REALITY- a goofed up nightmare ( nanowrimo13)

chap 32

We were now talking in whispers.

I sighed rubbing my palm over my face and running my hands in my hair.

"You shouldn't spend your money on me. Its not a great think. Moreover, I don't like it." I was happy Aarsh was making efforts to make me happy and feel special but he didn't need to buy me gifts for that.

He was just staring at me.

"Got something to say?" I asked sitting on the edge of the bed.

He came and sat beside me.

"You know, I don't want you mom to be wild at you for wasting your money on me. She doesn't like me, I get that. But I don't want to give her more reasons to hate me.

Besides, to make me happy, you don't have to buy stuffs or spend money. I am not materialistic you know." I was sad, even after two years he couldn't know what I was.

"So? Are done now?" He asked calmly.

I nodded in agreement.

"I know you are not materialistic, I think I know you that much after two years to know what you are." he continued with a tinch on sad eyes.

"You are a silly girl, I thought you knew me better." he sighed.

"This doesn't even make sense as to why you spend so much on me." I replied.

"Haven't you figured out yet, I generally never make sense." Aarsh whispered.

"You are really difficult to comprehend, you know." I mumbled.

"That is what I think." he added smiling.

"I am crazy and over think and over react. That's kind of easy to figure." I replied.

"You don't give yourself enough credit you know. You are too understanding and sweet. You should be harsh to me. I am stupid most of the time."

"And I feel like kicking that harsh ass many times because you always seem to confuse me. I want to know what's going on in that skull of yours. You are just too hard on yourself and specially perfect at spoiling me rotten." I tried changing the topic to cheer him up.

His eyes looked sad.

"My life is screwed up, you make it better. Your smile can make me cheer in the worst of moods. You actually understand the real me and accept what I am, You never asked me to change. I know I am not perfect and you can get someone way better than me, but you are still with me since two years and that two years have been the time where my confidence and self esteem weren't a screwed up bitch anymore.

You make me happy and I scared to loose you.

I am being selfish here, but I really love you.

I don't waste my money on you, I have more than enough to spend on myself, I want to spoil you, pamper you, do everything in my power to make you smile. I just like buying things for you. That make me happy when you wear or use my bought gifts." He whispered.

I did hear the love declaration he just said but presumed since he was talking his heart out, it just slipped.

He may not mean it.

I didn't want my hopes up and them crash them down. Now that would hurt.

We were talking in whispers again, the way we did when we were talking on serious things. When we were sharing out hearts out, the secrets we never could share otherwise.

Aarsh wasn't the planning type of guy, he always acted upon what he thought, while I was the one who over thought.

I didn't realize when we were talking we were laying on our back our fingers interwined.