American Woman: Book 4

Chapter 43

"Nothing. Just forget it. It's not important right  now." I tried to escape the conversation. "Dr. Curren will be here soon..."
"Did he try something with you?" Prince insisted, obviously not going to let this go easily.
"No." I chuckle, attempting to keep it light.
"Then what? You said he was willing to do things with you. Oh my god! You made a pass at him?!" Prince shrieked, his eyes growing as big as saucers.
"No. I mean yes..." I stutter.
"Which one? Yes or no?!" He demanded.
"Yes, but only bc I thought he was you." I clarified, hoping he would drop it.
"How in the hell did you think he was me? Did you go temporarily blind?" He growled.
"No but it was dark and I was in bed, half asleep..."
"What the fuck was he doing coming into your bedroom..."
"Well technically it was his bedroom..."
"Oh excuse me! Let me rephrase. What the fuck was he doing coming into HIS bedroom when he knew you were in bed? Trying to get some, as I suspected." He grumbled.
"Not even close. It was the night of the Grammys so he was back in LA and I guess decided to come home since it is his home! He was just letting me know he was there."
"So he was just being courteous?" Prince sarcastically asked.
"Actually yes..."
"Oh bullshit! Wake up and smell the roses Jensen..."
"Prince just let it go. Please. This is not even important right now..."
"The hell it ain't! Did you cheat on me with him?!" He demanded.
"No..."
"Did you kiss him?"
"Yes, but..."
"So kissing isn't cheating?! Wow thanks for that clarification. Didn't know we went by those rules..."
"I didn't say that. It was all a big misunderstanding. I swear. I thought he was you..."
"And who did he think you were?" Prince smirked.
"Well me I guess..."
"Exactly! So how can you stand there and say..."
"He knew we weren't together obviously since I had been crashing at his place for weeks. He didn't initiate it, I mistakenly did. I think most men would go along with it." I explain.
"If he was still wanting to fuck you then..."
"Then what Prince? Have you been in love with every woman you've fucked?! Or did you sometimes just want to have sex?!"
"It's different! Y'all were married! There were feelings involved at some point, if not still."
"There isn't those feelings there anymore. God! How many times do I have to tell you that?! I'm sick of having the same damn argument! I really thought you had finally let this go...."
"Well I had until you two apparently got it on..."
"We didn't get it on." I huffed and rolled my eyes. "I wanted it to be you. When I realized it wasn't, I stopped it immediately.
"Oh you wanted it to be me?! So if I just randomly fuck some chick bc I want her to be you, that's cool?!"
"No! I guess I wanted it to be you so bad my mind made me think it was you...."
"So when you realized it wasn't my dick..."
"Prince stop! I didn't see or touch his dick."
"So how far did you get before you realized he wasn't me? And what made you realize it wasn't me?" He continued.
"I don't know something he said I guess. I thought it was you and then I realized it wasn't and I told him to get off of me..."
"Get off of you?! So he was on you?!" He panicked.
"Not like that..."
"Then like what? How far did it get Jensen?!"
"I don't remember..."
"Bullshit! Don't you dare lie to me...." He was cut off by the sound of the front gate being buzzed.
"That's probably the doctor. This conversation is over. I'm going to let him in." I announced.
"This conversation is on hold, not over. I can't believe you think I'm going to be able to concentrate on anything else right now. All I'm going to be doing is picturing you and Lenny having sex..."
"We didn't! Ok? Please just put it out of your mind. There was nothing to it." I demanded, exiting the room quickly before he could continue.
Dr. Curren could almost immediately tell something was off and demanded whatever was going on get resolved before continuing. "It is just a misunderstanding. We are fine to continue." I assure him while Prince scowled at both of us.
"With all due respect Jensen, I am the professional here. When clients are consumed with something else, they tend not to hear my advice, much less take it. I need both of you as clear minded and focused as possible, especially at the beginning when it's the toughest for everyone. I suggest getting Laura over here..."
"I think that's a great idea." Prince smirks, getting his way as usual.
"Fine." I agreed.
Luckily Laura was already planning on coming over today so she just came earlier than expected and took us into our normal meeting area. Dr. Curren left and said to call him when we felt we were ready for his guidance.
"Ok what is this big issue that needs to be resolved? If it's the state of your marriage, that's just going to need to wait a bit." Laura began.
"Well this might determine if there is even anything to save." Prince huffed.
I knew the shock was written all over my face.
"What does that mean?" I asked. "Depending on how far Lenny and I went will determine if you want to even stay married? Last night you were begging for me to be with you..."
"That's before I knew Lenny..."
"Ok. Stop. Back up." Laura commanded. "First of all, Prince you don't need to be making threats like that. If you honestly love Jensen they way you claim, you would be able to get over an affair...."
"I didn't have an affair!!!!" I exclaim.
"Jensen, calm down. I'm hoping you didn't, but even if you did, many marriages have and can survive that. So I am assuming there is at least some merit to Prince's claim since you said something about how far you and Lenny went. So you have been in contact with him?" Laura asked, looking a little frustrated.
"Yes, but not like that. When I left here with the girls Christmas night, you know I asked Lenny if I could stay at his LA house."
"Yes." Laura answered. "But I thought he lived in the Bahamas."
"He does, but he comes back to LA sometimes. His daughter and other things are still there. He came back for the Grammys last week and came into the bedroom where I was sleeping to just tell me he was there. I thought he was Prince..."
"Ok. So Prince, she thought he was you. What is the problem here? She obviously doesn't want to be with him or she probably would be." Laura boldly told him.
"The problem is, he knew who it was and apparently went for it. And I want to know how far it went." He huffed and crossed his arms like a child pouting.
"Your first statement is reasonable. There could be some lingering feelings on Lenny's part if he was willing to be with her physically. Or he could have just been horny..."
"Exactly!" I shriek.
"Jensen, not now." Laura ordered. "Either way, how he feels about Jensen doesn't matter. How Jensen feels does and she is over Lenny. She is way passed that. You're the one still hung up on it to a degree. So that's on you, not her or him. I think you may have been passed it mostly and this could have stirred it up. That's understandable. Her staying at their house they shared together is probably not ideal...."
"And she left our daughters with him!" Prince exclaims.
"Ok, that's an issue for later." Laura winces, giving me the sense she wasn't real keen on that decision. "Let's address the second part of what you said. Why do you care how far they got or didn't get? Again she thought he was you...."
"But it wasn't! I think I have a right to know how far my wife went sexually with another man!" Prince was growing more agitated.
"I have already told you how far it went and look what it got me!" I scream, pointing to my throat.
Prince looked away in shame. "I'm sorry." He mumbled. "I was high. I don't remember any of it. I wish I could get you to understand that."
"Prince, think about you are asking Jensen to do. To just forgive you and get over it bc you were high. Ok we have a mountain of work to do. The only thing we are addressing today is enough to get Prince over this stumbling block of the mistaken identity. Nothing else. Not that Lenny has the kids. Or all the stuff that happened when Jensen returned. Not the drug use. That is all going to take time and we need to get you to Dr. Curren asap bc I can tell from your agitation you are starting some withdrawal symptoms. So what can get you passed this little hiccup enough to move forward for today?" Laura questioned Prince.
"I want to know how far it went." He pushed.
Laura sighed and was quiet for a minute. "Jensen, I think he needs to know that you didn't have sex with Lenny...."
"I've already told him that." I muttered.
"That's not enough. I want to know what happened!" Prince growled.
"Prince if she was to do that, how do we know you won't fly off the handle if it's more than what..."
"I already know they kissed! That's more than I am ok with! But I may can get passed that. But there's some stuff I am not sure I can!"
"So what would be that line? What could you not get over?" I asked him.
"No, don't answer that!" Laura butted in. "That's not a good idea Jensen. Bc if he answered and you say it didn't get that far, he's just going to think you lied to satisfy him. If you are comfortable with it, just lead him though what happened."
"Ok." I reluctantly agreed.
"Prince, I will tell her to stop if you start verbally abusing her or start getting violent. Then you won't even get to know. At least not today. Do you understand?" Laura warned him.
He nodded his head and swallowed hard. He leaned forward, putting his elbows on his knees and his hands though his hair, staring at the floor. I assume he was trying to mentally prepare himself for what he was about to hear and trying to stay calm.
"Ok he came in the room and said something about he was there. I was in a deep sleep and honestly thought it was Prince. I knew the Grammys were that night so maybe he was in LA. Lenny truly didn't even cross my mind. I thought Prince had come to make up and I was just so relieved and wanted my family back together. So I raised up and started kissing him and telling him I forgave him. Well apparently that made sense to Lenny so he kissed me back. Then I asked why he wasn't at the Grammys and he said he was so I asked why they said he wasn't when he won and he laughed and said he didn't win. I did think that was strange but shrugged it off that maybe I just dreamed he won. I had gone to bed without clothes on..."
"Why?!" Prince growled, not taking his eyes off the ground. "Why would you be naked in bed when you knew Lenny could come back..."
"Honestly, bc I was so stressed before I went to bed I was trying to get off, if you must know. Sorry Laura." I sheepishly look at her.
"You're not going to say anything that will phase me." She said assuringly.
"I wore myself out with no luck and passed out. Anyway, I didn't let him take any of my clothes off my but since I was nude, he did make his way down to my breasts." I started to hesitate, especially once I saw Prince squirm in his chair and let out a loud sigh.
"What happened?!" He demanded.
"He just did what men do to women's breasts. But not for long." I added. "He made some comment about how big they were..."
Prince shifted and groaned again, bouncing his knees up and down.
"I said bc of breastfeeding and he made a comment about not being able to believe I had kids. So that was my first true inkling maybe it wasn't you. Then he started to make his way down between my legs with his hand and said something with 'sugar' and I instantly knew it was Lenny and confirmed it by asking and told him to stop and he did. End of story."
"Ok. Prince, how does that make you feel?" Laura asked.
"Is that a for real question?!" He shrieked, his face now buried in his hands.
"What I mean is was it better or worse than what you had imagined?" Laura tried again.
"Better, but I'm still pissed." He confirmed. "I don't like to think about him kissing her. Or touching her. It literally makes me want to kill him."
"I understand. But she was only letting you do that if you really think about it. She thought he was you. She was allowing you to kiss and touch her...."
"But it wasn't me. I feel like I've been cheated on. I know it wasn't on purpose but that's how I feel." He finally looks at me. "I mean how would you feel if you found out I kissed another woman? Had her breasts in my hands and mouth? Touched her between her thighs?"
"I would be devastated. Have you?" I asked.
"No!" He shouted. "This is about what you did."
"How would you even know if you've done those things or not?! You get high and don't even know what has happened..."
"Time out!!!! We are bird walking again." Laura orders. "Prince, can you tolerate this enough to meet with Dr. Curren today? It is dire as get your recovery started. We can always come back to this and all the other issues. But can you now put it out of your mind for a day to focus on that? Now that you know they didn't even do much and that the little that was done was bc Jensen thought you had come to her." Laura asked, almost desperately.
Prince nodded and stood up. "Yeah I've got to get this shit over with. Lenny doesn't need to be with my girls much longer. It's apparent he would be with Jensen in a heartbeat, given the chance. I can't have him trying to steal my daughters too!"