with me okay"

I nod.

"Do you like Drew? As in more than friends slash brother like you always told us?"

I bite my lower lip and nod.

"Okay. And why do you have to push him?"

I lean back. "I don't know Mer. I... I have to admit that my family succeeds in making me afraid with commitment, love and family" I say truthfully.

"You mean your dad?"

"Yeah. You know his um.. history?"

"I know. Um well... he tried to invite me to his place once" Meredith bites her lip.

"Oh my God" I cover my face. Ashamed of my dad.

"Hey nothing happened between me and your dad okay?" She chuckles.

"I know. But still.." I shake my head.

"Okay look. I'm aware of your family background, not only from your dad but Ian told me too when I told him I was so confused with you and Dean. You two have the same dad but different last name, so he told me about.. um.. your family drama" she says and I nod. My family drama isn't a secret.

"Look I don't want to talk about your family drama, okay. What I want to tell you is, I do have some issues with my past. But Ian managed to pull me and make me realize that not every love story has to be fucked up like the old ones"

I nod. "I know. I'm trying to believe in that too Mer. Really. Especially after I saw what you have with Christian and Ethan with Mads. It makes me think to open my mind about any possibilities"

"That's good," she smiles.

"But... everything happened so fast. I was just trying my best to open myself in relationship, suddenly I have to marry Drew to secure Char's future"

"I know" she squeezes my hand "you are under a lot of pressure right now"

"Yeah and worse, I just know I have this anxiety about family. I mean whenever Drew is trying to show me he is a family man, my anxiety spikes up. It makes me feel..."

"Insecure"

I nod miserably. "And now.. I think Drew is fed up with me"

"Excuse me?"

"He was avoiding me this past week, Mer. And suddenly he went to New York. I don't want to assume anything but he was with a woman. And this is not the first time"

"Wait Ocean. Stop right there. What did you just say?"

I take out my phone and play the voice message from Drew. "Did you hear that?"

"Um yeah but it could be anyone. Maybe her secretary, Riley, or maybe.. I don't know Ocean but it could be anyone" Meredith says.

"I know but it could be someone too. You know... this is no the first time Drew went to NY out of sudden"

She narrows her eyes "what do you mean?"

So I told her about NY before this when Drew said he wanted to see his dad but his dad wasn't in NY.

"I know it will sound like I'm in Drew's team. But.. I'm sure there is a reason for everything, Ocean. Look... Drew and you... you two were always saying that you guys are friends, but everyone knew that you two feel more than friends"