After what seems like an eternity Kade lifts his head and looks at me. He’s pale and his face has that expression a dog has when it knows its done something wrong; all pleading, sorrowful eyes and downturned, simpering mouth.
In contrast, Twin:2, Lucindy, is positively glowing; her eyes glisten and gleam with delight as she continues to gush, “It’s very early days, but we’re all so excited. We have even chosen the name, if it’s a boy, of course we’ll call him Kade Junior, if it’s a girl, we’ll raise it a boy anyways. So boy or girl, we’ll have our very own Kade junior,” she says this while stroking her stomach affectionately.
Kelly passes by her brother and intentionally knocks her shoulder against him as she passes. When Kade flinches and looks at her, her face shows an obvious sign of disgust, “You were obviously having good times while I was freezing my butt off in her hell!” Her words are sharp with judgment.
Kade reaches out to her, “Hey Kelly…” she smacks his hand away with force, “Don’t touch me. And save your excuses for those who deserve them.” She gives me an affection shoulder squeeze and empathic look before throwing a fly pack to Troy, “Let’s fly back and stop Kelvin from playing that game, who knows what further destruction he's unwittingly causing – we need to achieve something constructive today,” she says, nodding toward the refugees rotting in the secure room. It’s getting worse in there by the minute.
My father appears somewhat alarmed, “No Kelly, don’t do that.” He walks over to her and turns her away from Lucindy’s view while he whispers, “There’s a high chance they’ll discover our hide out from your flight path. We know what route to take to avoid all their surveillance points.” Kelly takes this on board, nodding her head. “It’s best you help us load as much as possible into the truck,” he says, leading her away from the scene.
Troy doesn’t look at Kade; he just shakes his head and begins loading items into boxes – his disappointment is evident in his demeanor.
……
I feel cold: physically and emotionally. The truth is – this possibility had been floating around my conscience for a while. It would pop into my head when Kade was being all cute, goofy and making me laugh – just like this morning. But, I’d push it to the back of my head and tell myself I was being paranoid.
My heart already hurts for the innocent result of Kade’s infidelity, growing inside one of the world’s greatest evils. This is a situation – and I don’t want to be in it.
……
I’m aware of conversations and actions going on around me, but I’m not listening. I’m zoned out of my body and into my head – thinking.
Future plans and immediate actions pop into my head and I consider them all carefully.
There’s one idea that sticks, and gives me hope. I can go back to Chicago; I’ve done it before, I can do it again.
And I won’t wait around either; no – I’m off: tonight.
I’ll pretend to forgive Kade, make it look like everything’s going to be OK. Then I’ll sneak out in the dead of the night and start the journey back to the States. I’m not sure of the logistics yet – but desperate times call for desperate measures.
……
The thing is: I can forgive Kade for giving into temptation. But I can’t accept his barefaced lying to me. As he said – without trust we have nothing.
So – I have nothing here.
……
My mother’s words pull me away from my thinking, “You have your family here,” she says, embracing me.
