Step 56: REMOVE him

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"F*ck. Ashley? Ashley, it's not what you-" Ethan said frantically, pushing Ivy away from him.

I shook my head. "Oh my god," I muttered.

"Ashley, listen to me-"

Fury took over my body. "You want me to listen to more sh*t? Go ahead. Lie to me some more," I cried, getting hysterical.

"Ashley, you're so dramatic," Ivy huffed.

"I swear if you don't f*cking disappear Ivy, I will make your life hell," Ethan snarled then faced me as she scuttled off. "Let's talk."

"About what? The fact that you lied to me about why Ivy's been texting you? Or that you won't tell me what's going on with Pierson?"

"That's what you're upset about? Get over it, Ashley."

I glared. "Sorry. Let's not forget that you were f*cking kissing her."

"Mistletoe and she had my phone."

"That's such a valid excuse," I hissed sarcastically. "You're such a d*ck. I'm done with all this."

"You're done? I've been picking up your sh*t for how long? You have no f*cking goals in life. All you do is get drunk and go out. Which is why you're single."

"And what about you?" I yelled. "You came to me!"

"And I regret it. I should have made it real a long time ago."

I ran my hand through my hair in frustration. "Then why did we continue this charade? You have Ivy and don't even try to convince me that you two don't have a thing."

"Why the hell do you keep bringing it up? I'm not f*cking with her. The kiss meant nothing," he growled.

"So you were going to kiss her and come back to me, acting like nothing happened?"

"For f*ck sake. I'm not dating her. You either for that matter."

The overwhelming feeling to cry came over me and I wrapped my arms around myself, moving away from him. "I get that Ethan. This was a mistake."

"What do you want me to say? Yes, I was f*cking Ivy behind your back? Would that make this better for you?"

"No, you son of a b*tch. I want nothing to do with you."

"You don't mean that," he said, his voice low.

"We're done. But there never was a we." I started walking away but he wasn't done.

"Don't act like you're innocent in this," he said.

"What the f*ck did I do?"

"You keep assuming things with no evidence." Ethan threw his phone at my feet. "You want to know what's going on? Check instead of coming to your own conclusions."

I picked up the phone from the floor then unlocked it to read the messages between him and Ivy.

Ethan: 9 o'clock don't be late

Ivy: I don't understand why you're wasting so much money on her.

Ethan: I'm proposing, not giving her a f*cking promise ring so if you're going to help, turn up on time

Ivy: I will.

I handed the phone to him, slamming it to his chest. "I don't f*cking care. You don't also care."

"Bullsh*t and you know it. This stopped being fake when I stayed at your apartment."

"And since then all you've done is act like a child with family issues and no real problems except whether or not he'll get daddy's company. I'm not a toy you get to play with when you feel like it," I snapped.

He stayed silent for a while and I watched the fight leave him. "I don't know what to say to you. Hell, I don't even know how I feel about you. And to think I wanted to start something serious but I can see we want different things," he said. "Enjoy the party. We'll talk later."

Ethan entered his room, closing the door in my face. And it was over. It was almost ironic that I couldn't get a real boyfriend but even my fake one didn't want me. My body was numb as I tried to understand our argument and what he had said.

I wanted to start something serious.

He was so f*cking difficult. The kiss between him and Ivy played through my mind like a broken record, reminding me why I was mad but the dull pain in my heart remained.

I wanted to kick open the door and demand that he explains himself but I had to get away from everything. Slipping out of the house, I followed the trail to the lake Ethan had shown me. I was going to leave. There was no reason to stay. I would resign, go back to Tash, live in my sh*t apartments and live like a normal person. However, I didn't want it. I wanted Ethan, I wanted the stupid arguments, I wanted to see him.

I just wanted him.

So like every cliché movie, I ran back. Well, I tried to in heels in a forest. Pushing open his door, I was ready to proclaim my feelings and forgive him. But it was empty - every trace of Ethan was gone except a box on the bed.

It was addressed to me with a note. I opened the present to find a gold bracelet with miniature charms of pizza, champagne and a heart. Hands shaking, I read the note.

I'm sorry that you're so f*cking stubborn that you won't see how much I care. I'm sorry for so much sh*t and I regret not making you mine.
~Ethan.

"Why do I feel f*cking guilty?" I cursed. I rushed out into the hallway then saw someone move in the darkness. "Ethan?"

Ivy stepped out from the shadows and stepped up to me, smirking. "He's gone. Finally, he left your sorry-"

I slapped her cheek with as much force as I could muster, leaving a red handprint. "Time's up, b*tch. If you think I'm going to sit back and let you have Ethan, you're stupider than I thought. Where the hell is he?"

"You slapped me."

"And?"

"You actually slapped me," she repeated in disbelief.

"I'll do it again. Where is he?"

"I don't know," she hissed. "I'm going to sue you."

"Go on then. I warned you what would happen."

"Ethan doesn't want you."

"I know," I muttered.

#

*laughs then cries*
Ashley! Ethan! My babies!
This book is coming to an end - HEADS UP
So I will miss everyone dearly.
*sits on a chair*
I am so confused what book to write next. I wanted to write some action sort of thing but teen fiction would be nice too. We'll see.
*waves*
Bye,
XO Nyx

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