Mani POV
Two days later
Home Chicago IL 3175 words
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
" bestieeee"
" huh? Wher-bestieee?"
Is the first thing I hear when I walk into my second period class. I walk over to the table of desk we usually sit at everyday.
" hey" I wave as they just stare at me.
" hey? That's all your ass been gone for 5 days where the fuck you been at zamani?" Trell leans forward staring at me. I look down at the ground fidgeting with my fingers.
The past five days I've spent two with Santana and then came back home and got a hotel. I used that time to think about everything and that's been going on. I forgave trell, it's no use in holding on to anger because one day he could be infront of me and the next day he wouldn't be on this earth. And I just to say I love this man to much to just throw our relationship away but I know my worth and I won't let him treat me anything less than that.
We both said and did hurtful things to each other; him more than me but that's besides the point. I spent a day at the spa just to myself without my cellphone; no technology really and just enjoyed myself and enjoyed my own company sometimes that's all people need time to themselves.
I had to come back tho. Since we only had three day weekend and I missed two days of school so.
When I look up zaza and jaja don't even look at me they barely acknowledge my presence. I know it wasn't fair to just bail but I needed space plus I missed my brother and bestfriends including trell fine toxic ass .
" I just needed time to myself" I try to explain
" you could've still called and told us you were ok" trell softens his tone.
" I did call I talked to my daddy" zaza scoffs
" yeah before yo ass went off the grid" he says harshly.
Zaza has abandonment issues since his parents died when he was little he never really had anyone to take care of him. He was looking out for himself until he turned 16 and when his auntie kicked him out for having sex In Her apartment he been on his own besides having my dad and the boys.
" bestfriend I'm sorry" I poke my bottom lip out.
" sure" he goes back to playing his games on his phone.
Imma have to talk to him later.
" Kira"
" it's okay I forgive you I was just worried. You could've have let me know." She hugs me
" I love you"
" I love you to" she sits back down next to jaja.
" sister come here" he squeals.
" brother" I enbrace him in a hug.
He squeezes me. Muffing my head he says" don't ever do no shit like that again"
I nod smiling. Before mugging his ass back.
" keep them Kira clit masssagers to yourself" I laugh.
The sound of a chair screeching across the floor makes us look at trell. He walks out of the room slamming the door.
Oh my god his dramatic ass.
Looking at my teacher he nod his head giving me permission. I know exactly where he went.
Walking into the library corner I see Dontrell sitting on a stack of books. He says he likes coming in here because he likes the quiet expecially because he always has people talking in his ear. He has his head in his hands. I go to pull at his hand to lift his head but he refuses.
" I'm sorry mani i fucked up I didn't mean non of the shit I said to you. I'm sorry I cheated even though we never stated verbally that we were in a commitment we still knew what it was. That was wrong of me and I'm sorry I pulled a gun on you and had somebody fuck up yo friend. But baby please I need you I ain't been right since we ain't been right. It's been thirty-five days since we been us. I can't function right knowing that we not right. I can't eat ,sleep ,I been off angry baby I'm sorry please forgive me" by the time he's done he has his face hidden into my stomach with his arms wrapped around my waist.
" trell"
"....."
" Dontrell look at me" I cup his checks making him look at me. " I forgive you ok we both did shit and said shit to each other to hurt the other persons feelings. But I forgive you as long as you forgive me ok?" He nods
" Now gimmie hug I missed you" he smiles standing up with out hesitation embracing me for a hug. When he wraps his arms around my waist I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and he does the same into my neck.
" I missed you too mamas" he kisses my earlobe. sending a chill down my spine.
I missed his warmth and his presence, the way he would make me feel wherever our skin had the simplest encounters.
After a second we both pull away just staring at eachother.
Him so fine.
He still looks the same like he hasn't slept and his face kinda pale. I run my thumbs over his eyebrows then smooth my hand over his hair. He hasn't gotten a hair cut so it kinda grew. Papa been fucked up. He stares behind me and grinds his teeth together.
Gabbing his check with both of my small hands and I pull his attention back to me.
" we gonna get you right ok?"
He nods he doesn't even ask what I'm talking about because he knows that I know it's all in his face. I'll lecture him later about whatever he's been takin but right now he don't need that he just need comfort and me.
"Lets go back to class ok?"
" I'm tired tho" he pulls me back nuzzling his face into my neck and shoulder.
" it finna be third period then next thing you know it's gonna be time to go" I rub his back.
" you gonna come with me?" He looks up at me out the corner of his eyes. I fight the urge to kiss him when he forms at pout on his lips.
" Dontrell we cant be doing that stuff anymore I forgave you but you hurt my feeling"
" so when you said you was done you was for real?" He pulls away standing up straight towering over me with his 6'2 height compared to my 5'6.
" ye-no I don't know Dontrell" I play with my fingers. I take a second them respond again.
" yes I was for real we're toxic for each other whenever we get into a argument we say the most hurtful things to one another"
" we're not toxic everyone argues mamas that don't mean we not supposed to be together"
" ok but we just friends" I say seriously
" yeah ok we just friends for right now. Imma give you your space after tomorrow so you can think but that don't mean you can be out here doing single shit you hear me?"
" yup" I pop the p.
Hoe I'm single and free.
" so where was you at and who was you with? Don't fucking lie to me either" I gulp hard
Should we lie?
I don't know bitch you know he kinda crazy.
" first I was just finna find a hotel but I thought and realized that it was only Friday and that j had the whole weekend so I went to Indiana went shopping and a spa I spent 3 pays to myself and therestwithtana" I say the last part fast and low.
" girl you know I ain't hear that shit speak up"
" I was with tana" I exhale
" stop calling that nigga that. his name is Santana the only people you allowed to give nicknames to is Zaza,jaja,and me." He pops me in my mouth not to hard but no soft either. Just enough so I understand him.
Umm sir I'm kinda single until you learn how to act right.
" speaking of which don't ever call another nigga my shit " he puts the emphasis on ever And MY shit looking me dead in my eyes.
" you heard me?" He grabs my chin. I nod knowing he's talking about when I was being petty and called Santana papa.
" good now let's go so this school shit over with so we can hurry up and go cause I'm trying to get us home so we can go to sleep" he grabs my hand pulling us out of the library.
" so YOU can go to sleep" I state
" no so WE can go to sleep I know you ain't sleep good without me either" we walk up the stairs. I don't respond because he's right. When we reach the classroom before he opens that door I speak up.
" papa" I say softly tugging on his hand . Imma let him have today and toma then I have my space cause I need him right now but I also need my space. He turns around with a raised eyebrow when I give him a sad face he leans against the lockers pulling me into him by my waist.
" go ahead baby" I missed the way that word came out of him mouth and the sound of it. It just sounded so smooth. Like god made that word for him to call me that.
" what if he don't forgive me for leaving?" I ask thinking about zaza
" mamas believe it or no he just mad and a little hurt that you didn't contact him. He needs you more than you need him , so when y'all in private just talk to him, Do it when we get back home ok." He kisses my forehead.
" have yo talked to your pops or ma"
" yes yesterday and today before I came back."
I called them yesterday to just explain hoping that they wouldn't tell be to mad that I just ran off. But my mama understood and she reassured me that my daddy was not gonna whoop me after he threatened to. I called him this morning after he called Down and just told him I love him.
" ok don't do no shit like that agin let somebody know your ok at least had nigga finna kill niggas" he chuckles
" what about Ronald?" I'm ashamed of what I said cause that out his life in danger. After finding out that trell just as crazy as my pops I learned not to say certain shit like that. Cause they crazy and will end a nigga quick.
" just know he ain't dead might be a lil hurt but not dead only because I knew your ass was lying." He laughs pushing himself off the lockers.
" I'm sorry" I apologize
" me too baby now come on" he pulls me
Going into the classroom hand in hand we sit down.
" zaza I'm sorry I didn't call but I wasn't gone for that long." I whisper
" cool" he shrugs. I decide to leave it alone for a while.
After school at home
We're all sitting in trell car in front of my house.
" daddy say he gonna be back in a couple days he had to go see about one of his buildings in Alabama " Kira informs me. I just nod gettin out of the car.
Going to my mamas room I see her laying on her stomach.
" mama me, Kira and the boys here." She just groans into the pillow walking out I go to my room.
" bestie"
" you not mad at me no more?" I smile
" If you get me a honey bun from the kitchen I'll love you forever and give you a hug" he gives me the most adorable puppy dog face so I can't say no.
Coming back up stairs I give zaza his honey bun and go to lay down.
" damn can I get some room" all they ass laying in my bed. No space for me and it's MY bed.
" y'all can go in Kira room frl" I tell jaja and Kira.
" you don't gotta tell me twice; come on pooh" jaja says pulling Kira up slapping her butt.
" nigga don't be touching my bestie like that" I busk are him.
" you should see how you bestie be touching me" I scrunch my face up in disgust cause I did not need to know that.
Kira probably gonna tell me about that later.
" and you go bother my mama or some I'm sleepy" I tell zaza
" fine I miss my baby mama anyway" he rolls his neck getting up before he leave out the door he turns back around.
" trell why your ass still here" Zaza asks
" I'm finna go to sleep with her. Duh" trell kicks off his shoes and pulls him jacket off.
" really bestie you gonna let him stay" zaza acts hurt.
" sorry bestie we'll do something this weekend" I smile
" ok" he smiles leaving out closing the door behind him.
After he leaves I change my clothes gettin in the shower. Connecting my speaker I step in letting the hot water run down my back while my music from my speaker plays.
I wanna put you in seven positions for seventy minutes
You'll get it babe
You got a lot on your mind
And I want to ease it up and lick it and slip it in , You do a light scream on the ice cream
When I scoop it and dip it in
Unzipping her tight jeans, and the feminine hygiene , Is magnificent
Ooh yeah
I promise not to give it to nobody babe
And promise you won't give it to nobody babe
And promise when you promise, keep them promises
After listening to a couple more I finally feel clean and get out. Finishing my hygiene I get dressed in a big shirt. Going to my bed where trell is laying with one of his arms over his phone and the other in his pants.
I climb in the bed laying next to him.
" I'm sorry ma I'm so sorry" his voice cracks a little at the end but he tries to cover it up with a cough.
" what wrong?" I ask softly
" I fucked yo and now I'm gonna lose you." He turns his face to look at me. His eyes are glossy a single tear comes down his cheek but I wipe it.
" why you keep trying to leave me?"
" why you keep doing stuff to make me want to?" I counter back.
" cause I know you gonna leave me anyway might as well get it over with" he mumbles
" what you on?" I try to look into his eyes but I hear him sigh.
" I've been drinking that shit and I can't seem to stop"
" why'd you start?"
" I needed to feel numb and not think about everything with the traps and Killa and you I just didn't want to feel no more and I first started about two months ago that's when I first cheated I had went to do this thing with jaja and zaza and it didn't go as planned I couldn't talk to you about it because you didn't know at the time and I did something bad mamas really bad " he explains shedding a few more tears.
" you not a monster and I know that because monsters don't feel regret they don't morne they ones that they've killed. Just cause you did a bad thing doesn't make you a bad person or a monster it just makes you a human being who did a bad thing and has to live with it. Papas you can't have that guilt around your neck forever deal with it and move on most of all learn from it ok?" I rub his cheek with my thumb. He opens to his mouth to say something but I cut him off.
" I don't want to know just remember what I said ok" I kiss his cheek. " go get in the shower and come to bed" I order.
He doesn't say anything just walks into the bathroom. After about thirty five minutes he comes out with a towel wrapped around his waist.
" your shelf still in their" I tell him. He has his own self in my closet for his clothes whenever he stays over. I have my own at his house in his room. He comes out the closet in basketball shorts.
After he Joins me in bed I lay my head right above his heart something I do often.
" no" he pushes me off I give him a confused look until he scoots down and lays his head on my chest. One of His arms wrapped around my waist and the other has his hand under my shirt lightly squeezing my tittle.
" Dontrell" I call
" hm?"
" I just...." I stop
" i know mamas just today and toma then space. But I meant what I said"
" I know" I nod
" no that.. well yeah that to but when we was arguing"
" huh?" I ask truly confused
" when I told you I love you I meant it with everything in me I did" he clarifies
I love you. Awe wait he loves me?
" you really do? " I ask after a moment of silence. He nods Lazily. I smile at him rubbing his ear and over his durag.
" can I get a kiss?" I really need one. He lifts up kissing me at first the kiss is slow and passionate. Telling me all his feelings the kiss is filled with hunger and love coming from both of us. I add tongue to deepen the kiss flipping us over.
He pulls away allowing me to catch my breath resting his forehead against mine.
" I love you to daddy" I bit my bottom lip.
" mamas don't do that" he groans putting his face into my neck.
I want sum penetration
" what I do" I smirk
" look at me like that. Calling me that do sum to me, that shit sound so right coming outta yo mouth when you say it to me" I feel him lick his lips.
" Mhm mhmmm" I grind my hips against him feeling his growing erection.
" baby stop" he warns
" but I'm horny papa you gonna fuck me" I whisper seductively in his ear. He lifts his head looking at me in my eyes and examining my features.
" when you ready" he kisses my lips going back to him position earlier. I huff knowing he's right right now is not the right time.
But we want it
Shit up I tell the voice inside my head. Trying to make me do shit I ain't supposed to be doing. Yet.
" good night papa"
" girl it's only 5:00 we taking a nap"
" I said what I said good night papa I love you"
" I love you to mamas now be quiet I haven't slept good in a good as month my sleep is well over due. " I laugh shitting up cause he needs the sleep and so do I.
______________________________
Vote + comment
I update every three days