Learning how to forgive and move on

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Amelia

After we returned from spring break, Colton sat down with Dad and talked to him. He told him everything that happened.

He looked at Colton and Mom, who looked back at him.

"What do you think?" He asked Dad.

"Well, I could say you don't forgive him, but it seems like they put him into a situation he didn't think he would be in at all. I know you're angry, Colton, but as a father, I can tell you that trying to do the right thing isn't always easy," Dad explained.

Colton sat there, thinking. It was always hard to gauge what was going through his head.

"Look, when we have a child, they hand us this little person to take care of and raise them. They don't hand us a manual about what to do. We go base on instinct. People have written books on the subject, but they forget that every child is different. No matter what anyone says, not every child will do things because we expect it," he reasoned.

"Honestly, though, I think you should forgive him; If not for him, at least for yourself," Dad told him.

"Maybe, but for ten years, I dealt with a rough home life. It wasn't until I came here that I had family dinners, didn't have to worry about cleaning up a mess, had peace," Colton said.

"You had stability. I'm surprised you managed all these years living in the situation you did. That speaks volumes," Dad told him.

"Yeah," Colton said.

Whatever happens now was entirely up to Colton.

Colton

I listened to what Luke said. He was a reasonable guy. I took that next step and met with my dad.

We met at a coffee shop to talk. I promised nothing, but it was a start.

We sat at a table and ordered coffee. It was quiet at first, then I spoke. "So, you left the witch?"

"Yes," my dad said.

"Interesting," I said as I took a sip of my coffee. "Would you have left your wife even if the kids were yours," I asked. It was an honest question.

"Yes," he answered.

"You sure about that? Because you chose her over me or did you forget that," I asked as he looked at me.

"No, I didn't forget, and I wish I would have never done it. I let fear take over me," Dad said to me. "Colt, I screwed up. I wish I wouldn't have. Every day I regret leaving you. Every day I wish I would have followed my instinct. Every day I live with my choices. Every single damn day."

I could hear the regret in his voice. It was clear.

I didn't want to be angry anymore and tired of it. Luke was right. It was time to forgive. As much as people would say, don't. It wasn't for him. It was for me.

"I forgive you," I said sincerely.

He looked at me, surprised.

"I forgive you because I need to move on. The anger is holding me back, and I can't do that anymore. I can't say we'll have a relationship because you lost that chance when you didn't come back, but all I can do is forgive you," I told him.

I stood up as he did too. "Colt," Dad said.

"Goodbye, Dad," I told him. With that, I turned and walked away.

I forgave my father, but I didn't see a relationship with him. He chose someone else over me, who lied over his flesh and blood.

As I walked out of the coffee shop, I got met by a slap. They tried to slap me again, and I grabbed their wrist. I pushed them away.

"You! You did this, you little shit! You ruin everything," she spat.

"Wait, so you fucking around and getting knocked up was me ruining things? I do not see the logic in that," I said to my step monster.

"All he ever did was whine about you," she screamed at me.

"Really? Because he chose you over me," I yelled back.

"You'll pay for this," she spat as she pulled a gun. What the hell? This woman was fucking nuts. People came out of the coffeehouse, and someone called 911 as she fired.

Only the bullet didn't hit me. I looked at Dad as his eyes widened, and blood filled his mouth. I held onto him as he said, "At least this time, I could save you."

He closed his eyes as I held him while blood covered me. "Dad?"

I laid him down and started doing CPR. Paramedics arrived, and so did the police. They chased Marsha down before tackling her to the ground. They worked on my dad, but it was too late. The bullet had ripped through an artery, causing him to bleed out.

As much as I didn't want a relationship with him, the little boy in me cried. I may have forgiven him, but that little boy mourned him at that moment.

I watched as they placed my dad's body in a bag and zipped it. They put it on a stretcher and placed it into the ambulance. The cops led me to a car and took me down the station. They needed my statement.

After giving one, they asked who they should call. I told the police, Luke Langston. I waited as Luke arrived. He saw me sitting there, covered in blood. He walked over to me. I looked at him as tears fell down my cheeks.

He gave me a comforting look as he pulled me into a hug.

"It's okay, Colton," Luke assured me.

"He said he could finally save me. Why?" I choked.

He looked at me, "Because it was his final act of ultimate forgiveness. It was his chance to be the father he always wanted to be."

I nodded as I cried. Luke just let me cry as he held me.

There are two men, one blood, one not. Both fathers. Both had different views as fathers, one that gave his life for me, one that comforted me. At that moment, I knew if I ever had kids, what kind of father I wanted to be.

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