small world

chapter 8

 CHARLIE

"Oh, that’s... exciting"

I searched for words to hide my already obvious disappointment. I could feel my emotions getting the best of me, tears forming in my eyes and before another word was spoken I escaped up the stairs and into my bedroom. 
I gently closed the door behind me and leant up against it for much needed support and quickly found myself sliding down it, as tears dripped down my face like raindrops on the window. This was supposed to just be the beginning of a week together, and it ended too soon. I don’t know if I could handle saying goodbye to Louis again, he was all I had left and just when we were given a second chance fate had ripped him from my grasp. Things would be so much harder this time around because I’d be saying goodbye to more than one friend; I had found new friends in Liam, Zayn, and especially Niall. It wasn’t fair. I sighed to myself. And then there was Harry. I couldn’t even put into words how I felt about him but I knew whatever it was made me want to stay by his side forever. Distraught, I crawled to my bed and snuggled under the covers, mentally preparing myself for the heartache in the morning.

LOUIS

"We’re leaving first thing in the morning" my eyes darted to Charlie’s and simultaneously tears formed in both our eyes. I could see her searching the room for words and my heart shattered like glass impacting with tile floors, broken into a million little pieces. I wasn’t ready to get up and leave her again.

"Oh, that’s... exciting" she stammered before disappearing up the stairs.

I observed the room and noticed Niall, Liam, and Zayn making uneasy glances at each other. And then there was Harry with his head in his hands with his elbows rested in his lap, rubbing his eyes to stop the tears which I had already seen fall from his eyes. And right now in this moment I believed what he had told me the night before. I instantly regretted my attempt to threaten him and scare him away from her. I wanted to protect her from him but I was being so selfish. The truth was Charlie was my best friend and she had never had a boyfriend, and I wasn’t ready to share her just yet. I was all she had; she was my best friend, and everything in between. But as soon as I saw them together that night I jumped to conclusions of classic curls-get-the-girls Harry, but I was wrong. I finally believed all his feelings and his genuine desire for her. He really wanted to fix her, and was just as, if not more so, shaken up over leaving her as I was. These past two days I thought he was crazy with poor intentions, but he knew how he felt. He hadn’t even defined the feeling but I knew exactly what it was, it was written all over his face: Harry was truly, genuinely, madly in love with her.

"Someone should go up there and check on her,” Niall said breaking the uncomfortable silence in the room.

Without word I made my way up the stairs two at a time at my best friend’s expense and knocked lightly on her door. Nothing. I pressed my ear up against it and heard muffled sniffles and decided to let myself in. I saw her huddled under the covers, just barely rocking back and forth in a calm sob. I climbed up into her bed and instinctively she crawled into my arms and rested her head against my chest without any questions asked. We laid their comfortably silent for some time as I ran my fingers gently through her long brown hair, comforting her as I’d done plenty of times before. The moonlight streamed through the window lighting up her beautifully sad face…I admired how stunning she was, and how she genuinely didn’t even know it; it was no wonder Harry was head over heels for her. If she wasn’t like a little sister to me I’m sure I would have fallen for her too. I could tell she was deep in thought by the way her eyebrow scrunched up together, her gaze far off – we were physically together but her mind was far off, somewhere else.

"What’s on your mind love?" I spoke in a whisper, gently pushing a strand of loose hair behind her ear.

She hesitated to speak as if she was afraid of breaking down all over again "I just don't want to say goodbye to you again," she said quietly looking up at me. I could see it in her eyes she was holding something back "I know Charlie, me too. But you and I both know that’s not all you'll be missing. When are you just going to tell me?" I questioned waiting for her to just admit it to me. I realized in that moment that I’d never once asked Charlie about her feelings for Harry. I mean I saw the way she looked at him, the way she subconsciously smiled with every word that escaped his mouth, and the way that whenever she looked at him, it were as if it were for the very first time. I hated myself in this moment. All along the signs were clear of how she felt and I ignored them. Maybe I wasn’t protecting Charlie; maybe all this time I was hoarding her for myself.