American Woman: Book 4

Chapter 68

The following evening, I decided to call Mayte and feel her out about what had transpired the previous day at lunch. She graciously accepted my apology and extended an apology herself. She said she wasn't even really mad at me, she was just upset because I was verbalizing some of her inner thoughts and worries. She told me she felt Lenny was the one and wanted very much to settle down and raise a family with him. However, even though Lenny has expressed he loves her and desires the same things, he had never truly said he desired it with her. Just that he wants to get married and have more children. She doesn't know if she's to assume that since he continues to be with her that he thinks she is, or at least may be, the one he wants to do those things with, but she isn't positive.
"So why don't you just ask him? I mean if for some bizarre reason he doesn't want those things with you, or if he has doubts, wouldn't you rather know now than waste anymore time?" I questioned her while putting the finishing touches on Waverly's birthday cake.
"I wish I had the self confidence, or guts, or whatever to do that, but I'm just too scared of the possibility, however slim, that he would say he doesn't see that with us." She replies through the speaker phone.
"Mayte, I mean I guess I can't guarantee it since I don't know what he thinks or feels, but I highly doubt he would continue a relationship with you if he doesn't see that being at least an option. If it's a no way, he wouldn't still...."
"But that's just it! I don't even want to hear a "maybe." Even that would crush me...."
"I never knew you were so insecure. I mean, you used to get up on stage and dance around in front of thousands of people, men screaming for you. So you have no problem getting their attention. And you have one of the kindest hearts. I don't understand why you don't value what a catch you are..."
"I don't know. I mean I don't want to put the blame on anyone but I do think getting involved with Prince so young and him being my first everything might have screwed me up in the relationship department a little bit."
Prince had been standing in front of the fridge eyeing all the goodies for tomorrow's party and slammed the door shut when he heard that and spun around towards me. I held up my palm to him and shooed him away before he could react and let her know he had been listening. He glared at me and stomped off into the living room with a loud huff and I could hear him mumbling a rant.
"I mean he kinda set the standard in so many ways. I always felt inferior to him professionally so that was a huge part of it. Never feeling his equal I suppose. But that was more in my own mind, nothing he really ever said or did. But then the personal side of our relationship grew and I thought we were together for like months, and in reality I was one of at least three at the time. And even after I found out, I continued to be with him. Of course he promised me I would be the only one and I truly think I was, but that right there shows I didn't give myself enough value or worth. But then once we were together for so long, I got spoiled to the way he treats his women and his lifestyle. I've never had a man shower me with so much attention at every waking moment. He had so much awareness about every little detail and made you feel so special. I mean you know how he is. What other man notices a new pair of earrings or your makeup or whatever. Anyway I guess I thought all guys would be like that so after we divorced and I started to date people, I felt like I wasn't special anymore because they weren't anything like him and his ways. Then entered Tommy. He tried hard to woe me and it reminded me a little of Prince in that way so I think that's why I gave him a shot. And he didn't take long to propose so I thought he felt I was truly something special. But then a couple months into wedding planning, he says how he didn't think he wanted anymore children. That was a deal breaker for me. And he knew it, so I think he may have wanted me to end it or something, I don't know, there were rumors of infidelity but I never knew for sure. I've casually dated a couple other men since then but it's never gotten very serious. Just finding someone is so hard. I don't want to have to search anymore, especially when I feel like I found the one."
"Honestly, I think if you were to tell him that, he would open up completely to you. He may be just as scared as you are about how you truly feel. If you've never told him you think he's the one, he could be feeling the exact things you are and doesn't want to hear you think he's just a maybe. Man I wish you could have met Roxie. All the good in Lenny comes straight from her. And I know he has so much of her inside him that he wouldn't be stringing you along or anything. And if she were here and thought he was, look out! She would put him in his place fast!" I giggled. "God I miss that woman. Not a lot of women could say they adore their mother in law. Nothing against Prince's mom, but Roxie was truly special...."
"I wish I could have met her too. Lenny has told me a lot about her. I even make her famous apple pie for him."
"Oh yeah?" I said, swallowing a lump in my throat as Prince walked back into the kitchen, rolling his eyes and making the talking motion with his hand. I knew it was wrong but I felt a little upset, or betrayed somehow, when Mayte mentioned the pie. That pie was something special between Roxie, my mom, and me and it almost felt like an intrusion on our bond that Mayte was now fixing it.
"Yeah. It took a few tries to get it just right, but I think I got it. Lenny scarves it down anyway...."
My other line beeped in, saving me from having to hear anymore. "Mayte I'm so sorry. Someone is trying to call in. I'll see you tomorrow for the party."
"Sure hun. Bye."
"Hello?"
"Jen? Hey I know it's getting late but I think dad is in his final hours. He's demanding to see you. I've been putting him off, but he's insistent. Is there anyway you can come? Even just for a few minutes?" Lenny pleaded.
I cut my eyes towards Prince who gives me a reassuring nod. "Yeah I just got everything finished up for the party. I'll be there as soon as I can. Do you need anything? I was just on the phone with Mayte. I'm sorry if you were trying to get through to her, I'm sure you can now."
"No, I'm good thanks, and I don't want to bother her this late. She wasn't feeling well earlier anyway. I think she needs the rest." Lenny replies sweetly.
I end the call with Lenny and start to gather my belongings to leave. "She probably isn't feeling well because she ate her own cooking. That's total bull shit about Lenny scarfing that pie down...."
"Oh Prince! You're just mad because..."
"Of course he could be doing the ''maybe if I shovel it in fast enough, I won't actually taste it' move I used to do when she cooked for me..."
"Stop!" I chuckle. "You're just pissed because of what she said about you. Anyway, Lenny used to throw my cooking in the trash while I wasn't looking so I know what it feels like to have your man not like your cooking. But us women only get better with time and practice, and I'm sure she has, just like I have."
"I can't imagine you were ever a bad cook, momma." Prince laughs.
"Well I wasn't very good, especially when Lenny and I first got married..."
"That's because you were cooking stuff with meat..."
"I still cook stuff with meat."
"Well not for your man. And I would never throw your cooking away...."
"You've spit it out before though."
"Never." He defends himself.
"How about those cookies on the plane just a few weeks ago?"
"Oh...yeah...well that wasn't..."
"Wasn't what? Me in my 'normal' state of mind?" I glare at him.
"Shouldn't you get going?" He asks, trying to weasel his way out of the conversation. "Don't stay too long though..."
"Why?! Because I can't be trusted alone for long periods of time?!"
"Damn, Jensen! Quit taking everything the wrong way! No that's not why I said that. I said it because it's already late and Waverly's birthday is tomorrow. That's all I meant." He huffs.
"Ok, fine, I'm sorry. I'm just on edge I guess.... several things are bothering me at the moment." I admit, grabbing my keys.
"Well if you get back soon, we can discuss them." Prince smirks. "I know something that can make it all better."
"Believe it or not, your dick doesn't magically fix things." I roll my eyes, heading for the exit.
"I beg to differ." He laughs, giving me a wink and a wave.
My stomach tossed and turned the whole drive to see Sy. I didn't want to watch him die. I hope he doesn't pass while I'm there or have Lenny ask me to stay until he does or something....for a number of reasons. As I entered the room, Lenny stands up and greets me with a firm hug. "Thanks, Jen. I know this is probably the last place you want to be."
"Not the last, not the first, but not the last either." I chuckle. "Is he still conscious?"
"Barely..."
"So why do you think he is still asking to see me? I've come several times lately. I don't think we have anything left to say to each other." I say, not trying to sound rude.
"I don't know..." Lenny begins, but is cut off by a faint voice.
"Jensen? Is that you?" Sy manages to get out in a whisper.
"Yes. I'm here. How are you?" I reply, stepping up to his bed.
"They love them Jensen. They love Devon and Waverly so much." He chokes out.
"Awe. Who does?" I ask, a little bewildered since he had never even met my children. I didn't even know he knew their names. Obviously Lenny and Mayte must have talked to him about them. I assume that is who he is referring to that loves them. Probably about to tell me to keep them in my life or something to guilt me.
"They watch over them." He continues, without addressing my question. That was confirmation to me that he was meaning Lenny and Mayte.
"Yes, they have watched them for us several times. We are forever grateful...."
"They love the boy too. He's with them now..."
"The boy? What boy?" I ask, with a slight giggle.
"He will be here soon. They are sending him to you."
I look at Lenny, raising my eyebrows to non verbally ask what or who he is talking about. Lenny shrugs his shoulders. "Dad, Jensen has two daughters, remember? Not any boys...."
Sy interrupts without hesitation. "But they want me to tell you that carrying Lenny's baby is a mistake. Don't do it...."
"Um, Sy, Lenny and I have never had any kids together. We never even had a pregnancy..."
"It will bring your family great sorrow." Sy says, almost like he is on a mission to deliver some sort of urgent message.
"Dad, she's not having a baby, much less my baby. She's married to Prince. And we aren't having an affair or anything so there's nothing to worry about. Everyone's good and happy. We want you to be at peace knowing that." Lenny interjects.
"Find another way for them. There's other ways..."
"Ok. I will." I say, hoping to appease him since rationalizing with him wasn't in the cards. He was too far gone. "Just go with it." I whisper to Lenny, who nods in agreement and tries to change the subject. "Dad, how are feeling? Do you need anything?"
"I'm ready to go now. I'm ready for God to take me home." He announces, his voice suddenly sounding even weaker.
Feeling that he was going to pass at any moment, I really wanted to leave, but how could I do that without looking extremely insensitive. Just as I think Lenny was about to give me an out and tell me I could leave, Mayte comes through the door. "Hey, baby!" Lenny smiles, his eyes lighting up. "Why are you here so late?"
Thinking she was going to get upset that I was here, instead of her, I was surprised to see her greet us both with a huge grin. "I couldn't sleep anyway. How is he?" Her face looking like it was straining to turn somber.
I step back as they approach each other. "Are you still feeling bad, sugar? Why couldn't you sleep?" Lenny asks quietly, stroking her arms up and down. I tried to look away, but not at Sy either, so the floor seemed like a good alternative as I again tried to think how to leave.
"I'm actually great now. I have something I want to tell you." She glances over at me, taking a deep breath, and smiling. Suddenly I realize she is about to tell him how she truly feels about him and their future like we discussed on the phone. I gave her a reassuring nod, and got the cue I needed to leave.
"Well I've really got to get going. Prince didn't want me out long this late. You never know when I might fly off the handle or something." I chuckle, and run into a chair, trying to scramble out of the room. "There's a chair there." I announce as I turn my back to leave.
"Jen?" Lenny clears his throat. I turn to face him as I swing my purse over my shoulder. "Thanks for coming. I really think he was waiting to talk to you before he would let himself pass on. It didn't make much sense, but I think he's at peace now."
"Oh, yeah, you're welcome. I'm afraid it was mainly gibberish, but hopefully it fulfilled whatever he needed to move on..."
"What did he say?" Maybe interjected curiously.
"Oh." I chuckle. "I'll just tell you tomorrow at the party. I've really got to get..."
"Actually Jensen, do you mind waiting a few minutes? I want to talk to you before you leave...about the party." Mayte gives me a little wink.
"Sure. I'm going to go grab a coffee. Meet me in the lobby?" I suggest.
"Perfect." She smiles, then turns her attention back to Lenny as I finally make my way out of the room.
I'm really happy that Mayte was about to pour her heart out and from the look on his face when she entered the room, I had no doubt Lenny felt the same way. But I really wish she just wanted to chat about it tomorrow. I was exhausted and I knew I probably had at least one round of sex waiting for me when I got home. And I had to get up early to start the birthday celebration and preparations. I really don't know why she wants to cut her time with Lenny short to come run out and tell me how much they love each other when it could easily wait until tomorrow. Plus I'm a little nervous her speech may get interrupted by Sy passing. Then I'm stuck out here waiting even longer, or worse, have to go back in to see him dead. Maybe I just need to call Prince and tell him he's going to have to just rub one out tonight...
"Oh my god!" Mayte shrieks from behind, startling me to the point that I spilled the top part of my coffee on my shirt.
"Hot!" I scream, fanning my chest.
"Shit! Sorry!" Mayte apologizes, grabbing some napkins off a nearly table and blotting my shirt.
"So how did it go?" I asked, hoping she will spit in out so we could celebrate quickly and I could leave.
"Jensen, oh my god! You've got to tell me what to do?!"
"Oh Mayte!" I groan, rolling my eyes. "He feels the same way. I'm sure of it! I'll bet all my money, well all Prince's money, on it. If I'm wrong, you can...."
"I'm pregnant!" She blurts out, causing me to once again, spill coffee on myself.