Deception Of Obsessive-Devotion (Chaennie/Chaesoo)

Chapter 5

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"You're here for detention not to sleep, Ms. Park!" I clamoured when I encountered her leaning against one of the shelves of the library instead of stacking the books.

She seemed melancholy, she went back to her work and my heart ached for more glances. Why was she unhappy? She wasn't even conversing today and the silence made me frightened because I cared, because the heartsickness in her eyes wasn't something she deserved. She truly needs a hug and I'm not the one who can offer her that.

"I'm sorry..." she uttered piling the books consequently not even limiting a glance.

It wasn't right, she couldn't make me feel all these feelings only to discontinue doing what she was to win me over and now I'm on the edge of falling she's backing off?

Her downcast eyes and all the classiness are telling me this unsaid story she has hidden very well. I don't know why I observed, it's just like nothing indeed matters when she's the deception of me, she made me forget myself or what I was except this is the longing to be youthful to snatch what I want. To make everything mine if it's not.

She's so beautiful, how is this possible?

I want to become a wild lover in her love, I want to become the old me who snatches what she likes, fulfilling her craving. Her love appears chaste, her love is not colourful, it's white as celibacy.

"You don't have to keep an eye on me I-"

I couldn't stop myself when I noticed nail marks on both of her cheeks I found myself cupping her cheeks, I grazed my thumbs on her cheeks feeling my heart aching to hide her away from the world to safeguard her. Who could've done that to my angel?

"Who-?" I skim into her eyes explicitly witnessing the tears in her eyes. "Who did this? Are yo-" I huff relinquishing myself when she embraces me resting her head on my shoulder and holding me solidly.

"It's breaking..." she wept.

I damp my lips not understanding her behaviour though she needed me and my heart needed her so I let her cry on my shoulder. I was the same height as hers thanks to my heels which made it more leisurely for her to hug me as she held me securely. I was aghast to even move, I gulp cladding my hands back on her shoulders caressing her back, and consoling her. My heart was battering in my ear, and soon enough our hearts beat in scan placating each other.

I couldn't enunciate anything I wanted to yet I didn't because if I conveyed something then she would leave and I don't want her to leave, I want her to need me, I want her to keep needing me. I only notice her eyes spewing fuming tears on my neck, her angelic fragrance spinning my head like before though it was too substantial for me to be intoxicated by it. My breathing ceases in my lungs, I exclusively don't want her to pull away, I like the way her pain contradicts mine and I certainly don't know or comprehend.

What is this connection between us?

"Roseanne..." I held her back securely like I wanted to guard her.

It was like what I've wanted, this devotion, this insanity, delirium, and whenever our eyes encounter I don't know what they're looking into each other. Maybe they recognize something we can't demonstrate. I wanted to keep her in my arms I don't know why, I just can't see her like this, I'm not used to seeing her like this, I wanted her back, the one who aggravated me, razzed me, attempted to win me over, permanently ready for challenges is now mourning from god knows what.

"My heart-... please make it stop, please... I don't want to feel this I-"

She stifled on her tears gagging on her tears eventually looking at me and my heart was paining to witness the ocean of tears in her eyes.