Under the spotlight

Chapter 12: Lust

I was in the changing room with the other girls. I had chosen a beautiful gold Tutu, it matched Matthew's leotard. My hair was up in two braids, not one strand was hanging out. The blonde of it with my dress looked neat.

"Have you seen Sebastian?" Maia entered and asked the rest of us with a panicked voice. The girls shook their heads. "Agnes?"

"No, I'm sorry," She sat down and pinched the bridge in her nose. I went to her side and stroked her hair. "Don't panic, he'll be here, I'm sure,"

"How can you be so sure?" She had som tears in her eyes restrained.

"He's professional and I don't think he wants to lose this opportunity," I smiled and she dried her tears. "Now, you need to brush your hair,"

She sat straighter and I brushed her long hair. When it was all knots free I started to braid it down. After three minutes we were done and her hair was looking stunning.

"You are done," I said padding her shoulders.

"Thank you so much, for real," She smiled and I grinned back.

Her friends had already left to perform and I was starting to feel more nervous. I didn't want to leave Maia but at the same time I really needed to get backstage with my partner.

"Go! it's your turn next," She signaled the door and I giggled before running upstairs.

(...)

Matthew and I were waiting backstage. We were going to dance on the second number, that meant we followed Tessa and Sophie. I was trying to recall the steps in my head, shaking my head in the air and looking for Matthew's reassurance. Once in a while he would try to make me stay still but it never worked.

The two girls piece was very interesting. I had thought they would interpret a lesbian thing or so but it actually was a pretty different concept. In the choreography they were fighting for someone by showing off their moves and grace. It was cool but it didn't scream lustful.

I could sense the music coming to an end and my nerves grew even bigger than before. Matthew's chest was pressed hard on my back which made me more unsettled.

"Ready?" He whispered and I shook my head.

The lights went off, signaling us to enter the stage. Holding his hand we both stayed in the position for the beginning. "I feel like I'm drowning" from two feet started playing and I went on pointe. Matthew made me twirl and I fell in his hands.

Until now I hadn't payed attention on the viewers, however I was surprised to see Dominique and Nikolai sitting in one of the middle lines. They were probably there for Sebastian but it was comforting as well.

I didn't have time to look more over there because I needed to keep the choreography going. I tried to picture everything, knowing that there wasn't lust between us, I didn't like him. I closed my eyes for a second and imagined Sebastian standing instead of Matthew. 

It was easier to connect with the dance that way. I was starting to feel heated with all the steps and swirls and jumps. Next I had to lean down and Matthew was going to jump over me, then grab my hands and hug me. It was the climax and my favorite part.

We did the difficult jump and landed perfectly, both of us hiding a smirk to keep acting. I felt his arms around me, helping move across the stage, feeling like I was in the right place. It felt right to be there, to dance and show everyone I was able to do it.

Of course Katarina's face wasn't fully visible from here but it seemed obvious that she was interested staring at everything we did. Sometimes I would catch her writing on her notebook, maybe comments about our performance.