Fight to the finish..

25

These past few days at Ella's really haven't been how I expected. I've had too much time to think. Me and Ella have had a big heart to heart and I've ignored Leah for 3 days. But I have decided it's time to go back to the mad house and sort things out.

I thank Ella and say goodbye to Lessi and Millie Turner who were round trying their best to cheer me up. I appreciate them so much, why didn't I sign for United?

The motorway is strangely clear, almost empty and for a Friday afternoon that's not usually the case. But I won't complain it'll get me home quicker.

I get half an hour away from home when suddenly the traffic is back to back. I check my sat nav to see how long the hold up is and then check my phone to see what's happened. No reports. No estimated time. I sat in the traffic for half an hour when we approached the accident that had occurred on the opposite side of the central reservation. I counted three cars that had crashed but I was going at 40mph so I couldn't really focus on counting.

Finally after an hour I managed to pull into the driveway, none of the girls' cars are here which is strange they should be back from training by now.

Dragging all my stuff back inside and upstairs I finally sat down on my bed and was able to relax. But when can someone ever just relax?

My phone started ringing, if I'm honest I saw it was Leah and couldn't be bothered to have our conversation right now. So I ignored it, pressed the big red button. 5 minutes later my phone went off again this time it's Beth. I decided to answer it.

Bella: Hello
Beth: I can't say too much because I don't know. Get to the hospital now, it's Leah. She's hurt.
Bella: What? Beth explain

But she just ended it, what has happened? I feel instantly guilty. Leah's number just rang me, maybe it was her telling me she wanted me to come and see her? What if it's really bad and she just wanted to talk to me before the end?

Sprinting to my car like my life depended on it, I managed to make it to the hospital within 10 minutes. I made it to the reception desk.

Bella: Hello excuse me I need to find a patient. She's had an accident I was told she'd be here
Nurse: What's the name love?
Bella: Leah, Leah Williamson
Nurse: Oh
Bella: What?
Nurse: You aren't able to see her right now, but if you take that first door on the right there are some others here for the same patient and the doctor should be out shortly.
Bella: Thank you. So much.

Walking through the door, I saw Beth, Viv and Amanda Leah's mum. I fell to my knees instantly. Seeing how distraught everyone else has told me that it is serious. This can't happen to me. Not when I have finally realised.

*flashback to with Ella*
B: Els sit down I need to speak to you
E: We do need to speak actually but let me go first
B: Okay
E: I have known you since before I could walk and I need to be the one to speak some sense into you because clearly you don't like the truth. But tough like workid because I like giving the truth out. You need to stop being in denial. You need to realise what you want because I guarantee it's right in front of you, you're just too stubborn to accept it. I know you've never been one to accept good things that are thrown at you. And I know you've been hurt by a certain arsehole that we don't talk about. But is Leah her? Really? Because I don't remember her being blonde to be honest Bels. I love you like a sister and I really think in my heart, Leah loves you and I know you love her too.
B: That's just it Els, I told her I love her the other night and what does she do? Go and meet Jordan. How am I supposed to deal with that? I don't want to get hurt.
E: Life's not short Bella. You won't get the reward without the risk. You don't know how long you have and you can't waste any of it. So go home tomorrow and tell that girl you want her.
B: Kicking me out eyy
E: No never but you need to do it now or you'll bottle it.
B: I know. I understand. I will tell her everything tomorrow. About my past, about my mentally instability and that I'll be there as long as she wants me to be.

*flashback over*

Amanda is crying, so are Beth and Viv and I really don't know what to do. I can't control my emotions that are over taking my body are driving my insane. I just want to see her face. Please.

As if the doctor read my mind, he takes that as his cue to enter.

Doctor: Are you the family and friends of Leah Williamson?

We all nodded in his direction. I don't think any of us could stop choking on our tears for a second to speak.

Doctor: Would you like to follow me to Leah's room? Just to warn you before we enter Leah is in an induced coma right now, just whilst we finish our tests but she is not in pain and can still hear you. Okay?

Once again, we all nodded and slowly began walking behind him. The window allowed me to see Leah's state before I had to enter. Tubes everywhere. Breathing tube, cannulas attached to machine and IV drips. Oh my Leah, what have you done to yourself.

Entering the room, hurt my heart intensely. It felt like my heart had been ripped out and was being trampled all over. I approached her in the bed and kissed her forehead. I could only manage three words.

"I'm so sorry"