블랙 스완 - BLACK SWAN
in which bts has an eighth female member
✎... ❝ teamwork makes the dream work ❞
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"come in!" she heard a very faint shout from the other side, presuming she heard correctly, she slowly opened the door only to be met with anothe...
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✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
february 30, 2013
it was announced by bang sihyuk that the band would be debuting that year in june, which meant the tension only heightened within the company.
it was stressful for everyone. with the planning of concepts for their official music video, the editing and reviewing of their songs for their debut album, the nonstop practicing of dancing and vocal training, the polishing of the choreographs they'd learned, it was all in all stressful for everyone.
jisun hadn't been able to sleep properly for the past few weeks, the past few days it's been nothing but a max of 2 hours of sleep before she was awoken; otherwise she'd get no sleep at all, suffering from insomnia and her loud thoughts being the culprit, stealing her precious sleep right from underneath her.
it's been bothering her a lot recently, her hearing deficiency. it'd been keeping her up because she was afraid, afraid that she wouldn't be able to hear somebody coming near her, ready to attack her unbeknownst to her, while she was sleeping or working in her small dorm and would get hurt, again. she blamed it on her paranoia and the nightmares she'd been getting for a while now. also because of the fact that when she was attacked in the dance studio only weeks ago. she didn't hear jaein come up behind her and she blamed herself for not having heard him.. she was experiencing ptsd and insomnia and yet she didn't have a clue.
jisun had been apart of the band for nine-going-on-ten months now and she was very slowly getting a bit closer to the guys and at an even slower pace, opening up to them. there was a part of her where she still couldn't let herself fully trust them, and she was afraid to trust them and open up to the seven because if she did, she knew she'd get attached, and if she got attached and something happened to them, she wouldn't know what she'd do with herself.
that was another thing that seemed to be keeping the girl up at night as well.
'quiet on the outside, but screaming on the inside.' jisun wrote in her father's old, jagged journal that she'd usually write random phrases or quotes in. whatever was on her mind really.
as she couldn't sleep, she'd gone out and sat at the kitchen island of her tiny dorm she lived in by herself.
she continued scribbling in the journal, writing out random short poems that came to mind, some phrases that could potentially be used in future songs.
it's a little crazy how the mind can work in miles and the creativity can flow. the most troubled seem the most intelligent.
