Seasons (Ari AU)

Chapter 55

  The hospital room has yet to be quiet since I walked in three hours ago. Nurses coming and going every ten minutes at the most, but more often than not every five. The monitors are up louder than ever. This time it's not just the baby's heartbeat they're watching, but contractions and blood pressure as well.

  Apparently after I left, Holland's fever kept climbing higher and she began vomiting. They switched over to another antibiotic for her infection but it was making her ill as well. "There's only so many options we have while she's pregnant," the doctor told me after I demanded someone come and tell me more than "We're watching her."

  In the last three hours I've heard the words "STAT C-section" mumbled under hushed breaths at least five times. Shauna was finally the one to give me the complete rundown of the muttering that the nurses continuously attempted.

  "The infection is making her have contractions.  The meds are making her sick which is leading to dehydration rather quickly. They've given her something to make sure she can rest, and to try and help with the nausea. But, if these next couple bags of fluids don't help slow down the contractions, we're looking at possibly taking the baby."

  My entire body went numb as the fear in my heart began to rise. "It's too soon."

  My sister nods, and I know I haven't said anything she doesn't already know. "They're doing everything they can right now, Ari. I promise."

  After the first bag of fluids is in, an ultrasound tech comes in taking a look at a few specific things that no one is actually saying out loud. Joy and the tech just point to the screen and whisper with each other as the wand is gliding around Holland's stomach. 

  "What?" The word slips right out of my mouth as I stop pacing on the other side of the room.

  They share a look with one another before Joy steps back from Holland's bedside. "The baby-"

  "Evy," I interrupt her. "I know that you guys prefer to just use the term baby or he and she, but this baby, you know this baby, you know her mother. Please call her by her name, Joy."

  "Okay," she says, giving me a sympathetic smile. "Evy is having some d-cells."

  My eyes search hers, wondering what exactly she's meaning. "That means what?"

  "Her heart rate is dropping every  now and then." Which is exactly what my stomach does when I begin to understand what she's talking about. "I'm going to go give these new numbers to the doctor and see what he says. But, in most situations like this, we watch through another bag of fluids and reassess then."

  Without realizing it, I'm bent over, my hands gripping my knee caps as I try to keep my breathing steady while my hair falls in my face. 

  "Most of the time the fluids work. Holland's body is just under a lot of stress right now with the infection and the medicine making her sick. I promise you, we are going to take care of both of them."

  I nod my head, still staying in my crouched position, taking it all in. 

  I hear two sets of footsteps walk towards the door. Once I hear the heavy wood close, I'm completely on my knees in the middle of the hospital room. Hitting the linoleum in such a way, should've been painful, but nothing can touch the ache in my chest as I worry about Holland and the baby.

  My eyes are squeezed tightly as I whisper prayers that haven't left my lips in even my scariest of burning buildings. Begging, pleading for both of their well being. Hopes of a future that includes both of them healthy, thriving as we build a life together. 

  When I feel a hand on my shoulder I finally open my tear filled eyes, seeing my sister crouched down next to me. "You need to breathe."

  I shake my head, pursing my lips together. "I'll hold my breath until I know it's not time for Evy to take her first."

  Shauna is sound asleep on the small space at the window seat while I haven't left Holland's bedside, my butt probably creating a permanent indention in the chair.  My hand goes from cradling Holland's swell, to rubbing soothing circles over her daughter's home. 

  She's been too still lately. The nurses continue to assure me that her rate has picked up after the second bag of fluids and that she's probably sleeping like I should be doing as well. I ignore them, knowing that this little girl doesn't sleep at night, especially not at midnight.

  I've been here multiple nights, woken up by Holland's shifting in the bed out of discomfort, quietly begging for Evy to calm down, all while trying to keep from waking me up. 

  It never worked though. I'd shuffle my tired body over to the chair, plop down in it and playfully threaten the baby with taking away any type of sweet, sugary treat after lunch time if she didn't calm down and let her Ma get the rest she needed.  

  Hearing my calming voice, and the promise of cutting out any type of dessert, would calm her down within five minutes. 

  This time, I need her wiggling. I need her kicking the hell out of her mother. I need her using Holland's bladder as a punching bag. 

  "Hello my beautiful girl. It's your Uncle Ari again. You know this is usually the time of day where I have to tell you to chill out your somersaults, and let your mother catch some Z's." I swallow down the lump that's grown in my throat. "Just this once though, I need you to ignore all my previous pleas. Can you do that for me?" 

I place a chaste kiss over Holland's gown, quickly deciding I need more contact. I need both of my girls to know how much I love them. Carefully I slip part of Holland's gown up, revealing her skin and the monitors resting over her growing bump. 

  With my lips hovering just over her skin I pour out a little more of my heart.  "My sweet Evy," my voice breaks as I say her name. "I think I love you almost as much as I love your mom.  She has such an incredible grace about her. She's the most kind and giving woman you'll ever meet. If you grow up to be even half of that, the world will be a better place."

 I let my lips rest against the warmth of her skin for a moment. "I need a little help from you here, beautiful. You see, I want my last name on your birth certificate."  There's the faintest nudge, just under the spot where I'm talking to. "I know I'm not your real dad." My head drops a little, resting my forehead on Holland's stomach now. "I'm not anyone's real father. But I want you, and I want your Ma. I want to marry her, Evy. Do you think she'll agree to that?"  

  I can't hold back my grin as I watch Holland's entire belly roll as it appears Evy looks to be jumping for joy. I chuckle softly, kissing the swell one more time before placing Holland's gown back in place.  

  "Is that your way of asking, Levy?"

*Unedited