Definitely Not Sorry

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Haechans don't sulk. They just don't. It's a fact. Unless of course the Haechan is being petty and wants to make sure his point is being made. Then a Haechan will sulk.

So laying in his bed, staring at the bottom of the bunk bed above him and refraining from sighing every few seconds, that wasn't sulking. No it was... Alright so he hadn't come up with a word to describe it, but he was not sulky, being moody, or extremely upset.

He was contemplating some things. Yeah, that was it, he was just thinking.

And definitely not sulking.

Or sorry. Haechans are never sorry unless they have a very good reason to be and they know they were wrong. But the Haechan has to be very wrong to be sorry. And right now, well he knew he wasn't wrong. Therefore, he wasn't going to be sorry.

But that was a lot easier said than done. Especially once he started thinking. Like really thinking. He had to have been zoned out for at least an hour now just staring at the bed above him.

Sunglasses on, of course.

Haechan had two problems that had led to this. The first one was of course that he was tired. For some reason he just couldn't sleep last night, and he kept having really strange dreams. One of which involved plastic lawn ornament flamingoes raining down while SpongeBob sang some weird song, and then Mrs. Suh showed up and told him he really messed up this time.

That one was actually more of a nightmare than a dream, now that he was thinking about it. There he goes again, thinking.

His second problem was that he had nothing to do. At least, nothing fun to do. All his time had been spent planning how next to annoy Mark, and, well, without Mark around that meant there was nothing to do.

Did he... miss him? He would never admit it, but yeah. He was pretty sure that was the feeling in the pit of his stomach.

A hand waving in front of his face snapped him out of his thoughts, and he turned his head to see the hand belonged to YangYang.

"Oh, I thought you were sleeping."

Haechan sat up, slouching so his head wouldn't hit the top bunk. "What's up?"

"Jisung and I were going to go visit the grandparents and Suhs, but his Dad just took him out for the afternoon. So you wanna come with me?"

Haechan gasped, pressing a hand to his chest. "You were going to go without me!"

YangYang rolled his eyes, "If you keep being dramatic I will."

Deciding that's as much of a threat as Haechan needed, he jumped off the bed and threw on some shoes. He would've changed into something slightly nicer, but the people they were going to visit had seen him in much worse, so he didn't.

YangYang waited for him by the bottom of the stairs, and the two left together. Neither could drive, so they had to take a lot of connecting buses, and even after that they had to walk the last two kilometers.

They shared earbuds the entire time, which made it difficult walking the last stretch, but it kept them on their toes. They could've listened to their own music, but they liked knowing they were on the same page when they wanted to do a dramatic lip-synch. 

When they got to the driveway to the used-to-be church the grandparents and Suhs lived in, they didn't have to question if they were home or not. Grandpa was outside trying to rein in one of the goats who broke free from their fenced enclosure to attack Mr. Suh on his way to get the mail, and you could hear Grandma playfully criticizing Mrs. Suh for the way she plated the apple slices.

YangYang stuffed his earbuds into his pocket with a smile, casually walking over to help with the goat. Haechan gave Grandpa and Mr. Suh a wave as he headed inside instead, his sudden presence causing the two ladies to stop bickering.

"It's been awhile since I've seen the light of my life." Mrs. Suh gave Haechan a hug before Grandma could, but that didn't mean Grandma didn't hug him ever so slightly longer to make up for it.

"Did you come here on your own?"

"No, YangYang's outside helping Grandpa with a goat that escaped."

Both Grandma and Mrs. Suh frowned. It was one of the looks they shared identically, and if Grandma didn't have grey hair, they would've looked like twins.

"Out of all twenty-three of you, only two came to visit?" Grandma asked skeptically.

"They're all busy working at both cafes."

Grandma scoffed as Mrs. Suh's eyes lit up slightly.

"Do you have any pictures of the new one? Johnny's been mean and hasn't told me where it is so we can check it out ourselves."

Haechan happily pulled out his phone and showed them the few pictures he had taken for a reason he doesn't remember. Maybe for a before and after. Yeah, that was probably why.

YangYang, Grandpa, and Mr. Suh came in as they were being shown the basement, the knees of YangYang's pants now covered in dirt and grass stains.

"I swear that goat has it out for me. I saw murder in his eyes."

"You saw your scared silly self in his eyes. That goat's never hurt a flee."

"He just broke through a fence!"

"Weak board loosened from the wind storm."

The two continued to go back and forth until Mrs. Suh mentioned Haechan had pictures of the new cafe. So while Grandpa tried to figure out which way to swipe on the screen, Haechan followed YangYang into the kitchen for a glass of water.

The fridge was completely covered in pictures of the twenty-three kids. All of them from so many different years. It was like watching them all grow up in front of his eyes, and no matter how many times he's looked at it, there's always something new to see.

And today YangYang saw Haechan trying to kiss Mark's cheek in the back on a picture that was supposed to be of just Kun and Chenle. The cousins had been dressed up for something, and Mrs. Suh wanted a picture, but of course they were goofing around.

But in the back there was a mirror, and in the reflection you could see Mark trying to push away Haechan.

"Oh hey, look at that." YangYang pointed to the tiny detail in the picture.

Slipping his sunglasses down so he could see better, Haechan got closer to see what he was pointing at.

That feeling in the pit of his stomach panged, confirming his previous thoughts. He most certainly missed Mark.

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