Saving Grace

Chapter XXIII

Bold text = German
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"So ein hübscher kleiner Schatten..." The huge guard's hand trailed down her face then down her side. She subconsciously trembled in fear and disgust at his touch. "Hydras kleiner Schatten..." he murmured in her ear, causing her to cringe at his closeness. "Ich Frage mich, ob es dem Soldaten erlaubt ist, genauso viel Vergnügen mit dir zu haben, wie wir...wir werden unseren kleinen Schatten vermissen..." he continued as he began to pull up the hem of her shirt.  

"No! Please, no!" she pleaded, tears running down her face, knowing what was to come...

Grace's eyes flew open as innumerable scenes of the same kind flooded her mind in torrents. Suddenly, she felt very small, weak, and dirty.

After her labored breathing returned to normal, she momentarily considered going to Steve and tell him what happened, but she quickly dismissed the idea. He was sleeping and probably would mad if she disturbed him. She had already caused him to sleep in the living room instead of his own bed. Grace laid back down, but could not get the pain-filled memories out of her mind. After tossing and turning for a few hours, she fell into an uneasy sleep. However, her memories continued to haunt her in her dreams.

For the next two nights, the same thing happened. She would have horrific dreams that ended with her waking up coated in a film of sweat and an excruciating headache. Steve and Bucky grew concerned about Grace. The dark circles beneath her eyes only deepened, and she grew quiet. She also became nervous if she was left alone with any man other than Steve or Bucky. Every time she was asked what was wrong, she denied anything was amiss.

She had to be strong. Eventually, she would be punished for showing too much weakness. It always happened. However, on the third night, her nightmares were worse than ever. She woke sobbing and all she could think about was getting somewhere safe.

BOOM! Four-year-old Grace threw the cover back on her bed and dashed into her brother's room because Ma was not back from her late shift at the hospital.

"St-Stevie? You here?"

"Yes, Gracie, I'm here."

"You awake?"

"Yes, silly. I'm talking to ya, aren't I?"

BOOM!

"I don't like the thunderstorm. Sounds angry."

"Come 'ere, Gracie. I won't let the storm hurt you."

"I can stay with you?"

"Just this once."

Grace dashed across the floor, throwing herself up onto her older brother's bed. He pulled back the quilt and let her settle down beside him before tucking it in around her shoulders. "It's a good thing I love you, Gracie."

Stevie. Stevie had promised he would never let a man touch her again, just like he had said he would not let the thunderstorm hurt her. Tossing her covers back, she stumbled into the living room, dropping down beside the couch as her sobs threatened to overcome her.

"Grace?" Steve asked blearily. He had woken from a deep sleep to his sister's crumpled form by his side, sobbing. "Grace? Gracie, what's wrong?"

"So many...hurts..." she trailed off into an incoherent jumble of German and English as she cried.

Steve sat up and gently laid a hand on her shoulder. "Did you have a nightmare?"

Through her tears, she nodded. "Had many..."

Steve could guess what she had dreamed about. "Oh Grace, why didn't you come to me before?" Carefully pulling her up into his lap, he held her close as she cried into his chest.

"'Fraid of making you angry," she managed to answer.

"You never have to worry about making me angry, Grace." He gently tilted her head back so he could see her face. "I will never hurt you. Never."

Slowly, Grace nodded.

"And I don't care what time it is or what it's for; you need me, call me or come find me," he continued earnestly. "I'm here for you no matter what, okay?"

Grace nodded again and laid her head on his chest, her hand instinctively enclosing a handful of his shirt, just like when she was little. Steve smiled softly at it, and held her tighter, stroking her curly hair, knowing it would help to calm her.

Grace felt, for the first time in since HYDRA had taken her, completely, utterly safe. Eventually, her crying subsided into sniffles, and Steve raised her chin once more to look her in the eye.

"Do you want to go back to bed, or stay out here with me?" he asked, giving her the choice to deal with her nightmares whichever way she needed.

"C-can stay?" she asked hesitantly, thinking back to when he had let her stay with him throughout the thunderstorm when they were little.

"Of course," Steve said. "If that's what you need."

"Want to stay," she answered softly.

"Okay." Grabbing the blanket he had been asleep under, Steve scooped Grace up and moved to the roomy recliner Bucky usually sat in. He pulled the lever to make the footrest pop out and leaned back a little bit. Grace settled down at his side, her legs draped across his lap, and laid her head on his shoulder as he spread the blanket out over them. A blurry but recognizable parade of memories little things Steve did that made Grace feel safe and cared for streamed through her tired mind.

"Thank you, Stevie," she whispered.

"What for?"

"Keeping safe."

"Grace, I will always do my best to keep you safe." Steve pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "Always." In response, Grace snuggled closer, wrapping an arm across his torso. In minutes, her breathing evened out in slumber as Steve continued running his fingers comfortingly through her hair. Soon, even he grew sleepy, whispering into his sister's soft curls as he drifted off. "I love you, Gracie."

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German translation curtesty of Australielover, my new Fanfiction.net friend who is actually German.

So ein hübscher kleiner Schatten... Such a pretty little shadow...

Hydras kleiner Schatten... HYDRA's little shadow...

Ich Frage mich, ob es dem Soldaten erlaubt ist, genauso viel Vergnügen mit dir zu haben, wie wir...wir werden unseren kleinen Schatten vermissen...I wonder if the Soldier will be allowed to take as much pleasure from you as we are...We will miss our little Shadow...

So viele... So many...