The Moon in her Broken Home (Broken Series #1)

Fractum 45

Broken 45: Fianćee

My Travis Clarkson Montealegre is true to his words. He stood up to his words the moment he entered our room while I was crying miserably. He stood by his words that if I’ll bleed, he’ll bleed with me. If I bleed, he’ll be there with me. now that I am bleeding, hes here with me.

“I have experienced your thick and unbreakable façade. I have come to realize long ago that you don’t want anyone else but the Laudes to be truthful of…” marahan niyang simula.

Nanatili lang akong tahimik. Puno pa rin ng luha ang mga mata ko pero unti-unti nang kumakalma ang paghikbi ko.

I was never that open if it was not the Laudes. I have been open to my mother when I was a teenager, once, twice, thrice, more than a hundred times but she never listened and she did not even want to help.

Luxen and I became best of friends because of his talkative self and I only as a listener. Luxen and I’s friendship goes the same with Xanthine and I. They’re both my suitors before they became my bestfriend.

Morene and Felcity are the only girl friends I have and they sticked with me because I was so alone and we both liked each others company.

To Clarkson, I have opened every single happy and hurt experiences I had.

“Namimili ka ng pagkakatiwalaan dahil alam mong maraming tao sa mundo ang pwedeng tumalikod sa iyo. You don’t want anyone to understand you because you know that even when they try, they’ll never understand you,” mahina at malambot ang boses niyang sabi.

He continued caressing my hair as he speaks. Hindi man lang lumuluwag ang yakap niy sa akin kahit kalmado na ang pananalita niya.

It’s a familiar feeling. It was a year ago when I was crying so hard, here too, while I was the one who narrated my traumatic experiences to him and he only listened. Now, I am crying softly, listening to his narration of how he is still loving me after all the years of us with or without each other.

“Sweetheart, I have experienced your façade, I have caught you in your hiding, I realized why you were giving yourself a thick wall for everyone, I understood you when no one else did,” he continued with his narration.

Akala ko, ganoon na ako kagaling sa pagkakaroon ng façade ko. If he saw the inner me with my thick façade, my façade must’ve been not that thick. Or Clarkson is such an expert to me that he sees everything that others will never see.

“Others will not understand you the way I did because I have seen you as a whole, as a piece, broken and shattered, and how you became the best even in the fact that you are broken,” he said softly.

Bumuhos lalo ang mga luha ko nang sinabi niya iyon. Mas idinikit ko ang sarili ko sa kaniya. I held on to him like he’s the sanity I never had but I never want to lose not that I do have him.

“Matagal na kitang kilala. Matagal ko nang nakabisado ang buong pagkatao mo. I already know who you are, and you don’t have to hide yourself from me anymore,” he said seriously.

“It was… it was… it was just a nightmare…” humahagulgol at naghahabol hininga kong sagot.

I felt him nod. It was a small part of something big but I hope that he understood it. I cried more in his chest until I could breathe properly again. Clarkson took it as a sign.

“I loved you more with your pains, tears, and past. I have fallen badly in love with the broken Agape Sanguine Laude,” he said sweetly and softly.

Napaurong ako ng bahagya sa pagkakayakap niya sa akin. Tiningala ko siya at tumitig ako sa mga mata niya. I saw his expressive pitch black eyes with a shade of my second name, marking how hurtful for him to see how hurt I am right now, too.

“I’ll continue to fall in love as I heal and mend you from the broken past that you have been through,” he softly said in a low voice.

It was not an easy process. All I know now is that Clarkson has been healing me… from the pain and the traumas I have been trough. I am healing, and I started to heal the moment I opened up to him. I am helaing with his help, and I will continue to heal from the traumas I have been living with all my life with him now in my life.

I slept with a heavy heart and I woke up with a light heart. It’s the same feeling a year ago when I opened up to him. It’s the airy feeling of waking up in his arms. Only that now, he’s the first one to be awake.

Napangiti siya nang makitang nagmulat na ako ng mata. He was looking down at me while seriously caressing my hair. It made me sleepier but I need to be awake now.

Ngumiti ako sa kaniya at sinubukang ibaangon ang sarili pero mabilis niya akong nakontrol. He caressed my hair before placing a soft kiss on my lips. I smiled in between his kissed before I smiled at him back.

“I have to go to work,” sabi ko agad pagkaupo.

Naihilamos ko ang palad ko sa mukha ko. Kinusot ko ang isang mataa ko habang pinapanood na umangat si Clarkson. He smiled at me softly.

“It’s our rest day,” he said, “Why don’t we file a leave? Umuwi muna tayo saglit sa Batangas or take a vacation before,” aniyaya niya.

Napaawang ang labi ko. If it will be the case, it will be the first time we’ll go home in Batangas together. Palagi ay magkahiwalay kami sa pagpunta roon dahil isang gabi lang naman nagtatagal doon at babalik na rito para sa trabaho. If we file a leave, we’ll go home together.

Sa huli, tumango ako. His smile grew wider as he held my hand.

“Will a week half a month be okay?” I asked.

I think I can file a leave on my residency. It will be the first time in three years.

Tumango rin siya. I watched his pink lips part for an answer, “More than enough,” he answered enthusiastically.

I filed a leave that day too. Clarkson already did so he didn’t have to now. his plan was indefinite at first but now is definitely definite.

“Boracay?” I asked.

Iniabot niya kasi ang cellphone niya sa akin at may nakabukas na website tungkol sa boracay. I looked at him with curous eys as I chew my dinner for tonight.

“Let’s book a flight,” he suggested, “Or I’ll fly you there,” dagdag suhestyon niya.

Halos maubo ako sa sinabi niya. Inabutan niya ako ng tubig habang naglalaro ang ngisi sa labi niya.

“I-I’m not ready to ride a plane yet!” singhal ko nang makainom na ng tubig. “Hindi pa ako nakakasakay ng eroplano buong buhay ko. Baka Mamatay ako sa langit. The hell. Hindi pa ako ganap na doctor mamamatay na ako—shit!” singhal ko sa kaniya nang hulihin niya ag nakaangat na siko ko.

“Easy there, sweetheart,” nakangiting balik niya.

Ibinaba niya ang baso ko sa table.

Ngumisi siya muli sa akin, “I’ll fly you to safety,” sagot niya.

“Yes, I’m sure,” balik ko sa kaniya.

I smiled at him as I roll my eyes.

Pinindot ko ang cellphone niya. In-exit ko ang tab na nakabukas at nag-search ako ng bago. I scrolled down his phone when I saw the right article. Ipinatong ko iyon sa table, sakto lang para makita naming dalawa ang laman ng article. Itinukod ko ang siko ko sa table at pinanood ko ang reaction niya.

Wala naman siyang reaksyon. Nakangiti lang siya gamit ang labi niya habang binabasa ang nakasulat sa article.

“Okay. Ferry it is,” nakangiting sagot niya sa akin.

Ang dali talagang kausap nito.

We continued eating. Hinayaan ko siyang ibaba ang laman ng article dahil medyo mahaba iyon.

“Isn’t that crowded?” tanong niya nang mapagtanto.

Umiling ako, “It’s the middle of August. Wala masyadong nagbabakasyon. Siguro marami pa ring tao pero hindi naman ganoon ka-crowded,” sagot ko.

Tinuro ko ang part na mayroong nakasulat na pwedeng suite room ang kunin namin. It’s a private room in the ferry with its own private showers and toilets. Medyo mahal ang kwarto pero ayos lang iyon sa akin dahil may sinsweldo naman ako. It will be okay for Clarkson, too. He can afford a plane ticket, what more of a private room in a ferry.

Tumango siya, “We’ll go there tomorrow. I’ll drive us to Batangas port and I’ll let Shaun get my car for me. We’ll take the night sail for you to take a rest before the whole week vacation. You like the night, too,” he informed softly.

I smiled at him. It’s settled then.

Iyon nga ang ginawa namin. Tanghali pa lang noong umalis kami papunta sa Batangas port. Tulog lang ako buong byahe dahil napuyat ako kagabi sa ka-excited-an dahil hindi pa ako nakakasakay sa barko.

Nagulo ko na at lahat lath si Clarkson kagabi ay maingay at hyper pa rin ako sa ka-excited-an. Maaga pa rin namang nagising si Clakrson kasi bumili siya ng mga panggamot sa akin kung sakaling may motion sickness din ako sa barko.

Shaun is friendly. Magkahawig sila ni Clarkson pero hindi maikakailang mas maputi si Clarkson.

We settled on the ferry around 8:30 PM. Nine PM pa ang usad ng barko. Clarkson is ready with all my meds while I am having fun watching the nightsky already.

Six AM ang dating namin sa Caticlan jetty port. Naka-book na kami ng hotel sa bora kaya ayos na kami roon. Then, we’ll pay the fees and board to an oyster ferry to Boracay. After that to the hotel already. Lastly, Boracay!

Gumalaw na rin ang barko nang makababa na kami. Hinila ako ni Clarkson papunta sa kung saan. Hinayaan ko siyang hilahin ako ng marahan habang todo lingon ako sa kada bintanang madaraanan namin dahil sa pagkamangha ko na na sa dagat na natatanaw ko na naliliwanagan lang ng magandang buwan.

Clarkson and I entered a café inside the ferry. Hinayaan ako ni Clarkson na mamasyal sa loob ng café habang pumipila siya para bumili. Alam naman niyang hindi ako lalayo dahil tanaw lang sa bintana ang gusto ko.

Habang naglalakad, nakakita ako ng isang pamilyar na mukha. Namataan niya rin ako at napangiti siya sa akin. He’s holding a woman’s hand and that woman is hiding behind his back.

“Luxen!” bati ko.

Ngimiti siya lalo sa akin. nilingon niya ang babae sa likod niya at may sinabi siya roon na hindi ko narinig. Bumaling ulit si Luxen sa akin at marahan siyang lumapit, hawak pa rin ang kamay noong babae.

“Sang! Now we see each other when we don’t plan it,” natatawa niyang sabi.

“Kaya nga. I’m with my boyfriend. Ang ganda ng kasama mo. Girlfriend? Hi,” bati ko roon sa babae.

Ngumiti siya sa akin pero nagtago rin siya sa likod ni Luxen. Luxen watched the girl before he smiled back at me, “She’s my fiancée. Mahiyain nga lang,” kwento niya.

Lumawak ang ngiti ko roon. Umurong kami sa gilid dahil may dumaan.

“Congrats! Invited ako sa kasal, ha, bestfriend?” I said to him with an excited smile.

Tumango siya agad. He glanced at the girl then back at me, “Of course. Sasabihin ko na rin dapat sa iyo. Mahiyain pa nga lang talaga siya,” kwento niya at sinulyapan ulit ang babaeng nagtatago sa likod niya.

Luxen bid goodbye after a short series of chitchatting. Nagpaalam na rin sila dahil gusto raw ng kape ng girlfriend niya. Similarities.

Umupo ako sa isang upuan na kaharap ng malaking glass window. Pumangalumbaba ako roon habang nangingiti ng kaunti. Hindi pa ako nagtatagal roon, may naupo na agad sa tabi ko. Umayos ako ng upo at napangiti lalo dahil akala ko si Clarkson na pero isa na namang pamilyar na babae ang bumungad sa akin.

Bumagsak man ang ngiti ko ng kaunti ay ibinalik ko iyon para mangitian ng maayos si Iris. She watched my lips curve for a smile. Hindi man lang siya ngumiti sa akin.

“Hello, Iris,” bati ko sa kaniya.

“Hello…” mahina niyang bati, hindi pa rin napapangiti man lang.

“Kumusta ka? I saw Luxen earlier. With his fiancée. I think they’re on the line now,” kwento ko tungkol sa kapwa kaklase naming nakapila sa linya.

Tumango siya. Lumingon siya sa harap na view namin at sumandal siya sa upuan.

“I know. I followed them…” she said.

Naiangat ko ang dalawang kilay ko roon, nagtatanong peo hindi ko na isinaliota. I waited for her to conitinue her words.

“I’m not here to exchange greetings with you. Hindi ko sinasadyang makita ka rito pero sinasadya kong sundan si Luxen at ang girlfriend niya. Nakita kita habang sinusundan sila at naisip ko nang lapitan ka. I’m actually here to give you an apology,” she confessed.

Naitaglid ko ang ulo ko ng bahagya, “For what?” I asked.

Bumuntong hininga siya. Tumungo siya bago bumaling sa akin ng may kalmadong mukha, “Ako ang nagsumbong at nagpadala ng mga litrato niyo ni Luxen sa Mama mo. I just… I… I want to say sorry for what I did,” marahan niyang sabi.

Napawang ang labi ko roon at bahagyang napakunot ang noo ko. I thought about who told my mother the fake news before but it didn’t cross my mind that much. now that she confessed, I suddenly feel… offended.

“I considered you my friend, Iris. You are the closest person who I can call a friend back in highschool. I even envied you for the close to perfect family you have but to hurt you never crossed my mind…” I said to her lghtly.

Saglit akong napatigil roon. Bukod sa offended at disappointed na pakiramdam ko, wala ng iba. Wala akong maramdamang galit o pagkairita. I gave it some thoughs.

Maybe because I am healing. I am already at the verge of being healed. I already cried about the issue so much that I don’t want to cry anymore. I can’t cry anymore. Kahit siya pa ang panimula ng dagdag kasakitang nangyari sa akin noon, siguro dahil tinatapos ko na rin ang yugtong iyon ng buhay ko, I don’t want to be angry. I don’t want to hate. I can’t anymore.

“Sorry. Sorry.” Agap niya, “I love Luxen so bad. Hinabol ko siya. I hated you because you had his attention and love. Lahat ng pagmamahal na sa akin niya ibinibigay noon, bigla niyang ibinigay sa iyo. Pakiramdam ko yung dapat na akin, napunta sa iyo. Kahit hiwalay na kami noong nagkagusto siya sa iyo,” her voice broke at the end.

Hinayaan ko siya. Some of her tears were falling and she brushed it off immediately but she did not stop on narrating.

“It was a useless chase. Matalino ka, maganda, maraming talento, walang wala ako sa iyo. I hated you more bacuse I knew I could never have everything you possess…” naiiling na sabi niya.

“It’s still a useless and endless chase. I have been chasing him since highschool. Sobrang walang kwenta ng paghahabol ko sa kaniya kasi hindi rin naman pala siya mapapasa akin...” pagpatuloy niya pa.

“Nakita mo n-naman. He’s getting married to someone else. Not to me. I was his first love but I’ll never be the last because he’s getting married to the woman he loves now. And it’s not me,” umiiyak na sabi niya.

“Nasayang lang ang buong buhay kong paghahabol sa kaniya kasi ikakasal naman na siya sa iba. It was such a useless chase,” she confessed further.

“Kaya gusto ko sanang mag-sorry sa iyo. I know I hated you not only because Luxen loved you but also because of my insecurities. Karma ko siguro ang sakit na natatamo ko mula kay Luxen dahil nanakit din ako ng isang mabuting tao dahil sa sobrang pagmamahal ko sa kaniya…” nanghihinang sabi niya.

“I’m so sorry, Sanguine. I hope you live a prosperous life,” huli niyang sabi bago umiiyak na tumayo at umalis.

She didn’t give me a chance to speak. Pinanood ko na lang siyang umalis at dahil pinapalis niya ang sunod-sunod niyang luha, may nakabanggaan siya. Napaawang ang labi ko nang makitang ang fiancée ni Luxen ang nabangga niya. Tinakluban niya na lang ang buong mukha niya bago patuloy na tumakbo paalis.

Lumingon ako sa kaliwa ko nang may umupo. Pinanood ko si Clarkson na ibinababa ang isang lalagyan ng frappucino sa harap ko.

“Kanina ka pa diyan? Did you hear our conversation?” I asked him.

Although, if he didn’t hear the conversation, I’d still narrate it to him.

Tinusok niya ang straw sa frappe ko. Inilapit niya iyon sa akin bago niya ako binalingan.

“I heard. Ganoon din ang ginawa ni Mila sa iyo noon,” seryosong sabi niya.

“Mila?” wala sa sarili kong tanong.

Bahagyang naitigalid ko ang ulo ko. Napakurap ako nang maalala si Mila.

“Ah! My friend in senior highschool,” balik ko agad nang maalala.

“Hindi pala iyon ang unang beses na binaliktad ka ng kaibigan mo. I thought I already protected you from those who tried to break you before,” kwento niya.

Hinayaan ko siyang magkwento. Sumimsim ako sa frappe habang pinapanood ko siya sa pagkekwento niya.

“Nagsumbong sa Papa mo si Mila tungkol sa ating dalawa. Back in your senior highschool days,” kwento niya pa.

“Eh, wala namang tayo noon,” sagot ko agad, “There wasn’t anything going on between us,” I said innocently as I shake my head.

“Wala rin namang kayo ni Luxen noon,” sagot niya agad, medyo arogante.

“That was my mother with the issue of Luxen. Bakit, naniwala ba si Papa kay Mila?” balik ko agad.

Ngumisi lang siya sa akin at umiling, nagsu-surrender na. I sipped on my frapped again.

“There wasn’t something between us back then. Now, there is. Walang tayo noon pero may tayo ngayon,” he fired back making me laugh a bit at him.