Epilogue

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Vic and I are still together to this cold October day in 2042. Both of us in our late 50s now but we still get some action! Vic finally drinks that coffee and reads his newspaper at our kitchen table, as I decide what we should dine to that night. He even stays fit, defying what all that grey hair on his perfect little head would make you think. He runs to worsen his bad joints, which I constantly worry about. Who knows? He could collapse one day and I would never even know. 'Oh stop worrying! I'm not going to hurt anything.' Vic says on a daily basis. I always watch him scurry down the street until I can't possibly see him. He reminds me of a little kid running for the ice cream truck. We never did adopt kids, although we did get a chocolate lab named Copeland, she had stunning big brown eyes. Vic always said she reminded him of me. Sadly, we had to put her down a year ago from her arthritis.

"Darling can you come over here and help me for a second?" Vic calls, speaking of drinking hot substances at tables, that's exactly what he happens to be doing right now. I forgot to mention, he's grown extremely fond of the name darling.

"One minute! Need more coffee?"

"Nope. Just need your brains for a moment." He replies, sounding calm so I don't run over there. I make my way to him after turning back our clocks, it's day-light-savings after all, and he looks up at me hungrily. I roll my eyes and open my mouth to answer but he grabs my neck pulling me down and taking a massive bite out of my head. -Just fucking with ya!

I go over-in real life-and he takes the pencil out of his mouth saying, "What's an 8 letter word for permanent brain damage?"

"Victor." I answer, smirking. He rolls his eyes and pushes at me, but smiling anyways.

"That's only six letters. Besides, you know it was anal damage, not brain." He says smirking back at me. Yes, our conversations are still like this even after all these years. You see, everyone always warned me that everything I love about Vic I would one day hate. But there's something flukey in that knowledge because, as cheesy as it sounds, I find myself falling in love with him all over again every single day.

"Oh shut up. You know I love you." I add, leaning down and pecking his still perfectly pink lips. He smiles and pulls me by my waist onto his lap. He kisses me again, but deeper, slowing time itself with his movements. I still feel a flutter in my stomach every single fucking time. I swear to god, like my potty mouth, it never fucking went away. Yes, even in our old-ish (I'm still 29) age we continue to make out on a daily basis. What can I say? My husband's hot. I smile into the kiss and place my hands around his neck.

"Aw." I hear Mike coo from behind Vic. I just ignore him and kiss Vic more forcefully. Oh yes, it still bothers him that we're together. Even more so now than ever. And of course, I continue to not care and get my hands all over Vic right in his face. I'm proud my husband is who he is, why hide it? I wanna make out, we make out. He wants to spoon, we spoon. That's how our relationship works, we both show our affection physically. Basically, in Mike's words, we 'can't keep our hands off each other'. Which I must admit, is true. We're basically constantly touching the other. That's how we like it, so that's how it is.
"You guys are so disgusting." Mike adds, still in that lovey dovey tone. I tangle my fingers in Vic's thinning hair, although my lungs aren't what they used to be and I have to pull back for air. I look at him deeply in his eyes and mentally tell him how I feel. We tend to this a lot, he then motions to Mike and I give him a pained look. He tightens his grip on me and leans our foreheads together. After a few seconds he let's me go and I stand up walking back to the stove.

"So Mikey boy, how's Alysha?" I ask, flipping the bacon. Yes, after numerous break ups they did end up getting married. I think Tay was even her maid of honour. Yes, she sent me a few dirty looks and tried to get Vic back despite her rich husband. Although me being the jealous protective bitch I am, I made her back off in the only way I knew how. I made out with him in the middle of the dance floor. He proposed to me the same year. It was quite funny, I had recently purchased a ring and was planning some cute of way of proposing to him, damn him and always being perfect. He surprised the shit out of me honestly, we were visiting his family and when driving home, stopped at the field we used to adore. I sat on the bench while he peed and got up walking around. It was quite late and out of nowhere fireworks started going off, I turned around trying to find Vic and see him kneeling in front of me with a black band inside a ring box on the palm of his hand. I actually laughed out loud at the time, simply out of irony. Vic and I actually had one single break up among the years. It was in college I was just commencing my first year and he said, my loser, moral, lame ass Vic, yet still mine, said (and I quote) okay okay I'm getting there, he said: "I need my slutty years".

I KNOW RIGHT!? I practically cracked in half, but I gave him the freedom anyway. It was so weird, I was so used to his presence in my life I didn't function without him. Luckily for me he came running back in a little less than three weeks. And I, being the fantastic person I am, welcomed him with open arms. Or open legs, I guess I should say. Yep, but hey I love him. Apparently after fucking two other guys he preferred making love to me. Holla! Like I said long ago: "Once you get a taste of Kellin, you never go back"

Anyways, sorry for the digression. Mike goes on and on about how she's perfect and yada yada yada I tuned him out 30 years ago. Vic comes up wrapping his arms around my waist and scaring me. I jump and he kisses my sweet spot, making me shiver.

"You almost made me burn the bacon!" I whisper to him, saying something to Mike to fein my attention. Vic starts kissing my neck and massaging my hip bones.

"Vic, not now. Mike's here." I whisper, placing the final piece of bacon on the paper towel and turning off the burner. He doesn't stop though and I can feel myself getting a little aroused.

"I love you." He whispers. Repeating it over and over again. Fuck, he knows what that does to me. I moan as he kisses my sweet spot again. Suddenly I feel like I'm floating. Oh shit, I am floating. Well, not really; Vic just decided to pick me up bridal style. I'm one of those weirdos who got scrawny as they age, so for someone muscular like Vic he enjoys lifting me up. Oh, and get this! I'm actually taller than Vic! I passed him when I was about twenty-two-years-old and got a few inches on him. Although, practically everyone is taller than poor Viccy. Yes, I do still call him that.

"Uh, guys?" Mike says from the doorway. I giggle as Vic spins me upwards lightly. I ignore Mike's fake gagging noises and whisper compliments in Vic's ear. He kisses my nose and carries me out to the hall.

"Ew please tell me not doing what I think you're doing." Mike says.

"That would be lying!" I call to him.

"Ewww you guys are so horny! Alysha never wants to do that anymore." He complains. I just laugh and kiss Vic and he kicks open the door, drops me on the bed an-
You guys are not old enough to hear this. I can't believe I even let you in on it before. I apologize dearly. Just wear protection! Abstinence is key! And all that other jazz. Well, that's all for me. I need Vic to penetrate me now, so I bid you ado! So long, and thanks for all the booze.

{A/N: casually quotes ATL
y'all have been a rad audience and I really thoroughly enjoyed sharing this experience with you. Please feel free to comment any constructive criticism or just plain comments about the book. I'm actually going to miss writing about quirkly lil Vic and seduceful Kellin. Oh my god I'm actually tearing up here. I DON'T WANT IT TO END :'( Let's cheers to this bitches. *insert beer emoji here*}

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