why me?; tommy

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prompt: tommy's family sucks.
request: no
based on true events
tw: depression, anxiety, sucidial thoughts and acts, homophobic comments, self harm

it's obvious tommy's parents loved his younger sister more than him. i mean, why wouldn't they? his sister did her chores, never yelled at their parents, and did everything they asked. the only thing she did wrong was failing school, but that's okay because she's a good girl at home.

tommy didn't mean to be a bitch to his family. but he's just tired all the time, he always had to do his works to keep his straight a's and if he failed a class, he felt like a disappointment. he wanted to die. the only reason why he talked back to his parents was because they had such bullshit rules. tommy couldn't hang out with tubbo because his dad don't like him, he couldn't ask what's for dinner, and he can't be pansexual. he can't love who he want to love without his dad screaming at him. "f^g," he called him once.

he's tired of his mom lying to her friends about him. "oh yeah, he threw a water bottle at me the other day. it almost hit holly in the face."

"because she kicked me out after i asked what's for dinner. i didn't even throw it at holly. i threw it to the ground so i could pack my things. fuck you mom for lying."

but of course, tommy is the liar. as always.

he couldn't even go shopping with them anymore. he 'wants too much' but his sister get everything she wanted. she got marvel pajamas, hoodies, t-shirt's, and more.

and when he asked for a hoodie, cardigan, and a fuzzy sweater, he got called a spoiled brat.

"you know we don't have a lot of money. you got to grow up and stop asking for money," she yelled in the middle of the store.

"fine, don't buy me anything then. don't worry about my christmas presents this year. give it all to holly, that's your favorite child anyway."

"don't yell at me, young man. you got to grow up. i cant believe i have to deal with you."

"fine, i'll kill myself."

"do it, you'll fail again."

they don't even notice his behavior changing. he used to be the bubbly child, always smiling and kind to others. he loved to draw.

now he draw on himself. the red paints the skin so perfectly. he knew it's wrong, but he have no one. he can't be a bother. no one care about him.

his parents have the nerve to bring up all the time he threw his phone at them, his water at them. but what about the time they sprained his pinky by kicking them? what about that time they broke his door down and sat on him, to the point where he couldn't breathe.

he really hate them.

but he don't at the same time.

because the same family also make him loved once in a while. buying him his vans, buying him a car (even though they use it against them), and get him his favorite drink every day.

he's conflicted.

only three more months until he can move out.

please let him survive.

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oof, this was a rant post. i'm sorry, im working on a part three of captured, i promise! i'm just lost at the moment. i'm upset bc the christmas present thing just happened. so lmao, love that.

although i told my mom all i want for christmas is a better mother figure... oops. fuck her.

anyway yeah, hope you guys have a good day/night <3

eat some food and drink some water if you haven't !!

i love you guys <33

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