Ripple | ✔ (Old Story)

Chapter 66

The next day followed and went by like a flash, maybe for me it did. I didn't get an ounce of sleep and by the time I had felt drowsy, Julia knocked on my door inviting me to the breakfast she had brought in.

The thoughts of my conversation with Chase last night was the only thing that really kept me occupied. Throughout the day, the activities were exciting, though for me they weren't. I didn't have the energy to even dress up or work with them, that when they played beach volleyball, I just did my own little stroll. Letting my mind rest for the time being.

I tried my hardest not to think about him or the things that were said but it was hard when he was just a few feet away at every given minute and when he isn't, my mind would still go back to him.

Christian would come by or Julia and they would check on me, or try to convince me to go with them but they didn't push when I said no. They must've noticed that things haven't really been all that good for me today and I'm grateful that they didn't just push it.

Late afternoon finally fell, and I was grateful when everyone decided to go to a bar on the public beach. Although everyone, almost everyone tried to convince me to come, even Court, I knew better than to say yes. I did my best faking a headache and they all just followed along, despite Courtney cursing towards me but that was the least of my concerns.

When they had left, I didn't see Chase with them but Ethan had told me he went somewhere probably to get some snacks to bring home for the trip back tonight. I had told Julia and Christian how it was a bad idea if they drank but Christian promised that he wouldn't so I let them. I was like a mother and a child all at once.

Having this huge mansion and beach all to myself was absolutely intimidating but I didn't wanna stay in anyway. I wanted to just watch the ocean, stay there and be calm even just for a few minutes.

The waves today we're much stronger than they were yesterday so I decided to climb on one of the big rocks just so when the wave hit, I would feel it vibrate through my feet. The wind was just as warm but much stronger and the beautiful sunset was beginning. I watched the colours carefully, maybe hoping that it would be able to erase anything that happened for the past two months. Erase the images of tattoos and piercings from my mind and clean me off of anything.

If only it can do that. If only the waves could change everything, give me a better canvas to paint on but no, all it can do for me is drown out the screams that threaten to get out.

I want him out of my mind, I wanna forget him, I wanna stop hurting for him but I can't. It's like going into the woods, too far you got so lost. Only this time, I did know a way out, and I could get myself out but I'm just not letting myself. Why? Because a part of me still believes that there is something at the other end. But is there anything at all?

All this fighting and crying and then kissing pulled me further in and I got lost maybe even stung? All the pain and hopelessness just fueled everything until it exploded right in my face and I wanna let it go, I do but it's like I can't.

The sky turned a shy tint of red as I let a tear slip, closing my eyes and just grounding myself once again.

Silently breathing, I feel a mellow presence carefully sit beside me, soft fabric caressing my bare arms and sending goosebumps through my body but I dare not look.

"Thought you were scared of the ocean?"
Now realizing who it was, I still kept my eyes tightly closed, letting my tears flow like a river.

"I am. Not as much as I'm scared of you." I trembled, taking one shaky breath in. Even though my eyes are closed, I could still feel his gaze burning right through me.