Open up (18+ Only)

Chapter 37

Craig

To be honest, I just get fucked up to see another person with her especially Matt. I know I've made my mistakes and regret really letting her go but I think I'll have a constant reminder that I left her. I went out with the kids and ended up locking her inside to be sure that she's safe but I found the door slightly open and my phone was already on speed dial but as I was dragging my feet with the kids both in my hands I could hear voices and maybe thought there was another spare key but to find Matt there was another story. I know that I was the one that made them meet but I never thought that they would be this close and our group is still there but I distanced myself after i had children and meet with them today and was thinking about telling Luna but No maybe it's not a good idea at all, I don't thinks it's a good idea now and well Matt left like cut ties with everyone and Jessica said it was because of Luna I didn't believe it but now, it's a different story now.

"Why? Why are you here?" I questioned Matt after he hang up and was glad Luna wasn't there "I told you to stay the fuck away" I half shouted through my frustration

"I told you I won't, Luna will decide for herself" he said while walking up to me and stopped a few steps "I was here when you fucked up and that's what you used to fucking things up"

"So you waiting for me to fuck up so that you would step in? I asked and my anger was building up

"No. Not step in but clean the huge mess you make after fucking up every time" he said more calm than I expected

Words can kill you, his words were like a sharp knife right on my heart "I'll fix every mess I make and I don't need you here" I said and I cut him before he could even speak "how did you even get in?" I half shouted and Luna came in and decide to just keep quite and I saw him wave the key before leaving, so he has his own pair and I needed to calm down and I just fall asleep and escape everything.

"We have to talk, something I just have to get it out of my chest" I said immediately as she walks the bedroom door and the sleeping wasn't helping because I just wanted to cry like the last time when she left and this is how it feels

"What's up?" She responded asking and while sitting on the edge on the bed

"You and Matt?" I asked and she said nothing because I wasn't done "i don't like what's happening between you guys and it's not like I'm jealous but I saw the videos and.... You guys seem so close and she makes you happy more than I do to have his own set" I said not knowing how to put my emotions into words

"You have to stop comparing yourself to Matt.."

"But you make me want to every time" I cut her off and she was breathing loudly

"No, you can't expect me to keep quiet when you start talking about him Craig and we grew pretty close and I won't lose him, I can't afford to lose him"

"That's not what..." She cut me off

"Let me finish please" and could see sadness and pain in her eyes and one hand was holding her abdominal and I nodded but she took a few minutes getting the pain to ease a bit and I wish I could take it away

"You were the one who left me Craig. Do you know the pain I felt after losing you? Spending sleepless nights thinking you would call or maybe I wasn't good enough for everyone, do you? When everyone turned their back on me and you were the last person I thought would give up on me so easily. Do you know how it feels to feel pain you aren't even able to control? Both physically and emotionally, do you? I learned to love myself more then anyone but I could feel the void you left and sometimes feel I've moved on and hits harder that No he left you?" Tears were streaming down her face and she held her hand stopping me "when you were gone and me starving myself to death because of everything Matt was there and he would travel each week just to keep checking up on me. When I called you each night but I knew you blocked me till the day I bought a new sim card but what hurts more is that I knew them by heart. Matt was always there holding my hand for the check up, he made time and was able to choose me over her girlfriend. He was there while you weren't " I never knew I had hurt her this much and I just went to embrace her into a hug and never let go like the time I let go.

"I'm sorry" was all the words that came out my mouth and brushed her back until she was more better and laughed a bit after crying and I swear I'm in love with a psycho and we ended up sleeping with her head on my chest