The last enemy

Chapter 40: Mione's feelings

I place my book back on the shelf as Hermione is doing the same beside me. She takes a moment to scribble something down on a parchment than goes back to putting the books in there rightful places. I know she has been feeling guilty about confunding McLaggen... mostly because he is with us in Slughorn's favourites.

There is still something I don't understand; why did she care that much if Ron didn't make it on the team? I mean, yeah, he would have been really sad and probably pissed at Harry... but I do not think she did it so that he would be more pleasant to be around. I think she did it to make him happy.

Even if she did it to make him happy, it still doesn't explain why she would go against all the rules she stood up for just so that her friend's mood would be better. I'm sure there is something I'm missing.

I look over my shoulder and see that she is writing on her piece of parchment again. I narrow my eyes, trying to see what she is writing. Something about the charm accio.

- Hermione, what are you doing?

I whisper to her. Her head jerks up and she looks at me.

- Just taking a few notes for Ron's essay.
- Ron, huh?

She quickly puts her hair over her face but before she does, I can clearly see that she is blushing.

- Will you finally tell me why you blush each time his name is mentioned or when he gives you a compli — oh.

I say as I realize the answer to this question is very obvious. Hermione likes Ron! I grin.

- Oh. My. God. Mione, do you?
- What? Me? No...pfff...I would never...what are you —

I give her a knowing look and she sighs.

- Fine, I don't know!
- Would you mind elaborating on that answer, please?
- Well, I act weirdly when he's there and it's so strange! Also, he is sometimes really nice but then he's annoying and I want to hex him!
- Classic case of I don't want to admit it to myself. You like him, Hermione! You could be getting a boyfriend!

I squeal and she shushes me.

- Oh, shush! We are in a library! And you don't know that I like him for sure, now, do you?
- I like to think that I have some experience in that since, you know, Theo and I were a thing and —

My smiles falls. I talked about Theo as if he was still alive. I turn my head back to the books I was arranging and sit down on a chair. Hermione sits beside me and puts her head on my shoulder.

- Maybe that's not what you want to hear right now but...I talked with him, when you were attacked by Voldemort and I saw that...he was a good guy. He made you happy.

No, that was not what I wanted to hear at all. I don't really want to be reminded of the time where I wanted to join my parents on the other side and had to lie, still to this day, to my friends about it...But at the same time, I'm happy that she approved of Theo. A slight smile creeps on my lips.

I feel a burning pain making its way in my heart and I know this felling all too well. It's the feeling that I get when I think of him. A tear escapes my eye and I wipe it off before anyone other than my best friend can see it.

- El, he died a hero. We won't forget what Sirius and him did that day. We won't forget what they died for.
- Yeah, I know...it's just that — it's not going away.
- What isn't?
- The pain. I forget about it for a while and then it just comes back, stabbing me in the chest.