iz*One, ITZY, TWICE and NIZIU cracks and oneshots

About the Author-nim

"Okay first of all, before I start my humble introduction, I want to apologize for my grammar lapses and bad story narration. I—"
"Good morning Author-nim!"
"Oh hey." I said, pretending to be surprised.
"What brings you here losers?"
Yuri: Well, are you finished with the songs that you're writing for us?
"I'm sleepy *ze fake yawns* Come back tomorrow and make sure to bring—"
Hyewon: tada ! *ze shows a lot of food* actually author-nim, we really came here to visit you *smiles*
"What for?"
Hitomi *ze wears her glasses and grabs her notebook* We're going to conduct an interview.
"So now you're reporters?"
Eunbi: No but it seems that the readers wants to learn more about you.
"They don't even give a damn so yeah"
Sakura: But we do *ze winks*
"Ugh Sakura for goodness sake, don't you ever do that.. again" *inserts cringing face*
Hitomi: Okay then, let's get started! *ahem* I'll be the first one to ask, What's your real name?
"I'm sorry but I cannot answer that question. Next!"
Yuri: How old are you Author-nim?
"22 years old."
Yena: When is your birthday?
"December 28th"
Nako: Annouhh, What's your favorite food?
"Anything that tastes good in my mouth"
Hyewon: We do have that in common.
Minju: Who's prettier? Me or Sakura?
"I am ofcourse."
Hitomi: You're pretty but you're not a visual material
*double kill!*
Sakura *ze pinch Hii-chan* Don't you ever say that, author-nim is pretty!! Pretty!
"That's okay sakura, next."
Eunbi: Is it true that you hate Nako, Sakura and Hitomi before?
"Uhmmm.."
Sakura: Author never hated me! I was always her favorite!
Yuri: But I saw an old post from 2014 look..
ze post
Oh, so there's an anorexic girl and she's famous, then there's a shorty and someone with a puffy face showing an annoying cutesy. Really Akb? You're better than this.
All of them *gasps*
Sakura: Is that true author-nim? I thought i was always your favorite!
"Well past is past okay? What matters now is the present! I love the 12 of you equally!"
Sakura: But I am the favorite, right author-nim? You just swerved to Nako, Chaewon and Yena But I am the original favorite!
Nako: Yeah right.. yep.
Chaewon:. yeah
Yena: Oh sure.
"Next question!"
Wonyoung: We heard that you never care nor thought about us but you know of Sakura, Hii-chan, Nako, Chayeon and Eunbi-nim, is that true?
"Like what I have said, I am a fan of Akb so its natural for me to be familiar of Nako, Sakura and Hitomi. Well I have a friend who's into Kpop way back in college and I kind of saw Eunbi on her bias list— with a blonde hair can barely recall."
Chayeon: What about me?
*fidgeted her fingers*
" W-well..chae..."
Hyewon: Am i seeing things?
Minju: Or Author-nim's acting coy, for real?
Hitomi: She's a tsunde—
*slaps Hitomi again*
"Uhmm... *gulps* i-i uhh have a crush on you earlier last year before being wizone was a thought. I saw your videos on Facebook and watched it. I swear, the moment that I saw you is the moment where I first appreciated women who can be hotter than men too."
All: Awe
Chayeon *blushed* I-I didn't know you have that kind of affection towards me.. *fidgeted her fingers* , I thought you were just an old perverted and coquettish wom—
Hitomi: Unniee!
Chayeon: Yeah right.. *ze hugs me* Thank you Author-nimmuuu!
*blushed*
Sakura: Oy, you're not going to end ChaeKkura right?
"N-next p-please.."
Yujin: How did you become a wizone? I heard that you know of us earlier last year but you didn't stan us because of your loyalty to 2ne1.
"Yeah. I know of you guys earlier last year because my niece was an avid fan of yours since PD48 days but well, not into new girlgroups so I just ignored and soon forget about you."
Wonyoung: But you know of Chayeon-unnie
"But I don't care about you all that time. I didn't even know that Queen chae is from iz*One. My niece relentlessly keeps on introducing iz*one to me but I'd rather fix my nails. I just became a wizone about a month ago during fiesta era after being captivated by Nako's charm."
Eunbi: that's why Nako is the favorite. She's the one who make the author-nim a wizone without doing a thing.
Yujin: But didn't you hate her?
"Uhmm... well.. *fidgeted her fingers* I never recognized her.. tho she looks familiar, same as Sakura who aged like a fine wine—"
Sakura: That's the spirit Author-nim!
Eunbi: Sakura, Let the respected author-nim finished her sentence first.
"So yeah, I got hooked up not because of the visuals but because of them — being a different person in one group but can still get along. Tho it was true one of the reason why I really got baited because of Nako, Chaewon and Yena.. at first, I was just planning to be a solo Nako Bias and wouldn't care about the rest but here I am, I ended up being an OT12 Stan. I equally love you all guys.
All of them: Awe..
"NEXT"
Wonyoung: Have you ever got yourself confused because of JoYuriz?
"No? Not at all.."
Hitomi: EH? HONTOU?
"Please Hitomi, kindly press the subtitle. I can't understand you."
Yuri: REALLY?
"Bitch please, its easy distinguish your facial differences. Chaewon's eyes is far different from Yena and Yuri's. Yuri looks like baekhyun and Yena looks like the pre-debut of Dara."
Yena *blushed* D-Dara? Of 2ne1? That was quite a compliment... *gulps*
Hitomi: But the song "Oh My!" drives her nuts because she cannot distuingish our voice---
*slaps hitomi again*
Chaewon: Atleast she knows Kkura-chan's voice! *then laughs*
*glared at ssamu/ze hits her*
Chaewon *rubbing her head* That hurts author-nimmu.
Sakura: HAH! I ALWAYS KNEW THAT I AM THE AUTHOR NIM'S FAVE! BETCH!
*geez*
Yujin *ahem* Next question author-nim, Is it true that JinJoo was your first ship.
*inserts me trying to stop myself*
"N-no.. I first ship NakoJin.. duh?"
Nako*smirks* Oh Really?
Sakura: Really?
Chaeyeon: Really?
Chaewon: Really?
Hitomi: REALLY?
Yujin: Sure
"U-UH.. yeaaah?"
Yena: Yeah right.
"ALRIGHT! I SHIP JINJOO TO BITS! OKAY? AND I STILL SUPPORT THEM UP TO NOW, HAPPY?"
Hitomi: Chill out, answering a question won't hurt you.
Minju: But didn't you say that you absolutely detest incestry? You're a principled woman, How can you ship me to my younger sister?
How can you ship me to my younger sister?
How can you ship me to my younger sister?
How can you ship me to my younger sister?
Yujin: She's right, she was just a big sister to me!
she was just a big sister to me!
she was just a big sister to me!
she was just a big sister to me!
oT12: Earth to Author-nim, hello?
"I'm okay, Next!"
Nako: Author-nimmu, What is banging?
"It's a western slang, is that your question?"
Nako: Nope, Author-nimmu, What are the tracks from our album that keeps you banging?
"That's a quite a question there shorty but I can say that it's Airplane and Ayayaya that keeps my head go bang bang! It was quite a banger tho. But my favorite track will always be Colors. Next!"
Sakura: Choose One iz*One member that you want to date and one member that you want to marry.
"Chayeon. Only Chaeyeon."
Chaeyeon *blushed*
Sakura: Author-nim I love you but I cannot let you wreck ChaeKkura!
"But you guys were just best friends.."
Sakura: And you're straight as hell author-nim.
Right chae?
Chaeyeon *just staring at author-nim*
"N-next!"
Hyewon: Next question Author-nim, Since you are a former english teacher at some international online school, would you mind tutoring Wonyoung to develop her grammar skills and to emphasize her confidence?
OT11: YOURE A FORMER TEACHER!?
Hitomi: And now she was just an ordinary unmarried old la—
*spanks Hitomi on her face*
Chaewon *whispered* That was the third time already.
"Well Wonyoung is already confident about her English despite of having a lot of lapses. I am not quite good at english either But I wouldn't mind to lend a scarce amount of knowledge to her, and to you guys as well, if you don't mind"
OT11: Awe!!
Wonyoung *smiled* Thank you author-nim!
Yuri: My turn! What's is your favorite album right now? Or track?
"Uhmm Color*IZ but if you're talking about track well so far, my favorite is Ayayayaya because it was quite catchy and—"
Chaewon: Nako has its lines, yeah.
*inserts crickets*
Eunbi: Okay, is it true that you are a musician in your past life?
"No.. I wasn't really musically inclined before. Tho i do listen to music but I wasn't a huge fan of it not until 4th grade. It has become my blood that keeps on flowing all over veins. And i used to be a back up singer in our Church's choir."
Sakura: Back up? But you have a good voice Author-nim!
"Well, it wasn't that good to be in front line. Next!"
Yuri: When did you start composing songs?
"When I got myself hooked up to music. At first I thought it was just a simple poetry. Then i decided to put a tune on it while playing my Toy piano and guitar. I never wanted to become a musician to be honest but I kind of think like i was having fun of feeling that I am one hell of a musician."
Yena: Author-nim, since you are a former choir singer —well you are a back up but atleast a singer then Uhmm.. What is your vocal range and  Vocal type?
"Well my vocal type is contralto and my vocal range is 3."
Yuri: Contralto means the lowest vocal range for female right? So how come it was 3?
"Well my vocal type was a contralto because i do sing better in low tune, it was developed when i was at the our church's choir but I can also sing in semi-high pitch but it wasn't as high as Yuri.
Yuri: We can give it a try..
"N-no.. and I only know English songs*
Yuri: That's Okay Author-nim!
"Seriously, I haven't been active on singing since 7th grade and a i lack of vocal control so no please."
Yena: Terrible liar.
"Next question!"
Sakura: Hey Author-nim *ze wipes her nose* Is it true that you were once part of a singing-dancing group in your barangay?
"Uhmm yes?"
Chaewon: So you can dance too? Girl you should join Pd48! They can help you to hone your skills!
"I really don't like to be honest. And I really can't dance.."
Sakura: But it says here that you were once a center in every dance competition. You wore the best outfit and you're probably the prettiest!
"That's too much of a compliment Sakura But Yeah.. despite of my lack of dancing abilities, people find me appealing back then so they put me in the center.."
Chayeon: Just like Sakura.
Sakura: Hey! Author-nim, chaeyeon is shading me!
Eunbi: How old are you that time? And how it was discovered?
"I am 10 years old. It was just a local dance group back then during our barangay festival. Well we are like the "center/front" liners because we're appealing and "good looking", i was the youngest and we all know that the youngest gets the most appeal and appreciation.
Yena: But Minzy doesn't—
"Next!"
Hitomi: How old were your colleagues there? In that group?
"The oldest is Ate Yves who is already 19 that time, (December 31, 1988), then Ate Majo who is 15, she was born (December 17, 1992) Marge (January 5, 1994) and Skyla (August 31, 1994 )who is 13 and me (December 28, 1997) who is 10."
Hitomi: Are you guys still active?
"Hmm. The last time we made a dance and song cover was 6 years ago "Bye Bye Bye" by Nsync before Marge's graduation. I was the only member who remained active because i was only at my first year of college that time. And i never became interested anymore so i switched into pageantries. NEXT"
Chaewon: What sports do you usually play?
"Not into sports but i do play badminton, volleyball and doing a little of weightlifting."
Sakura: No wonder why you have abs and muscles. thats my author-nim for you!
Nako: Fandoms that you're in at the moment?
"Midzy and Wizone"
Eunbi: As a leader of Iz*ONE, i dare you to do an impromptu performance.
"*sighs* I really have no choice then"
Eunbi: Minna-san, give it up for the Author-nim!

Cast a spell
Name a curse
Throw a wish on the well
If you want me then make a move first
You know my name
And you want to play this game
But you played dirty and it drives me insane
Now I am loving the way I was tamed
And how you deliver me to vein

Ohh
Your smile drives my hysterical
Ohh
But your voice sounds magical
Ohh
Everything about you is enchanted
Ohh
And all of my thoughts about you keeps me haunted

How can I escape this
If you already sealed me by your kiss
How can I ever get myself away with it
If I was restrained by the the warmth of your embrace
You make me want you in different ways
When you put your hands on my waist
How can I ever keep up with the phase
If I am already losing grace

There's something odd about you
That puts me in a real mood
I hate the way move
But I love how it makes me feel so good

*sighs*
Hitomi: Another subtle s*x song by Author-nim.
Wonyoung: Unnie, you can remove your hands off my ears now.
Eunbi: What's the title of that song?
"Guilty Pleasure. It just popped out to my head. By the way, better be ready for the next chapter losers!!"