Falling For Him Anyway

Chapter 44

Video: When 21 savage was recording 'Bank Account' by Lenarr.

Gwendolyn

Xavier worked another 2 months on the nursery. It only took him this long because he only spent the weekends on it.

He did all of his work Friday through Sunday and spent the rest of the week with me.

We cuddled. Which mostly consisted of naps or him craddling my growing stomach. It grew faster than a normal pregnancy because I was having twins.

We went to the beach. We went out to lunch during work hours. He took me to buy new clothes. He was patient with me and my mood swings.

We went to see my family for Christmas and we got to see Cynthia's new baby for New Years.

Chase and Xavier actually got along better than I thought they would. I simply told them both that if they couldn't share me neither of them could have me.

They worked out their differences and it wasn't long before Chase stopped growling at Xavier and Xavier stopped refusing to take Chase on walks.

I still hadn't admitted to him that I loved him.

I couldn't bring myself to break my own heart.

For the first time in my life I was scared to talk to somebody.

So I had to force myself to do.

These were my thoughts as we lay in bed, tangled around each other.

My protruding stomach in between us, my arms around it and his arms around me.

I would tell him at work tomorrow so if I was let down Evelyn would be able to comfort me.

In the morning I was up early due to anxiety. I had to find something to ease my nerves.

I cooked, cleaned, showered and got dressed. Nothing seemed to help until he woke up, kissing me good morning.

It only helped a little but it got me through the car ride.

He kissed my forehead before we parted ways to our workplaces.

I paced my office and I was literally about to explode when Evelyn finally arrived.

"I can't do this." I whined.

"Yes you can. The Gwendolyn I know wouldn't be scared to do this." Evelyn shook my shoulders.

"But I'm not the Gwendolyn you know." I said. "I'm a six months pregnant Gwendolyn that has no idea what the fuck she's doing."

"Gwendolyn out of all the times in life you could have gave up you didn't." She pulled me to my feet. "So I don't give a damn how you do it you're just gonna do it."

She pushed me out of my office.

I pulled myself together. Time to walk the plank. "Evelyn what do you think will happen?"

"Worst case scenario he breaks something mental in you and I'm going to break something physical on him." She gives me a fierce look. "Best case scenario he loves you back, you have your babies."

We were almost outside his office door now.

"You're right. I'm gonna handle this like I handle everything else." I said and marched up to the door.

"Not quite right but close enough." Evelyn started walking back the other way. "I'll keep everyone away from you."

Just as I reached to knock on the door it swung open revealing Xavier himself leaning against the door frame.

"Xavier we need to talk." My resolve shattered at the sight of him.

He stepped aside letting me into the office and shutting the door behind me.

He locked the door and his arms wrapped around me from behind. "What's bothering you?"

I turned around in his arms, needing to look him in his eyes when I say these fateful words.

His mismatched eyes watched me curiously. "Gwendolyn?"

I was having an internal debate with myself and to be honest, the negative side was winning.

'Speak now or forever hold your peace' The positive side told me.

Xavier kissed my lips, bringing me back to reality. "Gwendolyn tell me what's bothering you."

He kissed my neck giving me room to speak. "Xavier I-"

"Be honest with me Gwendolyn." He bit down on my sweet spot and squeezed my butt at the same resulting in a soft moan slipping past my lips.

"Xavier be serious for a minute." I breathed out.

He pulled back. "Tell me what's bothering you so I can make it better."

"Xavier I want you to keep an open mind about this." I backed out of his embrace.

"Ok." He looked confused.

The words were on the tip of my tounge but they went no further.

He stepped forward to embrace me again. "Gwendolyn you don't have t-"

"I love you Xavier."

*****

Anyone else think of that song by Usher. These are my confessions.

Whatever. I'm crazy but I embrace it.

Word of the update:

Commodity.

A: Mangos?

P.S. I was on google today (Don't ask why) and I was amazed to see the cover of 'falling for him anyway' on google under wattpad's URL.

I would do a back flip if:

1.) I knew how to do a back flip.

And

2.) If I wasn't lazy AF

And

3.) If I wasn't excited to write the next chapter.

Leah💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋