Chapter 4-More Siriusly Absurd Ideas
"Moony!" Sirius ran over to Remus who had been reading a book in peace until his friend jumped on him and his face was suddenly overwhelmed by a head of black hair, and strangely fuchsia. Sirius was looking comically upset as he came up to Remus, Peter at his side wearing the trendy t-shirt displaying James' mother.
"What?" asked Remus distractedly, not taking his eyes off his book. Sirius sighed at him, grabbed Remus' book from his lap and tossed it into the common room fire.
"SIRIUS!" cried Remus, watching as the pages of his book burned in the fireplace. "That's the third book this week! You have got to stop doing that."
"I did it for your own good," Sirius replied. Remus was not at all grateful for his so-called act of good will.
"Come on, Remus, books don't teach you nothing!" Peter said, and Sirius nodded along in agreement. "It's not what's in here." Peter pointed to his head, which Remus was guessing was empty. "It's about what's in here that matters," he patted his chest, supposedly indicating to his heart. Remus might have took him seriously if he'd not hit his chest too hard, which resulted in Peter making a painful "ow".
"Wormtail, please, stop wearing that shirt," Remus pleaded. Ever since he'd worn it he'd taken on a new persona non grata, involving characteristics of a hippy and a permanent feeling of being high.
"I swear Pete has an obsession with James' mum," teased Sirius, poking him in the stomach.
"I'll have you know that I dress better than the average wizard." Peter puffed out his chest.
"Would your example of an average wizard be Sirius? Because Sirius dresses like a clown," Remus mentioned.
"I told you already, the red shoes are trendy! Red is the new black!" Sirius informed his friends.
"Oh God," Remus muttered, purely horrified by the conversation. He took a seat back on one of the common room chairs. He hoped the chair would swiftly eat him up or drown him in the cushions.
"Anyways," Sirius went on to his true purpose to finding Remus. "I have news of the grave-"
"Grave news," Remus tried to correct.
"Yeah, that's the one," Sirius said. "Well, Prongs is-"
"Missing?" Remus presumed.
"How did you know?"
Remus sighed, "Lucky guess."
"Have you seen him?"
"I think he might be upstairs in the dorm. If not, check the bathrooms," Remus recommended. "He's still dejected about Lily hating him so he may possibly be trying to kill himself again."
"It's becoming a daily habit. I think we should be worried," Sirius said thoughtfully.
Remus eyed him with suspicion. "Sirius, you didn't send out the search party again did you?"
"Of course not," he scoffed. "Another hour and I will, though."
Remus rolled his eyes as Sirius and Peter's exited up to the dormitories.
Just as Peter was about to push open the door to their dorm, Sirius stopped him.
"Five galleons Prongs is smothering himself with a cushion," Sirius wagered.
