Burning Love

Friend

    What did I do to deserve this friend?
To be the doormat of which you step on with muddied boots,
Not a thought pondered over your head of my thoughts or feelings.

No, I was simply a thing to use,
A dairy to list woes,
And a warm body hold onto when He wasn't there.

Yes, He,
The one who left you crying in my arms because He broke your heart again,
And again,
And again.

He whom decided cheating was better than you,
Who thought disregarding your trust was worth while,
The one who "needed guy time" all the time to get away from you.

But you love Him,
Not only love,
But Love Him.

Your Knight in Shining armor right?
Just makes you feel peachy?

    How about the Friend you left behind?
The one you you'd always be there for,
The one you made akin to blood in your mind?

At first I was happy for you friend,
I was happy that He made you feel special,
Then I saw how He treated you and how you didn't have a care in the world,
Till the load became too hard to bear,
And who was your shoulder to cry on?
To pick you up and brush you off?
Not Him.

    The stupid thing?
I let you do it,
The stepping on,
The using,
The absolutely vile way you treat me.
I do it because I do love you friend,
Not in a way that He ever will,
But a way a sister does to a sister.

By letting them see that their goals can be met through hard work,
And that yeah life is shitty right now but things do get better.
No I can't provide Love and feed your fantasies of your Knight swooping in on a noble steed,
But I can tell you He is only a beggar and a coward riding on the back of your great deeds friend.

    But you will never hear these words,
Never in a million years,
Not if I whisper or talk or shout or yell or scream them in your ear,
Because I'm just me,
What do I know about Love.

Author's Note:
    I feel as though this one is self-evident but it's not my normal love poem. No this one is about platonic love for another whom I care very deeply about and will time  that will time and time again use me as an excuse to be near someone when her fiancé can't. And I don't agree with the engagement at all, and she knows, but she 'Loves' him. Even admits that this might be a mistake one day, yet goes through with it. -- But that's neither here nor there, the fact is this poem is about a friend who genuinely, platonically, loves their best friend and is being used by them -- and is okay with it in a very dumb way yet van't bring themselves to cut them out of their life. More updates to come as I am slowly writing more. Till next time -- ~Jenny