Full Out

Chapter Forty-Four

Three days.

It has been three days since I have talken to... well... everyone. I avoided going to the cafeteria because Roman and Cora were there. I mostly wanted to keep my distance from Cora until I was sure she had found another table to eat at. Instead, I had placed myself in the very back corner of the library. The librarian lady had given me a few odd looks, but never said anything. Maybe she had heard what had happened in the cafeteria and felt pity.

Roman on the other hand, well that was complicated. We haven't spoken a word to each other since he left my house on Monday. There was no call, text, or face-to-face action. I never even saw him in the hallways. He must have been avoiding my routes on purpose. I didn't blame him fully. I would have been weird around him too if I blurted out my feelings for him... which I didn't have.

Okay, maybe that wasn't true? Maybe it was? I was still in the process of clarifying what had really happened that day. Roman confessed feelings. I caught up to that and accepted the fact that my best friend was in love with me. The problem I was having was with my own feelings. Did I like him in the same way? Did I not? I wasn't sure. I had been friends with Roman for so long that it felt odd to think of him in any other way. It was stressful, but it gave me something to think about so I wouldn't continue crying over Ezra.

I hadn't spoken to him either. He had tried calling and texting, even talking to me in the halls. Eventually, yesterday to be exact, he had given up. I hadn't heard a thing from him since. A part of me wanted to talk to him. I convinced myself that it was for closure, but I knew deep down that it was because I just wanted to hear his voice again. Even though he had done me wrong, I still had feelings for him. That was another problem going on inside of me.

What was I going to do with my feelings for Ezra? I had never had to overcome a breakup before.

At least I was back to eating. My mother had gotten worried when I skipped almost every meal since my chip overload on Monday. Now that it was Thursday, I was kind of hungry.

I was now sitting in the back of the library, unpacking my lunch. I brought a sandwich and a can of rootbeer, which I snuck from my dad. He loved it just as much as I did. My mother would be pissed if she found out I took it.

I also brought a granola bar, which I started on. Plugging in my earphones, I played an episode of a crime show on Netflix as I munched down on my lunch.

When I started on my sandwich, a motion caught my eye. I glanced up, not bothering to take my earphones out. Maybe it was a student searching for a book.

I did a double take, finding a familiar face standing above me. I groaned, not wanting to be bothered with nonsense at the moment. Now was my moment of peace. I didn't want it disturbed by-

"Can I sit here?" McKenna Caster asked, pointing to the empty couch cushion next to me. I mentally cursed myself for not putting my bag there.

How did she even know I was here?

Oh right, because she's...

I shrugged with a small nod. She grinned and took the seat at my right. Her golden hair was up in a ponytail today. She wore leggings, converse shoes, and a Presley High School t-shirt. It was very different from her regular attire. She wore nude makeup on her eyelids, but no foundation covered her cheeks.

With everything that had happened within the past few weeks, I found that I disliked McKenna even more than I had before. She had messed up my life back in Freshman year. She was coming back tenfold this year. Why? Who the hell knew.

The only reason I invited her to sit down was because I wanted a chance to yell at her like I had everyone else. My temper and emotional feelings had dissipated over the last few days, but I still had enough juice for one more argument...