worlds pass by | dear evan hansen

Chapter 25

Today would have been Kasey and Jace's wedding.

The thought cast a shadow over the entirety of the day. Renee couldn't bear to be in her apartment today. She could only imagine what Kasey was going through- what it must be like, to know that today would have been the happiest day of her life.

Instead of worrying about what the wedding would be like, instead, Kasey had to decide how she was going to announce Jace's death to the public.

The day after he'd committed suicide, she individually called and told everyone invited to the wedding. 

For Renee, it was one of the hardest phone calls she'd ever had. Hearing the stress and grief in Kasey's voice was difficult to hear. Renee didn't how Kasey had managed to hold herself together over the phone.

She hoped no one else would ever have to go through what Kasey was going through. It seemed unimaginable. 

Her heart broke when Kasey finally posted the announcement for the fans on her Instagram, under a beautiful picture of her and Jace walking in the snow.

@kaseywinslow:

I could never have imagined making this kind of announcement on the date of my wedding. Today was supposed to be the day I married my best friend, my partner-in-crime, my person.

Instead... With great sadness I must announce to his friends and fans that Jace committed suicide on November 24, 2018. 

I ask that you respect the privacy of everyone, including myself, as we grieve and honor Jace's life and memory.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mike was in shock. 

He'd met Jace several times during Kasey's run in Dear Evan Hansen. He'd seen the show multiple times, and he'd always come backstage after the show. He was incredibly complimentary and appreciative of the cast.

They'd even hung out for a while, while the girls talked. 

Jace seemed like a great guy, and a perfect fit for Kasey. Mike could tell how much they loved each other. Their relationship had always seemed like a fairy-tale to Mike- something beautiful, something everyone should strive for.

He never would have thought that Jace would commit suicide, knowing what it would do to Kasey. Knowing what she'd already been through. 

Mike wished that the message of the show had gotten through to him. Maybe Jace wouldn't have, if Mike had noticed. If he'd been more observant, if he'd talked to him. 

So this was what it was it felt like, when something like this happened.

Olivia performed as Zoe for the days that Kasey was gone. Mike could tell that she struggled with that burden, too. 

Mike was sitting in his dressing room, just staring at the mirror, when there was a knock on his door. 

"Hey, Mike," Rachel said. Mike turned. His friend looked worn out, exhausted, even. Her eyes were downcast, and even with the makeup, she still looked sad. Not herself.

"Hey, what's up?" Mike swiveled in his chair.

"I think we need to do something. Anything, for Kasey, for Jace's family. Something. I can't stand it, with-" 

Tears starting running down Rachel's face and she furiously wiped them away. "The wedding was supposed to be today," she said after standing there in silence.

Mike swallowed. "I know."

"I can't even imagine how Kasey is feeling right now. To have to piece together what happened like she has to... to try and pull her life back together now..."

"She should be the happiest girl in the world right now. She deserves to be the happiest girl in the world," Mike said forcefully, unable to keep the anger out of his voice. "Instead she's planning her fiancee's funeral."

Rachel wiped away another tear. 

"It's just not fair!" Mike continued, jumping up from his chair. All the anger and frustration from the last few days was finally coming out, a torrent of emotion that he'd been trying to keep down inside. "How could he do this to her? How could you do that to someone you loved? Kill yourself?"

"Jace never wanted to hurt her," Rachel reminded him. "That's not why he did it, I'm sure of that. It was never to hurt Kasey."

"But he must have known. He must have known what it was going to do. To her."

"Mike!" Rachel shouted. "Take a deep breath. I know it's hard. We're all having a hard time. It's something no one should ever have to go through, believe me. But right now, we just have to get through it. For her. We need to be there for her."

"It just seems so unfair. Just when she was starting to be happy..."

"I know."