A Bit Of Death

The Way Home

Hotch's POV
When I wake up I don't bother opening my eyes until I hear a loud engine start. The jet. Wait if I'm on the jet how did I get here, the last thing I remember is falling asleep with Spencer putting ice on my chest. I start to become aware of more things around me and I realize I'm on the couch and the team is getting settled. I keep my eyes closed and listen to them.
"Put him here, he'll be comfortable"-Rossi
"You know he wants to be close to Hotch"-JJ
"What do you think"-Emily
"Let him sleep here"-Morgan
"What if we let him sleep with Hotch on the couch"-Emily
"Isn't that a little risky, it could wake him"-JJ
The plane starts to take off.
"Wait let's see if one of them wakes up"-Rossi
After a moment of silence I finally shift and open my eyes but fake just waking up. At the same time I see Spencer shift in Morgan's arms. They all smile at me and I attempt to sit up, I gasp through clenched teeth in pain. Rossi speaks up "take it easy Hotch". I nod but don't lay back down.
Spencer continues to stir so I smile and say "I can take him Morgan".
He gives me a worried look before gently laying him on the couch and lowering his head onto my lap. He yawns and opens his eyes a little. I smile down at him and he sits up and leans into my side yawning again. I kiss top of his head and he says "you should be resting".
I tell him, "I woke up maybe a minute before you".
He says "yeah but still....can I check it out now?" Everyone is settled in now but they keep a close watch on us. I nod and Spencer unbuttons my shirt just enough to see the hurt area. I don't think I would have let him but I can tell he's really worried and the majority of the team has fallen asleep. He doesn't straddle me this time but has me lay on the couch and he knees on the floor. At first he just stares and then whispers "does it hurt?"
I watch him and say "a little". He looks up at me and I know he's worried about touching it. I run my hand through his hair and nod and he looks back down. I watch as he slowly and carefully places a hand on my chest.
After a moment he says "there's more bruises now". His hand moves so it barely touching the bruised rib and he asks "how is it?"
I close my eyes and say "it could be worse". His hand leaves my chest and he slowly starts to button my shirt up again. He rests his head on my shoulder and I readjust wincing and say "come here". Cautiously he lays on the sofa with me and I kiss his forehead and pull him close. He hides in my chest and we hold each other and fall asleep.

Reid's POV
I wake up to a hand on my shoulder and JJ's voice, "Reid we're gonna land in about 5 minutes".
I groan and say "okay" and lightly kiss Aaron and whisper "Aaron we're gonna land soon, we have to get up". He holds me tighter, I chuckle and slip out of his hold. He gasps through clenched teeth, as I help him sit up and the plane finally lands.
He glances at his phone he tells us, "head home, get some rest". His phone buzzes and he looks down, "come in for a couple hours at 4". Everyone nods and starts to leave the jet. Emily and Morgan help with our bags and JJ stays back to see if we need anymore help. I place a hand on Aaron's back and he grips my arm tightly and stands. I look to JJ and nod, I guide him off the jet and down the stairs fairly easily. JJ stays close behind to make sure we get to the car okay. She opens the car door and I help Aaron lay down in back. I go to drive but a hand on my shoulder stops me.
I turn around see Emily, she says "it's okay, stay with him". I thank her and then open door. Gently, I slip into the back and raise Aaron's head to lay on my lap, he smiles up at me and I slip my hand into his. After a bit I let go and place my hand on the side of his face and gently stroke his cheek with my thumb. He turns his face into my hand and I watch him as he closes his eyes to try and control the pain. When we pull in I help him sit up and get out of the car. I help him slowly up the stairs and Emily brings in our bags. After I help Aaron change I lead him to the bed. As I help him lay down there's a soft knock on the door and I turn to find Emily in the doorway with our bags.
I gesture to the open closet doors and say "thanks Emily, you can put them over there".
She gives me a small smile and says, "no problem," and then leaves the room, closing the door behind her.
I carefully pull Aaron's shirt off so I have a clear view of his chest. Straddling him I take a closer look at his chest, I frown and Aaron reaches up to place a hand on my face and asks "what's wrong?"
Starring at his chest I mumble "I didn't notice". He gives me a questioning look and then I speak up and say "it's swelling....I'm going to get ice. Relax. Okay?" He nods and I stand up and kiss him before leaving to get ice. Emily is standing in the living room when I get downstairs, she looks up set so I ask, "what's wrong?"
She looks up and she says "the man who came to repair my wall found strange wiring so he called a friend to check it out. He said if you where to turn on the light a bomb would be activated or go off".
Shocked I say "oh god Emily, you know you can stay here as long as you need".
She nods and says "thanks Reid....I'm gonna get some sleep".
I say "okay" and head off to the kitchen to get ice. As I grab a towel and glance at the clock, jack will get home before we leave and Haley will pick him up sometime after he gets home. Before I go upstairs I get Advil and a water. I don't want Aaron to wait any more so I grab the towel and ice and head upstairs. Closing the door behind me I smile at him. As I stand next to the bed I wrap the ice in the towel so it's not too cold. I place the ice on the table and give him the Advil and tilt his head up so he can take it easily. After he takes the Advil I have him lay back down and I let my hand drag across his chest, barely touching it before I glance at the clock and gently place the ice on his chest. He hisses in pain and I kiss him and say, "I'm so sorry Aaron. I'm sorry". I apologizes because this shouldn't have happened I should have prevented this and he knows I'm taking it out on myself.
He grabs my hand tightly and says "it is not your fault and don't you ever think it is. I'll be okay, go change". I nod and give him a weak smile before I stand to change. I throw on black sweats and a gray t-shirt, carefully I climb into bed with him. Instead of laying down I sit cross legged on the bed and play the hem of my shirt. Aaron reaches up and places a hand on my face as asks "what's wrong spence?"
Sighing I tell him, "I'm not sure I can do this. I don't think I'm strong enough. One moment I feel like everything is perfect and the next I want to cut and hide from the world. And some days...." I stops and I feel like I can't bring myself to say it, I can't lie to him but I know I have to tell him. I finally manage to choke out "some days I panic...but not like normal people. As in severe panic attacks."
My voice goes small and he whispers "why didn't you tell me spence".
"I thought it was getting better, I thought you didn't need the extra hassle....I'm sorry". When I tell him I feel tears coming but instead I stare at my wrists and look at the scars.
Aaron let's hims hand drop to hold mine and he says "it's okay spence, it's my job to worry about you. I love you and want you to be okay and happy. I will always help you... I love you spence".
I give him a small smile and say "I love you too". And take the ice off his chest and tell him "you should rest".
With a small smile he says, "I want to stay up with you". I shake my head but he says "please". I give in and nod and we stay in silence most of the time. When I yawn he says "you should sleep," I shake my head and say "no it's fine. I need to stay up".
He knows it's me taking care of him but he says "will you lay down with me?"
I give him a weak smile and lay next to him, I keep my phone on the bed with us so I can check the time. It's been about 15 minutes so I take the ice off for a bit. We lay there in silence for a while, he plays with my hair, weaving it between his fingers. We don't break eye contact either, we stare into each other's eyes for hours. Based on alternating with the ice I know that jack will be back soon and I can hear Emily up and moving. I finally hear a knock at the door and Emily gets it, I can hear Jack's excited voice and I tilt my head to look at Aaron.
Quietly I say "I'll go see him, you get some rest". He shakes his head and I chuckle and say "you are extremely stubborn".
Grinning up at me he says "but you still love me".
Smiling I say "how could I not". I give him a worried look and I help him sit up. Slowly we stand and I wrap an arm around his waist and we head downstairs.