Risen- Drarry COMPLETE

Chapter 51

—Harry POV—

My least favorite thing about Dr. Gilroy's office is her white plastic analog clock, because it ticks very loudly and it hangs right above her head. Whenever she asks something I don't know how to answer, the ticking gets infinitely louder, and the sound pierces my brain to a certain point where I can become a bit irritated, and then I can't hear what's going on around me for a second.

We had showed up because in all fairness, it had been a while since I'd gone, and Draco said he'd wanted to make sure I knew that I could trust Dr. Gilroy if nobody else. Draco wanted me to try speaking with her about what I'd said at Ron and Hermione's house.

Even then, I didn't really know what to talk to Dr. Gilroy about. Everything is just really complicated and it's all a bit of a mess. Besides, this isn't exactly the kind of information I should be sharing with a Muggle, is it?

"He'd said something, doctor, and well, it was a bit concerning to me and to his friends. I spoke to him about it after but I could only go so far, and so I thought it would be best if we shared with you."

That's what Draco had told Dr. Gilroy when she asked what we'd been up to lately. As usual, she pushed up her glasses, crossed her legs, and leaned forward, ready to write down what either of us said.

"Well, while I appreciate the initiative, Draco, let's see if Harry can tell us what it is you're speaking of that made you so concerned. It's good for him to tell us himself. That way he might feel a bit less forced."

"Of course."

I glanced up at Draco, then at Dr. Gilroy, before fixing my gaze to the puzzle cube sitting on the desk beside her, fiddling with the ends of my sleeves.

"I... I said that... I didn't matter that much, and so because of that I could sacrifice myself to... a situation... i-if I needed to." the words almost choked themselves out of me in shame. You could hear Dr. Gilroy's pen scratching at her parchment.

"Well, I can't say I'm particularly surprised, considering your childhood, Harry. I do have a few theories about this, actually." I squirmed in my spot as she spoke.

"Well let's start with the more straightforward question: Harry, why is it that you believe you do not matter, or perhaps aren't important to others in your life?"

That was the question that made her analog clock tick exceptionally loud today. It hurt, and it had made me come out of the conversation with Dr. Gilroy. At the moment all I could think of was how loud the-

"I'm so sorry, it's our friend calling. I'll be just outside the office." Draco cast me a quick glance before standing and walking towards the door, answering the phone as he did so. I blinked, slightly startled.

"Sometimes, Harry, people can love us and care about us a great deal, and maybe not show it much, or show it in a different way, perhaps a way we don't understand. These are called love languages, and I believe it's possible there may be a disconnect between what you may be looking for and what you're receiving."

I stared at her for what felt like a long while, not quite processing what she'd said.

"I can have both you and Draco take the exam to discover your main love language, but we can wait for him to come back before we do that. If I were to guess, Harry, based on your past traumas and repeated occurrences throughout your childhood and adolescence, and on behaviors I've seen you display here in the office with me, I would say your main love language is physical touch."

I once again only stared, feeling as though she was almost speaking to somebody that wasn't me.

"They way you inch closer to Draco and hold his hand, especially when something makes you uncomfortable, can help me deduce this. Now of course," she raised her hands up in mock surrender, "I may very well be wrong," she put her hands down, "but it's seems that's how you communicate your affection towards him. And it doesn't have to be romantic. Maybe you kiss your godson on the forehead or give him a hug, hold his hand; anything, really. I also think you use this separately as a way to ground yourself. You are a very touchy person in general, and it shows in the way you display love and affection.