How You Love To Hate me

CHAPTER 13

When I start crying, I won't stop, it's like I can't stop. It feels good to finally let out everything I've been feeling for the past few months by crying. When I cry, I cry for a few things, 

one- Jae Hwa, I don't cry for her, but because of her. 

Ever since I said what I said, she's been messaging me on my social media accounts, saying harsh things about me but even worse my friends and family. So I've stopped looking at my messages in case every time I hear that 'ping' sound it's her. 

Two- my mum, ever since dad's been on his business trip, she's been struggling to pay for everything and she's been working two jobs just to get everything paid, yet she still keeps a smile on her face. 

Three- Jimin, those words he called me stuck with me and I don't think I'll ever forget it.

 Four- Jungkook, what I said to him was so dumb, I hate myself for it, and seeing him crying just shows how much I messed up. And lastly, a person who should play a huge part in my life, yet he does the opposite, my boyfriend... Min Yoongi. We've been dating for the past year now, however, we've not met up in the past few months, nor have we talked, texted, or communicated in any way. I've tried texting but he always uses the same excuse ' I'm busy ' and after that, I've just given up. When we walk past each other in the hallway, he doesn't even look at me, it's like we're not even together anymore.

Jungkook POV:

I've never seen Lisa cry. Ever. 

She always so loud and happy that when I see her crying I don't know what to do. 

She looks broken. She's not like every other girl who cries because their nail broke or because she's got a stain on her shirt, it must be something serious. The fact that she started crying after she apologized makes me feel like it was somewhat my fault. We've practically grown up together and she's never shed a tear, not even one, so for some reason, it made me think that Lisa was incapable of crying. I feel so dumb just sitting there doing nothing to comfort her when Mi Sun walks up to us from Jieuns table, grabs one of her hands as Lisa uses the other hand to cover her face. Mi Sun glares at me angrily before she drags Lisa out of the hall through the exit door. 

The once tense lunch hall instantly breaks into a conversation as they occasionally glance at me. The rest of lunch is slightly awkward as none of us know what to do or say. Lisa is pretty well known around the school so even if they were angry at what she said, everyone loves her. 

She's pretty social and she's always smiling so it's not a surprise that everyone's worried about her crying. (A/N: talk about two-faced) What she said to me affected me. Especially when someone like her said it. She was the main reason I started eating again after my eating disorder, so when she said it I didn't even know how to react. It was only afterward that I realized she said it on accident. She always says dumb things without thinking but she would never stoop that low. After that, I felt guilty about how everyone acted towards her so instead I avoided her. What made me more guilty was what I overheard Jimin say yesterday. I never heard him speak like that to anyone, especially to Lisa. I guess everyone was pretty angry at her. In class, everyone is quiet, fidgety even. 

Her head is hung low and I stare at her long black hair from behind, thinking what to do. Even Mr. Jung notices something is wrong and asks questions, she doesn't even acknowledge him, it's like she's in her own world. 

The past week our class has been weird. Very weird. Nobodys really speaking, unless answering or asking a question, which is already weird in itself, since nobody usually listening in the first place. Mr. Jung finally gets to teach his first real lesson in three years and the loudest person in the class ( besides Momo), Lisa has stopped speaking.