I have some explaining to do

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Hi guys

I'm sorry if you thought this was an update

I know I'm a terrible writer

I promised you a chapter weeks and weeks ago but I never gave you one

I have some reasons

I'm graduating soon and I know I always use this excuse but I have no motivation or time to do anything.

I'm also super depressed and I'm struggling to keep everything on track

I'm constantly working.

Don't think that I haven't tried writing, trust me I'll open up the chapter and get about 50 words in and just start to cry because I feel like I just can't do it

I feel like such a shitty writer and person And I'm struggling big time

Another thing, I'm broken hearted

Had the biggest crush on a stupid boy for the past year, he did some terrible things to me and now I'm left to cry. Literally I haven't stopped being so depressed over him

I'm trying to hard to move on but I feel like I can't

On top of that I feel like I don't deserve the comments, the votes, the support and love since I feel like I can't give anything back.

Also 100k

I'm so sorry I didn't thank any of you guys, in all honesty I haven't been on here in a few days and when I saw it I started crying.

I don't deserve it

Thank you so fucking much you guys

I'm trying to get a new chapter out I really am but I just feel like I can't

So right now I'm trying to fix myself

I've ordered a few new books in to start reading in hopes I get that creative flare that work, school and my love life has stripped from me

I've ordered in Unwind by Neal Shusterman that I'm keen for

But the book I'm really fucking excited for should be here soon

It's called The Long Walk by Stephen King

I haven't felt excited in a while and right now I'm buzzing to get my hands on it

Thank you all for the consistent love although I don't deserve it

I really love you all and I'm trying to get this new chapter out

If you are tired of waiting you can maybe check out my other books and have a read of them while you wait

I know that's a stupid excuse and I'm not self promoting I'm just trying to find different ways to help myself feel better and make me feel like I'm not letting you all down

I love you guys a lot

Thank you

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