ONISM (rewriting)

chap 57

~ Y A W A R ~

I scrolled over instagram and stopped at a page that delivered news about what was happening in my homeland. 'Ramadan Mubarak. Moon has been sighted by many citizens across Rawalpindi, Lala Moosa, Jhelum, Kohat and Laki Marwat. Mufti Sahab himself confirmed the news by witnessing the moon in Islamabad. Tomorrow we will be observing the first fast in Pakistan of the Holy month.'

I pulled in a deep breath. It was yet evening at my place. So I had a few more hours until i offered taraweeh. I tried to get up off the sofa in my living room but the wave of pain shooting back and forth in the left side of my head had me lay back again.

I originally had flu which led me to have a slight fever and now an extreme headache. Two tablets of painkillers had me survive the cafe hours but now as the pain came back a little stronger than before and my own analgesic system failing to obscure it, I laid helplessly on the sofa and tried to recharge my batteries.

Turning off the phone I placed it over the table next to me and pulled the Afghan up to my chin and cuddled into the cushions. I was drifting in and out of consciousness, my half awake mind dropped a few warning signals but I could no longer hold my eyes open.

When I regained my consciousness, I couldn't move my neck was stiff because of sore muscles. There was a faint layer of sweat over my forehead. My body felt too heavy to budge. I touched my forehead to wipe the sweat but flinched at how warm I was. This wasn't normal.

I stretched my arm and my phone up from the table only to have a minor heart attack. 11:20 PM? How long had I been kipping for? I only wanted to take a post-work nap. I frenetically scrolled the notification banner down and saw that there were multiple messages from Sanha and one from community group about the timing of Taraweeh at the mosque.

I had missed it. I had missed the first taraweeh prayer.

I slowly got up from the sofa, holding the left side of my head. I was a little bit dizzy. My nose and throat were totally blocked and my eyes were watering. I shambled to kitchen and had a spoonful of cough syrup. I started to boil two eggs for myself and used the steam water to inhale in order to unclog my respiratory system.

I swallowed the peppered eggs down which fomented my throat to some extent. I performed ablution and performed the Fardh prayer. I sat on my quilted prayer mat in my bedroom. Every time I bowed down in sujood, it felt as if the food was regurgitating back into my oesophagus and swallowed the bile as I'd sit in tashahud.

I felt horrible, it was first night of the blessed month and I had no zeal in me to go for taraweeh prayers. I persuaded myself that I'd lay down for a bit in bed and offer the rest of the prayer in the tahajud hours because taraweeh was an actual tahajud prayer.

After what felt like an eternity, I opened my eyes again. I thanked Allah and hopped off my bed weakly, thinking of my pending prayer. I checked my phone and I had to close it, looked around for a bit and then glanced back at it.

4:12 AM?

Were my eyes seeing the right time? I had a few minutes before the Sahoor time ended. I rushed off to the bathroom, stumbling midway as a wave of vertigo hit me. After freshening up, I offered my witr prayer. A bit ashamed that i hadn't offered a single set of taraweeh.

I warmed up the water for myself to drink as I surfed through the drawers in kitchen. I had brought with myself some sachets of chopped herbs that were really soothing to sore throats. When I found them tugged underneath a bag of cardboard, I hurriedly split the packet using my teeth and sprinkled it in the steaming water and later on added some dried green tea.