Striptease // Ateez // OT8 x femreader // *m*

50 - to my eight loves

When Seonghwa woke up the next morning, Maya was already up, but her pillow still smelled like her. He pushed his nose into it and took a deep breath. He heard someone in the shower, probably Jongho from the sound of it, he was humming. It was delightfully normal. Everything would turn out okay. They would find a way. They had to find a way. Right?

Wrong.

«To my eight loves,

I couldn't tell you exactly what day it was that I fell in love with each and every one of you, but I did. Seonghwa, I fell for you first. You know that, right? You were the first man I ever fell in love with. You were my first of many things. Those are beautiful memories I'll hold on to if I can bear them.

I felt sad and defeated when I had to start to striptease to survive. You guys lifted me back up again. You made sure I got on the right track and supported me every step of the way. Thank you. I promise I'll honor that by finishing my degree.

I'm sorry for leaving like this, but it is the right thing to do. You might not realize it right now, but you will. I couldn't live with myself if I was the reason Ateez failed. It would ruin what we have together, in addition to ruining your careers. This is the only possible outcome of this situation.

Do I regret ending up here, having to make this decision? No. A million times no. I will never regret having met you, having loved you. I will love you forever, I truly will, but we're not going to spend that forever together. It wasn't meant to be. I guess I should have known. It was too perfect. You guys are just too good to be true.

I know you loved me, each in your own way. You were all very good at telling me. Even tonight, the most painful night of my life, I felt your love surrounding me. Please, don't have any regrets. Don't think about «should have, would have, could have»... That won't do us any good. This ending to our story is painful, but it's the right one.

I love you.

I will always love you, all eight of you. Still, this is the end for us. Don't look for me. I won't be around. I won't look for you. I will never go to a concert, I will not even follow you online. I have to distance myself. You'll never see me again. I will never see you again. I want to scream as I write this, the pain is unbearable.

Please, be safe and happy. Work hard. Forget what you can. Happiness will find you, probably when you least expect it. Your futures will have love in them, I know it.

MeyMey»

Jongho was the strong one, he always was. He read the letter that was left on their dining table out loud. Seonghwa got up and left as soon as the last word was read. The others followed, worried. But he wasn't running out the door like a crazy person. Instead, they found him in Maya's room, sobbing into the covers of her bed. They could see that she had packed a few things, but most of her belongings were left behind.

«She didn't bring any of the things we gave her,» Yunho said, picking up a sweatshirt of his he had given her. It hurt. That's when Hongjoong saw the ring on her nightstand.

Eight grown men in a girl's bedroom, crying.

--

a/n 

I'm sorry! Please forgive me.