Focus on TinCan & KlaNo and a little AePete, TharnType or else. We'll see later.
This FF is a continuation of the last episode of LBC. How TinCan improved their relationship & how KlaNo lived a relationship based on lie.
All characters belong to P'M...
I woke up at 2 in the morning. Still in our original position, I'm in the arms of P'No. I woke up slowly, afraid to wake him up. I got up and sat leaning against the back of the bed so I could be more satisfied looking at him. I admit, I'm really selfish. During this time I only thought about how to get close and make P'No mine. The incident that night was also spontaneous, completely out of plan. Even though I admit I feel happy afterwards. I also realize that I always take advantage of P'No goodness. During those time I don't care about anything as long as I can always be with P'No. But the conversation before made me doubtful. I'm not worried about my feelings for him. Even if my feelings change, it only changes to become bigger, never decreases at all.
I really love P'No, or rather I say, I need him. I swear that I will make he happy whatever it takes. But now, I made him feel guilty like this. I had seen P'No feeling sad and crying, but the look he had last night was very different from the usual look of his sadness. There is sadness, fear and guilt in it. And I know, I'm the cause.
I just wanted to make P'No happy and be happy because of P'No, but it turned out that it actually made P'No feel very guilty. Knowing how 'responsible' P'No is for anything, I know that P'No will not be able to forgive himself easily.
I should have left him so that he will released from his burden and let him enjoy his life as before, who was happy without me, but I really couldn't. For the past 3 years, P'No is my reason to continue living. Just imagining I can see P'No every day, enough to make me dare to start the day. If I have to let him go, what will happen to me?
I kept looking at him until I realized that my tears flowed. I'm confused, what should I do ??? If I force him to be with me, he will continue to be haunted by that guilt and I don't know how to help him. But if I give in, how can I get to living my life ??
My handsome P'No. My cute P'No. My good P'No. My angel P'No.
The longer I look at him, the more my heart hurts. Knowing that my benevolent P'No must bear all of this himself. Resist guilt and try to accept me as his lover as a sense of responsibility. I'm sorry, P'No. Forgive my selfishness. Forgive me because I can't let you go. Forgive me.......
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TECHNO POV
As ussual, I woke up at 5 am but I was surprised to see Kengkla sleeping in a sitting position beside me. His eyes were slightly swollen and there were marks of tears on his cheeks.
"Nong Kla crying? Why? Is it because of my story last night that made him feel guilty for me ??? Aiisshh 'No, why are you so stupid? You destroyed the future of a kid as good as Nong Kla, now you hurt him with your problems," I said to myself .
