Wicked Desire

8: cleaning up

A week later
Clodagh

Birds are chirping outside, it's morning already. I wake up and roll over on the bed, forgetting that I have been handcuffed to the bedpost by my right wrist. I pull the hair out of my face while I lie on my stomach and let out an annoyed grunt. "Stupid fucking thing," I say as I tug furiously.

I've been locked in here for a week now. He comes and goes to give me food, let me go to the toilet etc. But I haven't left the room otherwise. Anytime he isn't in the room with me I am handcuffed to the bed. Just endlessly lying down for hours and hours every day.

I lie on my stomach for a while staring out the window. There's a beautiful red cardinal bird outside the window flying in and out of view. I've never seen one before, on TV or on Instagram but never in real life. They are so beautiful. What would it be like to be a bird... I could fly anywhere I wanted. Anywhere away from here.

The lock of the door rattles and I jump up against the bedpost, my knees tucked tightly to my chest. "I have something for you, for your injuries" he was carrying a small bag, as he opened it I realized it was medical equipment. "I'm fine, don't bother," I said while giving him a despising look. "Of course you aren't fine, let's get you cleaned up."

"No way am I moving, I'm injured because of YOU, and I will not just lie down for you." In an instant he was standing over me, his jaw clenched and a vein prominent on his forehead. He took my jaw in his large hand, forcing my head back to look up at him, the pressure he was applying was getting painful. "Don't you DARE speak to me like that. EVER." He bellowed just inches from my face. My lip beginning to tremble remembering how much pain he can cause when angry. "Get your ass up right now." He said through gritted teeth. He released his grip, quickly wiping my eyes as he turned to get the keys for the handcuffs.

He unlocked them and I rubbed my now bruised wrist. "The main bathroom is this way" I had a small en-suite in my room which he allowed me to use for the toilet about 3/4 times a day, but I've never seen the rest of the house. I was unconscious before I could make it to the doorstep.

I regret being so argumentative and rude. All week I have acted like this because I'm confused and angry as to why I'm here. He gives me no answer so I'm left to my own devices. Truth is, I want to beg him to let me come outside, I want to grovel and be nice to him so I get more liberties. But I'm holding myself back still because I know once I do that I will form an attachment like I always read about with these situations.

He held his arm outstretched for me to come to the door. I got up slowly and made my way over to him. He walked me in front of him with his hand on my waist pushing me forward. The hallway was so bright as the sun came through a humongous window at the end, making the wooden walls glow. We turned a corner and came to the bathroom. It was a gorgeous room keeping with the same wood theme. The bath was amazing. It was perfectly fitted into the width of the room and surrounded by a floor-to-ceiling window.

The bath was already full, steam coming off of the surface. "Take your clothes off." I turned in shock as I looked at him in horror. "What? No way" I brought my arms up covering my torso out of nervousness. He stepped closer to me with his hands on his hips. "Look you need to clean up, you can get in the bath and I'll turn around until you are in or we can do it a much harder way I don't think you'll enjoy." He stood there waiting for my answer as I looked up at him shaking and barely breathing. I gave him a small nod as I looked down at my feet. "Good, leave your clothes on the chair"

I nervously pulled my shirt over my head and threw it on the chair. Then my shorts. I was left in my underwear, I had no bra on seeing as I was sleeping when he took me. I closed my eyes and swallowed a lump in my throat. I took my underwear off and put them in the middle of my shirt and shorts. Embarrassed that he would see them. I dipped my foot into the warm bath water and climbed in, wincing as the water touched the sensitive parts of my body that were healing. There were enough bubbles and depth to the bath that only my shoulders and head were showing but I still hugged my knees to my chest for a sense of protection.

He turned around and for a moment I turned to look at him and he gave me a small smile as he let out a deep sigh. I rested my chin between my knees to stop my lip from trembling. He came over and pulled the second chair up so he was sitting right beside me. He then got a bottle of shampoo and squirted some into his hands. I pulled away at first but he gave me a stern look and I swallowed another rising lump in my throat, letting him have his way.

He lathered the soap into my scalp. Gently rubbing and scratching my head. It felt nice I'll admit, my head slightly back and my eyes closed enjoying the warmth of the water. He used a jug to scoop the water up and rinse the shampoo off over and over again, squeezing my hair to get all the suds out. I was surprised he got the conditioner out, he caressed it into my hair so thoroughly and I felt his hand come to my neck. My eyes shot open but it wasn't a threatening motion, he lightly grazed the skin of my neck with his fingertips. Gently running his hand over my collarbone. I shook slightly indicating that he should stop there and to my surprise he did.

He rinsed the conditioner out and then took my wrist, lifting my arm out of the water. He took a sponge and ran it over my skin, then the other arm. He put his hand on my shoulder for me to lie back. He brought my ankle up and cleaned both of my legs up to just above my knee. As he Savoured every moment of it, making me tense up even more than I already was, and biting the skin of my cheeks.

Stifling the emotions I was feeling in the moment, the disgust at what he was doing, the power solely in his hands... I lay back with my arms wrapped around my chest trying not to cry. As he was at my feet I felt myself sink lower and lower into the water and I plunged myself under, feeling the calm and solace of the warm water. The whooshing of water water, my own heartbeat, the sound of blood rushing around my body... it was momentary relief distracting myself from what was happening

That brief sanctuary was ripped apart, a few seconds later two large hands came diving in as they came under my arms and lifting me upright with quite a splash. I gasped for air as I came back up and he removed his hands from me. "What are you doing!" He raised his voice disgruntled, as I smoothed my hair back. "Don't make me do that again." He said sharply as he continued his work.

He then handed me the sponge which I knew indicated for me to take over for other parts which I was extremely thankful for. He sat there while I cleaned myself up, not staring at me but running his eyes over me, stealing glances. "Let's not stay in here too long, it's not good for some of those cuts." With that, he got up and grabbed a towel holding it out wide for me to stand up. I eventually stood up, which was painful from the injury to my tailbone. I stepped out covering myself best as I could and he wrapped the towel around my shoulders and giving my arms a quick rub as his eyes lingered on my face a moment.

We made our way through the hall again end came to the kitchen and living area. The rooms walls were all windows, it was so bright and airy. The kitchen to the left of the room and the living area to the right. As you walk in there is huge bookcases on either side of the doorway with what looked like hundreds of books. A large TV sat beyond the sofas, everything looked brand new.

"It's just you here?" I finally plucked up the courage to say. "Yep, just me. Just us." I went slightly red at the word 'us'.
"sit down on the sofa, i need to apply some creams to those wounds." I sat down wrapping the towel around me tighter as he took a seat beside me with his bag. "W-what's that" I asked looking at the bag. "That's my medical equipment. I'm a doctor" I was shocked hearing he had such a profession. "An actual doctor? Like surgeries?" He chuckled, " yes, an actual doctor. I'm your doctor from now on, I'm here to take care of you."

Take care of me... what care has he taken so far? Does he want a patient or does he want a companion? "I'm sorry but I- uh...I don't know your name..." I hoped he wouldn't get angry at that but he stopped rifling through his bag and stopped to look at me giving me a small smile.

"Ben"