Chapter 34

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Chapter 34

Charlie

It's been a very lonely, strange and stressful month after Natalie got stabbed and Steven was put away. We were told he was in for good this time and there was no chance of release. After that night we should have been able to breathe, relax and in a way we did. We also cried harder than I thought possible. They say grieving is a way to move on. I don't know if I can.

We were all busy some in a good ways, some bad. Natalie occupied my mind most of the time. The men were overseeing the development of the ranch while I maintained a vigil more often than not at the hospital. Natalie was in a coma. One they didn't believe she wouldn't come out of. We held on to hope but everyday she didn't wake up was another day our hope diminished.

We missed Thanksgiving. We all spent the holiday at the hospital with Natalie. I was there most days until dinner time. Then Pops and Ryan would come to get me and see her. None of us were really in the mood for the holidays. Our hearts just weren't in it. Pops was taking it the hardest, rightfully so. No parent should outlive their child.

Natalie lost so much blood it was hard to believe she had been able to hold on as long as she did. She made it through surgery but she was so weak and I believe heartbroken she just didn't want to come back to us. I think Baxter's decision to stay away didn't help. I heard talking to coma patients help but I'm not sure now.

She didn't know he wasn't there at in hospital at least. I tried to assure her that Baxter was asking about her and concerned just like the rest of us but I think him not being here for her was only making it worse. No matter how many times I tried to convince him that Natalie needs him, Baxter had his excuses to stay away. I know there's more to this than I've been told by Ryan or Baxter.

They've avoided the conversation with me and only ask me if Natalie has improved. It's the same answer each time. No improvement. The doctors told me we might want to consider our options. It's been a month and nothing. They're only going to let us keep her there for so long then we either move her or take her off life support. I don't want to make that decision.

As time has passed the men come less and less although I'm with Natalie everyday. I make baked goodies for the nurses and have gotten some business from them as well. That's not why I'm here but it occupies my mind. I need to start thinking of our future. I have a baby coming soon. I can't keep putting everything on hold.

"Charlie!" I hear my name coming from down the hall just as I was leaving. "I'm glad I caught you!"

"Hello Meredith! Is everything alright?" The doctor rarely talks to me. It's usually Pops or Ryan when they come by.

"Yes I just wanted to let you know that Pops called earlier. He's asked that we take Natalie off life support tomorrow after they come say their goodbyes. Honey I'm so sorry. You have been here every day for her. You need to focus on that baby. Natalie would want that." Meredith took my hand as I frown feeling very left out of this choice. "They didn't want to upset you."

I can only nod feeling so lost and alone hearing this news. "Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry I need to get going." I don't want to talk to her. I want to talk to Ryan. He made this choice without me. Why would he do this?

As usual Ryan was downstairs in the garage waiting for me this time Pops was with him. They knew I would be told today. I couldn't keep the tears from streaming down my face now. Natalie was the only friend I ever had and because of my world she's gone, or will be tomorrow.

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