Chapter 5-Oh Shit! Three James and Seducing All Around
"Oh Merlin!" Remus poked his James Potter cheeks he now owned, then ran a hand through his present dark messy hair. "No way," he said under his breath. "Untamed hair."
"Rrhhuh," James mumbled from the corner, signalling to Remus to get his attention back on the real James Potter with a sock in his mouth. However, Remus' attention was much elsewhere.
"How could this have happened?" Remus asked hysterically, examining his arms and hands - arms like runner beans, as Sirius poetically described.
"Rrhhuh," James mumbled louder and more impatient. He was choking on a filthy sock and covered in toothpaste - overall, not in the slight bit happy.
In his bewildered state, Remus bent down to his knees and untied James' arms and legs. Feeling he would get gratitude from being rescued, he was a little shocked to have the berserk James spring on him.
"I'm gonna behead you, Sirius!" James exclaimed, grabbing Remus' neck; or oddly, his own neck, as Remus now looked like him. It was a strange feeling to be strangling himself yet he didn't seemed to find himself stopping anytime soon.
"What are you talking about?" Remus yelled, choking. "I'm not Sirius! I'm Remus!" James was still not convinced, assuming he was lying. "You said the word 'gonna' which is grammatically incorrect! Use 'going to'!" he rectified, hoping James would see he was actually Remus Lupin. At his words, James quickly dropped his hands from his neck in realisation.
"Moony? You drank the Polyjuice potion, too?"
"Polyjuice potion?" Remus repeated. "Oh no..." He groaned, now realising what he'd drank from the bedside table. "This is ridiculous. I saw you, James, I think, leaving the common room with Peter."
"That must have been Sirius," James said bitterly, kicking the sink in frustration which led to him howling in pain.
"Why did Sirius even use the potion to turn into you in the first place?" Remus found himself already answering the question himself. "Lily..."
"That girl causes me all kinds of trouble," James commented, wiping toothpaste that somehow gotten onto his face.
"So," Remus started slowly, "I'm you, and Sirius is also you."
"Shit," James groaned, slamming his head against the bathroom wall. "Please don't tell me there are three James Potters currently in Hogwarts."
"Is that what you want to hear?"
"Not particularly." James slammed his head against the wall every two seconds, sounding like a regular drum beat.
"Then, no," Remus lied. "There are not three James Potters in school today. Although, one has gone off to 'seduce' Lily," he remembered 'James' telling him in the common room moments before. "Whilst two James Potters are currently in this bathroom... One contemplating therapy after this is over."
