The Act (Malec AU)

Chapter 3

While stretching his aching limps, Alec felt a thundering pain in his head. What the hell happened last night? Trying to sit up straight he noticed the half-naked body next to him.

Magnus Bane.

Alec couldn't help but stare at that perfectly fit body. The well-toned abs that begged to be licked. Alecs tongue darted out, wetting his bottomlip. Wondering what Magnus would taste like.

What the hell am I doing!

He jumped out of the bed, waking Magnus.

"That is a terrible way to wake people up..."

Magnus groaned before seeing the fear plastered all over Alecs face.

"Ohh..."

Magnus got out of bed and grabbed his clothes.

"Don't worry Alexander, nothing happened."

"Then why the hell are you in my bed!"

Alecs voice were almost a whining scream. He felt like crying. How did this happen? He had tried so hard to erase that side of him...

"Alexa..." Magnus had reached out to calm Alec down, but he yanked his arm away.

"Get out. I don't want you here! GET OUT!"

Magnus could hear the hurt and fear and shame in Alecs voice, so he did as he asked. Not wanting to cause him anymore pain.

As soon as Magnus closed the door Alec dropped to his knees, covering his face with his hands. Sobbing.

-----

When Magnus came to set, he stayed clear of Alec as much as possible. He blamed himself. He shouldn't have stayed. He knew Alec would regret it. He should have left as soon as Alec fell asleep. He didn't blame Alec for hating him right now. Alec had been drunk and unaware of what he was doing. Magnus had been the sober one. The responsible one.

"Alec. Magnus. We're going to shoot the first scene. So remember, Alec your character are annoyed by the fact that his new partner is a troublemaker. So, let that be shown."

"That shouldn't be a problem."

Alec muttered under his breath, though loud enough that Magnus heard.

Magnus then realized that Alec had put his armor back up.

What a shame.

Magnus thought about how comfortable Alec had seemed yesterday when he had let his guard down. He had seemed almost happy. Not this brooding guy.

Alec followed the director still creating as much distance as possible to Magnus. He hoped he could make Magnus hate him, because then he would stay away. That would make everything easier. Alec didn't trust himself around Magnus anymore. He didn't trust himself to stay away. So he did what he could to provoke Magnus.

Alec took a couple of deep breaths and accessed his character in his mind. His physicality changed along with facial expression. Disgust shined through. He stood taller and more military. A stone-cold facial expression that only shoved the dislike he felt for Magnus' character.

For a second Magnus felt hurt. He felt like this was how Alec looked at him now. But he only let himself feel it for a second before becoming his own character as well. He had never let anyone hurt him for more than a second.

The scene went splendidly. The loathing and repulsing embodied the entire scene, making their director yell with delight.

"Amazing! You guys did a great job. It was perfection! Take a couple of minutes before we shoot the next scene. Incredible job guys."

Alec rushed out, leaving Magnus alone with the cast.

Outside he leaned against the wall drawing in shallow breaths. Trying to get a hold of himself. He had channeled every emotion he had into that scene. But the emotions weren't for Magnus, it was for himself. He used the way he loathed himself for not being able to change. The disgust he had for his own feelings and desires. And it had left him empty.

He slid down with his back against the wall until he could rest his head on his knees. He knew he had to channel those emotions once more and he was so afraid to loose himself to them.

Taking in a deep breath, he rose to his feet and entered the building again.

Magnus was talking to the director when Alec came in. He walked right past them and took his position for the next scene. Stone-cold once more.

Magnus sighed. This was going to be a long day if he didn't do anything.

"I'm sorry can I have a quick chat with my co-star before we start again?"

The director waved his hand at him to go ahead while talking to cameraman about the angles.

Magnus grabbed Alecs arm and dragged him with him.

"Hey! Let go. What the hell are you doing?!"

"Listen! You are ruining your big chance! You have landed a great role and you are throwing it away by acting like a child over something that never happened!"

Magnus had pushed Alec against the wall. No way in hell her would let Alec ruin things for himself.

"If you keep trying to ignore me or hate me, it is eventually going to show on camera, and sure right now that works for these scenes. But we are supposed to become partners. Friends! Brothers!"

Magnus let go of Alec and stepped away. Taking a deep breath to calm himself.

"Nothing happened last night. I promise. I wouldn't do that. You fell asleep and you had asked me to stay, so I stayed. And maybe I shouldn't have. I see that now. But we all make mistakes."

Alec could feel the tears burning in his eyes. He didn't want to let Magnus see him like this. So, he did the only thing that he could think off. He lashed out at the one thing he knew could hurt Magnus.

"Don't pretend I'm like you! You don't know anything about me. I'm not some guy that are disgusting enough to sleep with other men! I am not acting like this because of something that did or did not happen last night. I'm acting like this because I can't stand to look at you!"

Alec pushed past him and ran towards his trailer, leaving a stunned Magnus behind.

Alec slammed the door behind him, letting the tears stream down his face. He had used his father's words as a weapon. He knew how cruel they were. He couldn't believe he had just done that.

He didn't recognize himself anymore.

Still standing with his back against the door, he could feel someone knocking outside. It was probably the director, since he fled from the scene. He had to come up with an excuse.

He opened the door and almost slammed it back in, when Magnus pushed through.

"You can't use words to hurt me. You can't say anything I haven't heard a thousand times before."

Magnus cupped Alecs Jaw with one hand looking into his eyes. He knew Alec probably would push him away. But he didn't. Magnus could see the tears that had built up.

"Alexander, you can stop trying to make me hate you. It will never happen. I can't hate you for being scared."

Hearing these words made Alecs tears stream down his face. No one had ever told him, that they couldn't hate him. No one had ever called him out on being scared. He couldn't say anything, he just started sobbing.

"I promise you alexander, there is nothing to be ashamed off."

Magnus held Alec in his arms, providing him with the care he needed to let everything out.