Don't Say Anything

43. Come Over

"I just want to sleep," I say with my face in my pillow.

"It's just after four o'clock Jessi. Are you really going to bed now?" Kira says from right next to me.

"Yes."

"It's Will, isn't it?" Avery knows everything. Well, what else would it be?

"Maybe."

"You'll feel better once you've talked about it."

"I doubt it."

"Please."

"I just want to sleep." I don't care if it's four o'clock. I'll feel better in the morning. I'd rather dream about a world where Will liked me as much as I like him.

I hear Kira sigh and pat my back. "I promised Nolan I would study with him. So now that you're back, I don't have to walk. I wish I could interrogate you more, but I have to go. I'll see you later, Jessi."

Why couldn't I have fallen for Nolan? He seemed like a nice enough guy when I met him at the party. He was definitely nicer than Will. So why did I pick Will to fall for? That's just it; I didn't pick Will. In the end, you can't really pick who you have feelings for.

The door closes and I'm left alone with Avery.

"Would it be easier just to talk to one person?" she asks taking Kira's spot next to me.

I sigh. If I'm ever going to get some sleep, I'm going to have to tell her something.

"He's not who I thought he was," I answer slowly turning my head.

"Who did you think he was?"

A million different positive characteristics come to mind.

"Not what he actually is."

"Is he a liar, a player, or just plain stupid?"

Her question almost makes me smile. Avery is so blunt that it's normally very entertaining. Right now, I don't really feel like laughing.

"I was the stupid one. I though that he liked me, just me. But I'm not enough."

She shakes her head in disappointment.

"Will and I aren't exactly friends. I don't think Will is friends with anyone but you. I see everyone at parties try to suck up to him because the girls want to be with him at the end of the night, and the boys want to be friends with Mr. Popular. Imagine if his parents were mildly famous or something. It would be out of control."

...or if he was rich. People are already fake to him. No wonder he doesn't want anyone to know he has a lot of money.

"Anyway," she continues. "He's always making-out with girls or disappearing with them." I already know this. I don't need to hear it again. "But that stopped months ago."

"What?"

"In like November."

That was around the time of my birthday. It was when we started studying at his house.

"What exactly stopped?" Now she's got my attention.

"Everything. He never disappeared from the party. I never saw him kiss anyone. He wouldn't even touch another girl or let them touch him. You should have seen the looks on those girl's faces, especially in the beginning. Priceless."

I smile with her. I can just picture those girl's reactions, but what Will did is what really makes me smile. Was it for me? Did he not want anyone else because of me?

That can't be true, not after what he said today, more like what he didn't say.

"What's wrong?" Avery asks when my face drops again.