"Hello?"
"Is your house on fire?"
"No...?"
"Man, I thought it was because you're so dang hot."
"I think you need to work on that."
...
One prank call
One girl
One guy
One great story
*********
Cover by RaghaddMurad
Highest Rating: #1 in short story
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Ring, ring
"Hel-"
"You know you say the same exact thing every time you answer the phone?"
"It's because you don't deserve anything other then a simple 'hello'"
"You wound me greatly. Anyways, today I called you for one reason, and one reason alone."
"Which is...?"
"..."
"..."
"..."
"You do know your over-exaggerated pause has no effect whatsoever, right?"
"Thanks for ruining my vibe."
"It was my pleasure."
"You're evil."
"As I've been told."
"Anyways, the reason for my call was so we could get to know each other. As you've said, how can we criticize one another without knowing their name? So today, we shall formally introduce ourselves."
"..."
"..."
"..."
"STOP LAUGHING!!! What's funny about getting to know each other?"
"Its just that, you sounded actually serious about doing this, like we would become friends or something just because you keep calling me."
"That's exactly what I meant."
"..."
"I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T STOP LAUGHING I WILL FIND OUT WHERE YOU LIVE AND MURDER YOU IN YOUR SLEEP!!!!"
"Fine. If you're actually serious about this, you can start by telling me your name."
"My name is Oliver."
"Like Oliver Green?"
"No, as in Oliver Lewellan. And just so you know, I am seventeen years of age, so I am not a stalkerish forty-seven year old."
"Okay, Oliver Green."
"That's not my name."
"Oliver Green."
"That's not my name."
"Oliver Green."
"That's not my... You know what, I'm not even going to try."
"Good."
"Har, har. What's your name, Ms. I'm-so-funny-because-I change-people's-last-names?"
"Do you really want to know?"
"Yes."
"Do you really, really want to know?"
"Yes!"
"Do you really, really, really want to know?"
"JUST TELL ME ALREADY WOMEN!!!!"
"My name is.... Batman."
Beeeeep
"You did not just hang up on me!!"
"I know you can't hear me, but I want you to die..."
