[Complete] Noise and Kisses {chicklit}

25

***

As predicted, Ben isn't at college all week and I'm grateful for it. After sharing full details with the girls over lunch on Thursday, they're all so kind, offering me advice and making me feel better.

"Listen, I know you're gonna whinge about this, but we need to go out and just have some fun!" says Carly, shaking my arm lightly.

"Mate, I definitely don't need any more "fun"... I've had enough "fun" to last a fucking eternity," I joke and she giggles.

"I'm serious... our nights out are always complicated by him and his mates, so let's go somewhere they won't go." she says, making a fair point.

"Oooh, what about the Railway Tavern? It was alright down there..." asks Leila, leaning in excitedly. The girls look at me expectantly and I can help but consent.

"Fine! But don't tell Mark, or James... or any of them!" I say, warningly.

Carly shakes her head in silent agreement. "Couldn't if I wanted to..." says Leila.

***

The following evening, I decide to put my best foot forward and enjoy my night out. After agonising about everything that happened between Ben and I, I feel self-assured that I know I've tried. I've accepted him back, despite his flaws and he continues to fuck it all up. He's not a guy you can have a relationship with... and as difficult as my heart is finding to come to terms with it, my head feels resolute.

Desperate to have a good time, I decide to dress up and settle on a velvet v-neck dress with bell sleeves, black tights and shoe boots. I take time to work my hair into beach waves and settle on gold eye make-up with lashings of mascara and a red lip. I add a denim jacket and brown leather crossover bag to finish. Looking in the mirror, I barely recognise the person in front of me – exactly the look I was going for.

I agree to meet the girls at the bus stop, but make sure to have a couple of glasses of Sandra's finest pinot noir before I walk out the door.

"Fucking hell, Holly!" exclaims Carly, as I cross over the road to meet them.

"Mate, you are looking fit as tonight!" Kelly chimes in and I can't help but blush.

"Thanks ladies, I needed to feel as far removed from myself as possible."

"Well, it suits you..." says Sarah, and I can't help but feel like it's a backhanded compliment.

When we arrive at the Railway Tavern, Leila and I make a beeline for the pool table again, as the other girls head to the bar. As I prepare to break, a voice asks "Holly?" I turn and recognise Shaun; the heavily tattooed man we'd met last time we'd visited. Leila's eyes grow wide and I smile.

"Hey, aren't you that guy that asked for my number... but never text me?" I say, jokingly.

He raises his hand over his heart. "I'm so sorry, I smashed that phone at work a few days after we met and had no way to talk to you."

I roll my eyes. "Of course, you did!"

"I did, I swear!" he exclaims, and I giggle.

"It's fine... Shaun, right?"

He smiles and nods. "Can I buy you a drink, to apologise?"

"Sure, why not... rum and diet coke," I say, and he walks off.

"Fucking hell mate!" Leila says, sauntering around the table, "you played that like a boss!"

I laugh. "Just trying to have some "fun"!" I say, jokingly and she elbows me lightly in the ribs.

Shaun returns a few minutes later with my drink and his friend, Mitch in tow.

"Doubles?" he suggests, and I nod to Leila.

"Sure, us against you."

He smiles cheekily "Are you sure?"

"Oh yeah... loser buys the next round." I say and he laughs.

"Deal."

Leila breaks and immediately sinks a red. Shaun groans, so I stick my tongue out at him. She sets up another red and I smile at her as I take the pool cue. The rest of the girls come over to watch, surprised by our new, not new, friends.

"You girls are players!" Mitch jokes, as he takes his shot.

"Oh, you have no idea..." I reply, and Shaun raises his eyebrows in surprise.

We continue on and I manage to sink a few reds myself. A little while later, the boys are down to the black and Leila and I just have one red on the table. I'm feeling a little more than tipsy as I bring the pool cue down to the table. Knowing we're likely going to lose, I take a deep breath and just hit the ball. It smacks the red, flying it round the table before dropping into the furthest left pocket. The girls shriek and Leila pulls out her phone.

"I'm recording this shit!" she shouts, and I laugh.

I line up the cue and just go for it. The white ball smacks into the black and it beautifully sinks into the middle pocket. I jump up and down and Shaun pulls me in for a hug, which I return.

"Right, I guess I owe you both a drink... same again?" I nod and he and Mitch walk to the bar.

Carly comes over and asks, "Who are those guys?"

I shrug, "Leila and I met them here once before, it's no big deal."

Leila chimes in, "Holly gave him her number but he lost it."

I roll my eyes. "That obviously didn't happen mate, he's just being polite."

"Who cares?!" Carly says, "He's fucking gorgeous!"

I laugh and look over at Shaun at the bar. He's looking over and grinning lightly and I feel my heart sink again. No, not tonight. Ben's not ruling my heart in this one.

After Shaun and Mitch brings over our drinks, I thank them and then excuse myself for a cigarette. Standing outside the pub, I light up and then fumble around in my bag for my phone. As the screen comes to life, I see a ton of Instagram messages. Confused, I click on the notifications.

WTF, Holly?

Who's the guy?

Where the fuck are you?

Answer me.

You can't just go out and fuck some other guy, I thought u were better than that

Clearly ur just easy

I knew Leila had recorded the final shot, but I didn't know she'd uploaded it to Instagram. As I replay the video, I notice that it includes Shaun and I hugging. Drunk and offended by his words, I quickly unblock his number and call him.

"Holly?"

"Who the fuck do you think you are, calling me 'easy'?"

"Who's the guy, Holly?"

"We're still doing this?! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! Why can't you just leave me alone?" I shout into the receiver.

"You KNOW why – you know how I feel about you! And then you flaunt some other guy to me on Instagram!" he shouts back.

I'm so angry, I could scream. "I forgot you were even on my Insta! I didn't even post it, Leila did! I can do whatever I want, and it's got fuck all to do with you!"

"I didn't take you for a slut, Holly" he says, coldly.

I ball my hand into a fist, trying to absorb some of the anger I feel towards him. He is not going to ruin my evening.

"...well, I learned from the best." I say, coolly and put the phone down.

He immediately calls back and I divert him to voicemail before blocking him again. Immediately the messages start coming through Instagram.

I'm sorry

I didn't mean it

Sighing, I type out a final message and click send.

Move on... I am.

I block him on Instagram and walk back inside the pub.