small world

chapter 39

HARRY

I woke to the freedom of Sunday, and it would not be long until I would realize how beautiful Sundays were, our day off to do whatever we please whether we’re touring or home. And this Sunday, our first proper tour-Sunday now that it has started, would probably be my favorite Sunday morning forever, because I woke up in my own bed with the person I truly believed would be my first and last love in my arms. Charlie slept soundly with her face buried into my chest, and her hand balled into a small fist against my bare stomach. Her lips were almost smiling as her eyes fluttered in a distant dream, and her thin pale legs laced with mine like so delicately, like vines intertwined with branches. I traced a finger on my tribute tattoo on her rib cage, outlining the star over and over again, smiling when I remembered the moment in the car after Alan Carr deciding spur of the moment to get tattoos. There had never been truer words spoken than those inked to our skin, ‘music never fails to speak the unspoken’ because Charlie made all the love songs make sense, and all the lyrics come alive. I thought of her with every song I sang, and every one I heard. She was my inspiration and my everyday. And looking down at her, in that moment I knew that there was no way I could ever live without her – no way I could ever wake up one morning alone and have that day be nearly as wonderful as one with her face being the first thing my eyes land upon. And to my distress I knew there would be days that Charlie and I wouldn’t spend together, but in that moment I just knew I wasn’t ready to let her go, I wasn’t ready to let that become my reality just yet.  I extended my neck, lowering my lips to her and ever so gently, like kissing the top of a newborn’s head, I pressed my lips to her forehead before mumbling against her skin.

“Charlie?”

The sound of my voice stirred her in her dreams but didn’t fully wake her, instead her sleeping smile grew and I could feel her heartbeat quicken against my chest, like she could still sense me in her sleep, like she could hear my voice through her dreams, a corner of my mouth pulling up into a smirk of my own as I spoke again.

“Charlotte wake up,” I sung softly against her cheek before her eyes blinked away sleep and looked up at mine, before she could speak I heard my own words aloud.

“You have to come on tour with me.”

Her eyebrows knit together as she pushed up on the palms of her hand, sitting up and leaning against the headboard.

“Please? Come with me.”

“Harry… you know I can’t do that,” she said almost annoyed that I’d even brought it up, the gems in her eyes dulled. My heart sank in my chest, but when you’re in love, you never stop trying, so I wasn’t going to give up.

-CHARLIE’S POV-

“But why not?” his question was serious but there were notes of a child complaining for answers in the tone of his voice.

“Harry I have school and a job, I can’t just get up and leave everything to..” my voice trailed off but Harry didn’t hesitate to pick up where I left off, and for some reason it hurt much more coming from his lips rather than my own.

“To what?” he spat before the tone of his voice changed from offense to genuine hurt “To be with me? Is it not worth it, Charlie? Don’t you want to… don’t you want to be with me?” his voice broke and his gleaming eyes glossed over in tears as his head shook lightly with a mixture of disbelief and pain.

“How could you even ask me that? Of course I want to be with you, its just… it’s just not that easy.”

“What isn’t easy about it? Just for the European tour, its just a few weeks, it doesn’t have to be forever I just, I just don’t think I’m ready for goodbye.” And the saddest fear was that I wasn’t ready either.