[Complete] Noise and Kisses {chicklit}

33

"So, how is he?" I ask, picking at the skin around my fingernails.

"Yeah, he's good... he asked after you." Leila replies, placing our drinks down at the table.

"Aww, that's nice. Tell him I say 'hi' next time you speak to him."

"I will. He... erm, asked if you've spoken to Ben recently..." she says, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"No... I haven't." I say, pragmatically and take a sip of my drink.

"He thinks that you should hear him out."

"Of course, he does, he's Ben's best mate..." I say, rolling my eyes and pulling a cigarette out the box.

"Pete said that Ben is struggling... Maybe you should just hear him out?" Leila questions, taking a sip of her drink and clinking it back on the table.

"I don't need to hear more lies, or more excuses from him, mate. We've been through this before." I say, exhaling the smoke from my lungs.

"I know, but Pete said -"

"Leila, I love you," I interrupt, "but this is just classic Ben. He says and does whatever he wants to get what he wants. I saw the texts for myself – he's been seeing Becca and giving me shit for hanging out with Shaun."

"... if you're sure..." she says, looking like she knows more than she's letting on.

"I am! Now, did a Pete ask you to go and visit?"

"Yes!" She says, excitedly. "I'm going once we're both settled into classes."

"I can't believe we start uni next week... I miss Carly already." I say, stubbing my cigarette and taking another sip.

"Me too... her pics on Insta are amazing though... I'd love to visit Bali."

"Same here! She's so lucky."

"Hmm... so, have you given anymore thought to Freshers Week? You've got to go out at least once - meet people, settle in!"

I shake my head vehemently. "Nope, not feeling it. I'm sure I'll make friends in the classes and if I don't, fuck it, I'll be alright. Plus, I'm going to the open day on Monday, so all the freshers will be there..." I say, but I'm not convincing myself, let alone Leila.

She nods. "Anyway, drink up, the movie is starting in 15mins..." she says, taking another sip of her drink.

I finish my wine quickly and we cross over to the cinema to watch a cheesy romance flick.

***

On Monday, I wake early and get myself ready to attend my first day at university. It's the open day, where all new starters join together, find out more about their classes and meet new faces. The anxiety is wearing heavily on me today, but I try to push it to the back of my thoughts with some much-needed Harry Styles.

I decide to keep my hair down and settle on my stonewash boyfriend jeans, a simple white t-shirt and blazer. I pull on my vans for extra comfort and keep eye make-up laid back, with winged eyeliner and neutral lip. I stare at my reflection for a few moments and sigh heavily... it would have to do. Grabbing my satchel, I head out the door and get to the bus stop with time to spare. Unsurprisingly the bus is late, but I still manage to make it to campus a little early. I should really think about starting driving lessons.

I stand at the entrance to smoke a cigarette and watch as people walk into the grounds. Many of them nod at me and smile, and it's nice to see so many new, friendly faces. As I reach into my bag to check the day's schedule, I hear someone clearing their throat.

I look up and the shock is palpable when I see Ben standing before me. He looks unbelievably good in his usual black t-shirt and black jeans combo. But he's wearing trainers today, which is odd.

"Fancy seeing you here..." he says, trying to lighten the moment.

"...I.. what... are -" I can't manage the words.

"I decided to go to Middlesex, stay close to mum. I was going to tell you, but then... you know."

I nod, words still unable to escape me.

"How you been?" He asks, pulling a cigarette to his lips and lighting it. I swallow audibly.

"Good... how are you?" I ask, not quite able to meet his eye-line.

"I'm good... I've missed you."

"Ben..."

"Holly, please... I know you owe me nothing, but I would really appreciate if you could hear me out. If for nothing else, but to give you the whole story. Not now, obviously, but soon... whenever works for you."

I nod.

"Cool... so, miss organised, what's the schedule for today?" He asks, jokingly pulling at the paper in my hand. I blush a little and bat him away.

"Of course, you have no idea..." I say, rolling my eyes.

"What can I say, I like to live life on the edge!" He jokes and I can't help but laugh.

"Come on, we don't want to be late and fuck your whole day up." He says, dropping his cigarette to the floor.

We walk alongside each other as I read through the day's plans. "And then at 11:30 there's a talk about freshers week -"

"Finally, some fun in all this shit!" Ben says, smirking at me.

"Actually, I'm skipping freshers week..." I say, placing the paper back into my bag.

"You're kidding me? Why, Holly? That's the best part!" He says, surprised at my confession.

"... It's not for me..."

Ben scoffs. "Of course, it is! Getting drunk and being stupid is right up your street. Look, I'm not even drinking and I'm going. I can pick you up and drop you back home again... come on! Don't be lame." He pleads and I feign mock offence, slapping him on the arm.

"Hey! I'm not lame! I'm just trying to steer clear of drama." I say and immediately feel bad for my choice of words.

"Ouch, tiger..." slamming his fist against his heart, "I promise, no drama."

"No, honestly, it's cool. You go... have fun!" I say and he rolls his eyes at me.

"So, when can we talk?" He asks a little while later, as we leave a session on completing coursework effectively.

"I don't mind... when are you thinking?"

"Why don't we grab some food together after this?" He asks, gesturing around us.

I'm nodding before I even realise what I'm doing.

"Cool... now, where to next?"

"Depends on your course..."

"Business Management."

I raise my eyebrows and he laughs a little.

"Fuck off" he says jokingly, and I can't help but giggle.

I pull out and scan the sheet... "there's a business talk in 10 minutes at the Williams Building."

"Cool, then that's where I'll be. What about you, what are you doing?" He asks, adjusting his bag on his shoulder.

"I've got a media and arts chat in Grove..." I say, glancing at the small map on the other side of the page. It looks so far away!

"Ok, cool. Let's meet outside the town hall after, yeah?"

I nod and he squeezes my shoulder gently before walking off. Overwhelmed and a little empty from his departure, I make my way across campus.