Sick little games

Chapter 29

I leave it at least two minutes before I follow him out. I knock lightly on the door and call his name, I don't get an answer but I know he can hear me. "I'm sorry ok? I didn't mean it that way." I slouch against his door and allow my head to fall back, knocking for me again.

"Why are you getting so mad over something so silly?"

A loud bang on the door causes me to jump. "something so silly? just fuck off JJ." I stand to my feet as the words come through the door. "I've said I'm sorry, what else can I do?" I plead with him. "Fuck off, I did just say that." I sigh as his footsteps become quieter, suggesting he has left me.

I get up off the ground and go back inside, at this point I am sure the neighbours have their ears pinned to their doors.

***

A few days pass and all I can think about is Spencer. He still hasn't spoken to me since the other day and there's no way I'm going round there to embarrass myself again.

We're now off work properly for Christmas and I decide to visit Emily with a strong hope I might accidentally bump into Spencer.

***

"Hey stranger!" Emily greets me with open arms, Morgan is lay on the sofa topless and when he notices me at the door he gets up and makes his way into his room. "how are things?" she playfully nudges me and I know she's on about Spencer. I sigh and her eyebrows raise.

She makes her way to the sofa Morgan was previously sat on and ushers for me to join her. "We had an argument." I blurt and briefly explain everything to Emily.
"It's been days and I haven't once seen or spoken him, he wasn't in on the last few days of work and I've been wandering around the apartment building like a little stalker hoping I might see him... but he's just gone?" Tears form in my eyes and Emily rubs my thigh.

"He's gone to LA." Morgan re enters the room fully clothed and takes a seat beside my bestfriend. "He's visiting his mum, don't worry he'll be back in a few days." my heart slows and I think about how stupid I'm being, it was all my fault anyway.

I faintly smile, attempting to cover my feelings, but the sympathy on Emily's face proves I'm not doing a very good job.

Spencer's POV:

"Spencer!" A brunette doctor holding a small tray approaches me. "it's nice to see you again. Your mother will be especially happy."
"Yeah." I nod and watch my mum writing in a small book by the window. "How is she?" I ask and the doctor raises her eyebrows before looking at the ground. "Not great, but better." she looks up and smiles hopefully. I continue with my expressionless face as she explains that my mother has been improving. "She's going to be really happy to see you, she talks about you all of the time." the doctor places her palm on my shoulder and squeezes a little before making her way to a patient.

I can't help the small smile when I think about her telling people about me. I'm not a very interesting person to talk about, which makes the daily letters hard to write, but I'm happy it makes her happy.

"Hi mum." I take a seat facing my mums and she continues to stare through the foggy window, occasionally writing things down. I frown slightly and call her name. "mum." her head snaps in my direction. "Spencer, what are you doing here?" she adjusts her seating position and frowns slightly.

"It's almost Christmas... I wanted to come and see you." My voice comes out slightly forced. I find it hard to visit my mum, it just reminds me of what I did.

"Oh, how have things been going?" she asks and I nod slowly. "alright I guess." my mum frowns further and I laugh inside, knowing that that's what my facial expression usually looks like. I look down and JJ comes into my head, I still haven't told my mum about her and I want to so badly.

"Don't lie to your mother Spencer." I look up and my mum is leaning forward slightly. "It's nothing." I try to cover up, she sighs and continues to write in her book. I open my mouth to speak, but change my mind. I should be able to talk to people about these things, especially my mother.

"It's this girl." My mum looks up again, this time with a smile and I tell her about JJ. "Is she pretty?"

"She's beautiful, I... I just, I'm not use to all this relationship stuff... she wants me to spend Christmas with her family but I-"

"You should go." My mum almost demands and I smile slightly. "Mr Reid?" I look up to find the brunette doctor from earlier. "Your mother has to have her medication now."
"Oh, I... I was just going." I begin to stand and my mum stands with me, the doctor leaves us alone for a few seconds while I say bye.

"She fancies you." I frown in confusion and my mum laughs while nodding to the brunette helping an old my from his chair. I snort and pull my mum into a hug. "I'll see you soon ok?" She sighs and let's go of me while meeting the doctor on the other side of the room.

I should visit my mother more often, I know I should. It's just hard. Right then had a conversation a mother and son should have, it was almost normal, but I know it can't always be like that. Schizophrenia doesn't just go away.