More Than What Meets the Eye-Oscar Diaz-On My Block

17

With everything that has happened, sleep has become a fleeting chore. I wrestle at nights with the dark and the light trying to find comfort from either side but most times I lose the fight. I have become content with my sleepless nights where I find comfort in my thoughts and memories of the past.

The dark consumes but sleep still eludes, it appears it has divorced itself from me. I'm sleepless at a time when rest is all I need to refuel me to make it through one more day without you.

I just wanted you right by my side once again and you being in the state was driving me mad!

"Abuelita..."I muttered while looking at her resting with an IV attached to her arm. I soon then turned my attention to looking around the room.

The hospital room was as devoid of beauty as I am of hope. Its walls are simply cream, not peeling or dirty, just cream. There is no decoration at all save the limp curtain that can separate her bed from the three others in here. It was perhaps once the kind of green that reminded people of spring-time and hope, but it's faded so much that the hue is insipid. The room as an undertone of bleach and the floor was simply grey. At the far end were windows in brown metal frames, only openable at the top. Not a single person had flowers, cards or home brought food to the other people here but I knew my grandmother was loved.

Ruby and his family would bring flowers and meals to me too make sure I was doing good, Monse and Jamal would stop by to tell me about their high school drama to bring a smile on my face, Cesar would spend time with me to vent about his brother and his female problems which were very clear and simple to fix but high school drama.

Then there was Oscar-

I turned and looked down at him sleeping on my shoulder. He was sleeping like an insomniac finally cured of his debilitating disorder, and I treasured every second of watching him. It was probably the most peaceful and calm I have ever seen this guy.

"soft like jello pudding..." I thought to myself, "And yet it was the most amazing thing, to be able to sit in your lap and be only centimeters away from you and to feel the warmth of your breath on my skin."

His arms were sprawled across my waist while his other hand held mine, and our fingers meshed on top of one another. Our legs were intertwined into one tangled mess, but everything still fits perfectly like the individual, uneven pieces of a complicated puzzle. All our pieces, some pitted or containing protrusions, gracefully complemented one another to create an image that I could forever marvel on.

We were now building something beautiful, you and I. Everything fit like we were made to be together.

These were a peaceful time. It is during these times that I am able to reflect and I think this is me realizing that my broken pieces aren't so broken anymore. I think this is me finally realizing our inexplicableness had its time, and that time is over.

You told me you will handle the Prophet$ and you would take care of my grandmother's medical bills, I couldn't just sit here and let my love for you sway me off the path. This incident didn't just bring us together, it also reminded me of why I needed to leave this place. Period.

I removed his arms from around my waist and rose up only to feel a tight grip on my arm.

"W-Where are you going?" Oscar groaned.

"To get something to drink," I replied, "I'll be right back."

I stepped out of the room and towards the vending machine. Standing in front of this machine and I can only think about priorities. Should I get "Doritios" or "Lays?" Should you get that much-needed extra hour of sleep, or finish running errands or do laundry? Is it more important to spend that evening with Oscar...or get the cash I needed to get away from him?

If choosing priorities was solely about choosing my favorite things, then admittedly the bulk of my days would be getting to know Oscar and not seeing the side that I mostly saw which was Spooky.

But this was all oversimplified, but the thing is, there's really no wrong – or right – answer. But this needed to be done and I needed to make sure it was done.

I pulled out my phone to read over the text I had received from the showrunner.

"Do you accept the job?"

"Yes."

"Make sure to be ready to leave LA when your grandmother is out of the hospital. Then meet us 20.2114, 87.4654."

I know by accepting this job was endangering my life but the value of the job outweighed the danger. Besides, I knew it wouldn't be a one-man job but a multi-team job with a few friends that I had kicked it with when I was 16 living in DTLA. This had to be done.

For destroying me, I was given the chance to become that much more whole.

"Lena," I heard as I turned around to see Oscar walking towards me. I couldn't help but noticed the many other eyes on him, considering he was wearing the staple loose-fitting khaki shorts with knee-high socks and a button-front shirt.

"I need to handle some business, but once I finish, I will come back here," Oscar said placing a kiss on your head, "The bill has already been taken care of."

My eyes widen out of shock. How the hell was he able to come up with that money that quick?

"W-What...h-"

"Don't worry," Oscar said with a low chuckle, "I told you I will handle it and take care of you."

Oscar pulled me to his warmth and spoke softly in my ear, "You have me," I smiled with twinkling tears falling from my eyes. This cholo ceases to amaze me.
He kissed my forehead once again and walked out of the hospital while pulling his phone out and speaking to who knows who in that gang of his.

I walked back into the room to see my grandmother looking at me. Her eyes wide open as she looked down at me and smiled.

"Mi hija...I had to almost die for you to get a novio?" she asked.

My eyes widen at her statement and then went to the back of my mind thinking about if she and Oscar had an actual conversation. But I prefer to not let her interact with Oscar, considering that we would be leaving Freeridge after I finish this job.